Parents, do you want to be your child's best friend?

[OlderAndWiser]

I occasionally hear a young person make the statement that they always want to be their child's best friend. It makes me think that this parent either has no idea about what they should be doing as a parent, or they are so starved for social interaction that they are willing to forego their parental responsibilities to gain another "friend." However, that is just my perspective, and maybe there are good reasons why a person would want to be their child's best friend. What do you think?

I have children and yes, I want to be my child's friend at all times and in all ways

I have children and yes, I want to be my child's friend but not at the expense of teaching my child discipline and respect

I have children and no, a parent should never try to be their child's best friend

I don't have children but if I did, being their friend sounds like a great idea.

I don't have children but if I did, being their friend sounds like it could be a good idea.

I don't have children but if I did, being their friend sounds like a bad idea.

I don't have children but if I did, being their friend sounds like a really, really horrible idea.

[FashionQueen86]

I think when people say they want to be their child's best friend, they do have good intentions. They want to be the best person they can be in their child's life and assure them they can be depended on in every way.

But does being their best friend mean you give in to what they want to do? Does it mean to say what they want to hear rather than what they need to hear? Does it mean not disciplining them in ways they should in order to learn and experience very important life lessons? A parent has a very strict and important place in a kid's life, just as a teacher does, a boss, etc.

Now, if the kid grows up into like their twenties, that's a different thing, becuase I hear all the time that mothers and grown daughters go out together all the time for a girl's night out or go shopping and stuff like that. That's fine. But a child needs parental guidance and influences.

[Bluemax]

Yep.

[Anonymous]

If I am my sons' or daughters' best friend, I have failed my job as a parent! Now to be considered as one of their best friends, I'll accept that. When you raise your child/children to be strong, independent, confident young men and women, they will develop natural best friends which will not be mom or dad.

Your child will have a few best friends in their lifetime: elementary, high school, college, and after you start a family. On a rare occasion that best friend can be the same person, but it should never, never, never be the parent!

[Bluemax]

Preach.

[miamigirl1970]

There is a thin line with this question: I have one son, he is now grown. My husband and I are much better friends with him over the last several years since he has had his own children. but as he was growing up, I didn't want to be his friend. If I was being too nice to him, I always felt as if I wasn't doing my job. I believe it is all in the time of their life. Love them, give them wings, and let them fly!

[xHoneyxBeex]

I don't have children but when I do, I don't plan on trying to be their "best friend." They will have plenty of friends, but I am the parent and they are the child. That's how the dynamic should be in my opinion. I imagine they would have very little respect for me or my authority as a parent if I just tried to be their friend all the time.

[Bluemax]

Souls of the unborn, if you can read this, take note. Get in line to be this woman's child. You will be grateful you did.

[xHoneyxBeex]

@Bluemax hahaha! :)

[gmanhotman]

I've been around kids most of my life and what I've tried to do is what my parents did with me. I'm not here to be your friend. that is what your friends are for as well as should things get serious and a punishment or correction be needed do you listen to a frind who says go to your room? hell no. that being said just being fare with people and having a good time even if we had to punish a child they always wanna come back or don't want to leave. it's not a hard thing but does take some time patience and practice.

[Bluemax]

I never had children and, alas, I never will. Some of my students confided they wished I was their father. I felt kind of sad for their real fathers.

I aspire to be better than my child's best friend. I aspire to be their father.

[NexAngelus]

im obviously much younger ;) but i have a lot of other students in my classes do the same... kinda creepy since im not really much older just a shit ton wiser lol and awesome

[Anonymous]

I would be my childs best friend.
Children go through a lot, and to have a parent they can openly talk to is a good thing. I want to be that kind of parent who's children can tell her everything, and they won't be afraid.
I believe if you are your childs best friend, then they will respect you more.
My mother didn't do that for me, and that is why I am a bottled up person. I don't tell her much (I love her, tho. She is my mummy. 😊)
I don't believe your child is supposed to be afraid to talk to about anything. It will help them if they are able to tell their parents anything, and it will help the parents get to know their child better, and it will help them help the child if something is wrong.

But then again, that is just my opinion.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[19magic]

Being a friend to my child when I have one is a great idea. It's how I was brought up, well mostly. Of course you need a stern hand sometimes and need to keep them in place otherwise they'll never respect you or the rules you set, always undermining them as you don't believe in them yourself.

[peachblossomluck]

You want your child to feel as if they can approach you with relevant issues in their life but being a parent is a responsibility, not something to be looked upon casually.

[Bluemax]

Amen

[peachblossomluck]

@Bluemax Remember the typical baby boomer parent lament: "You kids didn't come with instructions? " That was a usual copout for being the friend, not the parent like they couldn't just step up and be adults or something.

[Cakzxx]

Your bio😂😂😂😂😂

[peachblossomluck]

@Cakzxx Thanks, Man:)

[NexAngelus]

no children but horrible idea. im here to lay the law down not fucking suck up to the little brats. they will thank me in 20 years when they are fucking awesome and not pieces of shit like all the other turds of their generation.

[Curlybeauty17]

When I have kids, it'd be nice to be friends with my children but first and foremost I will be a mother. If you did something terribly wrong, I will hand out an ass whoopin' if nessecary and I won't give a flying fuck if you get in your feelings.

[Anonymous]

My mom is my best friend. This hasn't had a negative impact on our parent-child relationship. Quite the opposite. I respect my mom, she's the only human in the world I trust blindly and I even prefer spending time with her than with my friends. On the other hand, I get along great with my dad but 'm definitely not friends with him.

[Opinion Owner]

Also, my mom has fulfilled her role as my mother almost perfectly (because no mortal human is perfect). She is goals.

[Likes2drive]

Well I have 3 daughters and try to make them feel like they can tell me anything as a friend but I'll still discipline them and want respect so there is a fine line to that

[Nothanks700]

I don't think I've met someone who said "my parent is my best friend" and was a troubled bad egg at the same time. That doesn't mean you can't punish your kids when neccessary, I've just noticed parents that are friends with their kids have no real reason to punish them, because they rarely do anything bad.

[akadatank44]

When i hear parents say that or children i automatically think you're not doing your job as a parent if you are your child's best friend.
Down the road at my age yeah you can be friends but not when they are growing up.

[Anonymous]

Obviously as a parent you want your child to feel as if they could talk to you about anything jut as they would their friend. But at the same time you want them to know that first and foremost you're their parent.

[Saoirse_Nua]

I have no children and voted G, it is a terrible idea for reason B "at the expense of discipline and respect"

[Saoirse_Nua]

Maybe I should qualify it and say I would want to be approachable in other instances,

[Marinepilot]

OlderAndWiser-Hippies had that mantra. Let's see it went something like, "Be
a friend to your children and parenting will naturally occur" Yes, the Moon is made of cheese and pass the crackers. If we believe this then, rasslin' is real
and the Moon shots were fake.

[OlderAndWiser]

I think you are onto something!

Lunch tomorrow?

[Marinepilot]

Sure. I'll call early.

[OlderAndWiser]

10-4

[Anonymous]

I think when a lot of people say that they mean they want to be someone their kids can talk to and confide in and seek advice from...

[babeeeone]

I do but I also want them to respect me as their parent

[karahiri]

I'm not a paremt, but I sincerely hope I can be a good friend to my kid. I'd want to be a supportive person, who listens, who empathizes, and who can offer advice.

[TheDeplorableOne]

I want to be my child's friend...

THIS WON"T END WELL. :(

[Anonymous]

I don't have children but if I did, being their friend sounds like a really, really horrible idea.

[Dred1614returns]

I'm glad my parents never tried to be my friends.

[LivingLife94]

Yeah, good friends not best friends

[yfuktyfug]

can you answer my questions please x

[CheerGirl38139]

G. 100%