My girlfriend wants me to get rid of my female friend?

Question

I have this female friend that I've had since middle school. Waaaaay before I even met my girlfriend. She's my best friend, we 100% don't have feelings for each other either. We do hang out a lot, but just as much as my girlfriend hangs out with her friends.
She told me I should find a male best friend like a normal guy. She's so worried that there's something more between us, when there's not. I love her but I don't want to give up one of the best friends I've had

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Lets pretend the genders were reversed for a second and you were a woman and your boyfriend wanted you to give up your male friend. You know perfectly well what kind of answers you would be getting then. Women are taught to stand up for themselves. Men are taught to be self sacrificing for women. That is why you are not getting the same types of answers a woman would get. I would suggest you take the advice a woman in your position would be given. Don't let your partner tell you who you are allowed to be friends with.

At best this woman is not compatible with you. At worst she wants to sabotage your relationships so that she can gain more control over you. Heck she is even trying to tell you what is and isn't normal behavior for a guy as if she would know more about guys than you do. If she is this controlling over a friend from middle school, then this woman will eventually eat you alive.

What is she going to do if you don't give up your friend? Will she break up with you? If your relationship is that fragile then you don't have a relationship worth saving, let alone losing a good friend for.

elew4too · Accepted Answer

There's three scenarios:

1. You stop hanging out with your best friend in order to please your girl: If the relationship doesn't work out, then you just showed your best friend that you will forget her in a second over a girl.

2. You refuse to stop hanging out with your best friend: Your girl will be bitter, and she will feel uncomfortable throughout your relationship, but your friendship with your best friend remains solid.

3. Find a new girl

I like #2. Your girlfriend could grow comfortable with your best friend as time goes on, and if not, you can revert to option #3. You'll never be able to live your childhood with anyone else again, but you can always get a new girlfriend.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

What beats me is if you now have a girlfriend why the hell are you hanging out with your female friend? no one is saying you can't still be friends with your female friend i'm sure your girl would even understand that but what you are doing is sharing time that you should be spending with the one you love, you are the one creating a problem it's not rocket science you have a girl she should be the main focus you should not be hanging out with this female friend at all you want your cake and eat it too you are getting what you want your girlfriend feeling insecure and your female friend gets to enjoy your company do you see what's happening here if not then let your girl go and spend all the time in the world with your female friend, i agree with your girl it's not viable.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Well I could see why your girlfriend would be like this. Yes, you can have friends in a relationship but you hanging out with your best friend just as much as your girlfriend? Red flag. If this keeps going, your girlfriend will have resentment towards you and your best friend which will cause arguments. Then it'll cause you to reach out to your best friend and vent. Which will lead to you guys having feelings for each other. I've seen it happen. She will be the rebound girl and you will dump your girlfriend. My advice: Tone it down with the best friend. I'm not saying to stop hanging out with her but maybe hang out a little bit less.

Kira88 · Accepted Answer

Well I would ask why you and your friend haven't gotten together, you probably did at one point but decided to be just friends. Regardless as a girlfriend I would be trusting to my partner because as a girlfriend I can do a lot more pleasing then a best friend. Your girl is insecure, let her know that she means the world to you and that should be enough to ease her jealously. If its not your girlfriend is immature and it will eventually lead to you being controlled by her actions. Real loving partners don't change their boyfriends.

CHARismatic110 · Accepted Answer

If she was a friend before you and your girlfriend met, then I don't feel like you should have to stop being friends with her. It all comes down to trust.

Zxmml · Answer

It's something she should be able to handle. If she can't deal with that then that's her issue. You can't dictate who someone is friends with, especially if they've been friends with them for a long time. It shows a lack of respect and maturity and indeed lack of trust in you. I think this needs to be pointed out to her. If she is going to look for problems that aren't there or ask you to change something due to her insecurities then maybe you need to ask if this is really what you want from a relationship.

Anonymous · Answer

If you have had a friend since middle school, and she is your best friend you 100% should keep your integrity and stick up for your friendship. Sounds like your friendship would outlast that relationship anyway. I had a guy friend that did this to me, because his girlfriend was behind it. His girlfriend and I were really close too but I don’t think she liked it deep down that we were close. She is jealous and insecure. The best part is, I myself have a fiancé! And we are all very close but not anymore because he allowed her to ruin that.
So my suggestion to you is, when you find a really good friend you shouldn’t have to sacrifice that and if you had a good partner they wouldn’t make you.

9mfeo · Answer

Oh man, that's not fair. How disrespectful of her.  I hate when people do this. You're allowed to have friends.

WhitneySnow · Answer

I disagree with your girlfriend but you need to reassure her that there is absolutely nothing romantic between you and your BFF

worldscolide · Answer

Friends are forever Girlfriends can be replaced. I suggest you educate her on that fact. A woman who tries to take your friends away are not worthy of your attention.

Speedy94 · Answer

Looks like jealousy, you should make an appointment with all three to clear out the problem. A good talk can solve a lot. Good luck!

serious · Answer

That is a tough situation you are in. Let me see if I can come up with a good answer

Agape93 · Answer

Glad you aren't with her. Fuck that controlling shit

Designerfeels · Answer

don't if she is just a friend there's no problem with it

BigDog1989 · Answer

I'll never understand why you need a girl 'friend" if you have a girlfriend, what is the LITERAL POINT

Dkc123 · Answer

Get rid of your gr bro.. trust me no matter what she'll always ne insecure..

Dred1614 · Answer

Ask your girlfriend this: "if you don't trust me, then why are we together?"

skeptic007 · Answer

don't do it keep your female friends around trust me it will keep her in check

gothbxtch · Answer

red flag on her part

Anonymous · Answer

That is hard

My girlfriend wants me to get rid of my female friend?

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