Any singer-songwriters out there?

I made another account just to ask this question.

A few days ago, a thought popped into my head. That thought became a phrase which eventually became a song. If anyone is willing to proofread my lyrics and critique it, please message me!! I wrote it in about 15 minutes and normally when that happens it's either a really good song or a really bad song.

Updates:
I would put the lyrics here but it exceeds the character count. :(
Please message me!
Alright so I realized I could just update it twice to get all the lyrics.

Today was awful, just like yesterday
Made some picture perfect memories
Sang a song too long to remember our last days
but remembered why we parted ways.

Under the sweet summer air
Thinking of him everywhere
Thinkin of the days to come and...
What we have and should've done
and rememb'ring why we parted ways
Pleasure to meet you, how have you been
That was the start and the end of him
Cause soon he met another girl and said once again
Pleasure to meet you, how have you been

Too bad I came at the wrong time
Too bad I really said Hello
If I could only press rewind and knew how to read his mind,
I would've known he really just meant
Hello.
––––
Sorry for the super late update. The above is a continuation of the lyrics from my previous update. I can't message anyone since I am still only 1 xper. :(

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I write songs-- I can't guarantee I'm the greatest in the world, but I'm willing to try and help you out! I play drums, guitar, and bass so if you need help with the instruments feel free to ask about that too.

    Granted, I can't send you a message when you are anonymous.

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    • Thanks!
      I can't message anyone since I am still only 1 xper. (The FAQ says I need to be >1 to send messages)
      I'm not anonymous anymore so you can message me.
      Sorry for the super late reply.

Most Helpful Girl

  • My sister's boyfriend is a singer/song writer, producer, etc...
    You can send me the song and I can then send it to him for feedback.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I can give it a shot if you'd like
    I both sing, and I write.

    You're anonymous so you'll have to PM me
    I'll do my best, to positively critique. ^.^

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    • Thanks!
      I can't message anyone since I am still only 1 xper. :(
      I'm not anonymous anymore so you can message me.
      Sorry for the super late reply.

  • Yes I'm a song writer, studio engineer, and producer, and yes those are very good well written melodic lyrics you have written there.

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    • Thanks!
      Content-wise, what do you think? Does it seem sort of hollow/empty?
      Please be honest. Criticism is really what I'm asking for.

    • You're welcome and no it's neither hollow nor empty. What it is is it's an emotional balled and that's very good because balled's stick around a long time especially when they tap the emotions. I'm about to send you a private message, is that ok?

    • Ah ok cool.
      Yep, go right ahead.

  • I'm a guitarist songwriter, I don't sing. I could, but I don't, really I'm not tonedeaf, I can sing, just not in front of people, or in the shower.

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What Girls Said 1

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