Why did he act so into me and just go MIA?

[roaming]

I was seeing a guy for a few months. He acted really into me told me he had deep feelings for me though he lived 3.5 hours away we got together on weekends always had a blast, sex was great, he told all his friends and family about me. Anyway, last I saw him was three weeks ago I went and stayed with him. Everything was great. He had to work the following weekend so we couldn't see each other but planned on coming to see me the next weekend. Well, no call no text email or show! I have text a couple times, left three messages and threw a couple emails in there to. Nothing! What gives? I swear he almost told me he loved me the last time I was with him?

[Tamikaze]

That is very sad to read. I can only imagine how painful it would be to have that happen. It is hard to say what happened but since you were together for only a few months and live far apart, he may have enjoyed the initial fun and spark but then found the effort to stay together was too much. Unfortunately, he may have met someone local.

Oh, and I disagree with those that say you tried too much contact. Any decent person would respond to an initial contact. That he is refusing to talk to you again and again shows me he is completely done with this and 100% afraid of any confrontation so he will not give you the courtesy of saying he does not want to see you again.

I really cannot relate to people who cannot give a call to someone they dated to just say, hey, I am sorry but I don't want to continue this. I have never gone cold on someone, even if we just went on one date. I think it is amazingly cowardly.

[candlewax]

I agree that him not getting in touch is a douchey move (assuming nothing serious happened to him while working), but her getting in touch , an estimated (guessing off what she mentioned- "couple" = 2, three messages, and a "few" emails = two, for arguments sake) 7 times within a couple of days? Seriously? A tad overkill, yes. If she's worried, it's understandable, but wow.

[Tamikaze]

Her attempts at contact did not kill the deal, it is a pretty normal reaction to what he did. I agree, it is a reaction you should fight but a lot of people make that mistake one time in their dating life and hopefully learn from it.

[candlewax]

I don't think it killed the deal either, but I'm sure it didn't help matters any. :/

[Tamikaze]

It had any effect whatsoever. Today it is mind-numbingly easy to communicate. H*ll you can send a text message while using the bathroom. This guy is an ass. (And yes, here is my disclaimer that hopefully nothing happened to him).

[candlewax]

You think he's gonna tell you that he loves you after a few months?

Maybe you're more into him than he is into you. Did he tell you that he told his friends and family about you or did you happen to hear it from them? How long has it been since you sent those messages and couple of texts?

From your info, I take it he was supposed to meet you this weekend? It's now Monday, and you've left a couple of texts, three messages, AND a few emails? Wow. A bit overkill, don't you think?

Assuming nothing happened to the guy, I can't help but think you were into him way more than he was you and he may be one of those types that just leaves without notice. Maybe you came off too clingy and he headed for the hills?

There's really not much info considering the story you gave is really one sided. :/

[roaming]

Its been three weeks now and I only called and text once the night before he was suppose to come to see what time. After the weekend I called and text one more time and only sent an email because his phone wasn't working for a while. I left one more message via phone after 2 weeks. done now. and I was with him while he talked and text his family several times so yes they knew.

[r_slizzle]

I have to agree with the other female in that you overdid it by trying to contact him so many times. He knows how to get in touch with you and will if he wants to.

Did he just tell you he told his friends and family about you? Maybe he didn't really.. I dunno. I don't know the guy. Has he ever come to see you?

The biggest problem I can see is the distance. It's one thing to continue a relationship if someone moves away, but to start a relationship out long distance would take too much work for me to want to pursue it seriously.

[roaming]

I called and text once the night before he was suppose to come to find out what time. I called and text again once after the weekend. I sent the email just in case his phone wasn't working he has problems with it off and on. I only called one more time and that was last week. its been a week and three days total since I talked to him. and yes I was with him when he talked to family members. but I do think the distance was getting to him as you pointed out and he doesn't make much money.

[jacquesvol]

MIA is a military expression: Missing In Action. (during war operations)

If he's fighting in Afghanistan to protect American interests there you can't hold a grudge if he's MIa: it'sceraily not his wish.

[roaming]

Lol, sorry, he is actually in the Coast Guard, no disrespect to you! Ok, so he is just missing

[jacquesvol]

Man over board?

[anynymoooooose]

I have no freaking idea. Honestly, are you sure he's ok? Are you sure you didn't say anything the last time you met that might have worried him?

[roaming]

Things were fine when I left! and I guess he could be dead, not funny but....... we were making plans for a trip in January and everything. I know he has money issues, doesn't make much and that bothered him?

[anynymoooooose]

Have you tried meeting him somewhere where you know he frequents? don't be a stalker lol, but if you feel like you need to know, and you go about it with dignity, it could be worth it. if it turns out ot be a disaster, who cares, you tried :)

[Anonymous]

The only possible scenarios I can think of are:

He had a girlfriend and was stringing you along

He had an ex girlfriend that he got back into contact with

His feelings for you got too strong too fast and he got scared

Let him be for a little while and play it cool. If things were as great as you say they were then I am sure he WILL call you again, I am sure of it!

[Timkingioo]

Are you feeling a bit more into him because he does this? good. because this is his intention

[roaming]

Hmmm, never thought of that? But when and does he show back up?

[Timkingioo]

If you want to counter this, maybe you should attempt to reverse the situation and make him wonder when and do you show back up

[Mary222]

Sorry, but I think he has other girlfriends.

[candlewax]

Agreed.