Do you ever feel like you don't have any REAL friends?

[pezzonovante88]

Do you ever feel like you don't have any REAL friends? People that actually care about you. I have quite a few pseudo-friends, but I don't have that special 'best' friend with whom I have a meaningful bond with. Lately, I've been kind of depressed about it because at this point in my life, it seems a little late. I always pictured having a friend or a couple of friends that I grew up with and would have always known. It just didn't work out that way. What's your opinion? Do you think it is likely to make new REAL friends? Do you think real friends even exist? I just feel so isolated from other people my age as my interests and personality traits are so different that I have trouble getting to know people in that way. :( boo hoo, huh?

Thanks :)

[bluntkrayon]

I know exactly what you're talking about. I think people use the term friend way too loosely; like they've met them at a party or a few parties, and they consider them as friends. I find it amusing though when other people say that they have many friends; when if I were to apply them to my situation / criteria for being a friend, they wouldn't even come close. That's why when I talk about friends, I put it quote marks, just to disclaim the fact that they're not really friends; they're people I know, and occasionally see at a social function, but I wouldn't trust them with my life or anything.

Sometimes you're lucky, and the people that you're "forced" to hang out with at school / college / uni, continue to make the effort to see you and catch up, outside of the forced communion. That's why I distinguish the difference between friends, acquaintances, and colleagues. I like to think I have many friends at work, but I know they're all colleagues, because they wouldn't catch up with me over the weekend, when it's not really convenient as heading down to the bar after work.

I'm in the same boat. I like many things that other people would find geekish, and would avoid at all costs. I don't drink, but I go out to bars to hang out, but I know I probably would "fit in" better with people, if I did, but I choose not to. Plus I'm getting on in years, and the social life diminishes as that keeps going.

Don't get depressed by the fact that you may not have many friends, or any friends at all. Like "ihatework" says, just consider yourself a loner; I consider myself a loner at heart. I'll make the effort to catch up with other people, but I know that very few would do the same for me.

[bunny420]

I feel the same way, people kinda seem to care, kinda not. But I have like one real best friend, and maybe one real best (girl) friend. I don't really try to stay friends with a lot of people and I guess we just drift.

It's all about how you see people and the world and how you interact though. It's really confusing but some how you need to find the way you'll be happy with yourself and life. That's my rant.. ;)

[greeneyedgal1]

I am friends with my childhood best friend, people I went to school and college with and people I have met on this site. My best friend from college has been my closest friend for 15 years. There are a couple of people I met on this site who have become close friends of mine. It is very hard for me to trust people but I trust my closer friends. I never take them for granted and reciprocate in the friendship.

I think it's never too late to meet people and make friends. It doesn't matter how old you are or your location. It's just something that you have to attempt and then it gradually builds. Understand it's what you put into it too, like making the time to talk to them, hanging out etc.

Moreover, I can honestly tell you authentic friends do exist. I have a close friend who is going through something similar to you. He is an awesome person. I always try to be supportive, caring and make time to talk to him. In addition, I have mentioned how I value his friendship and him as a person. Many people have let him down and I will be dead and buried before I do that to him.

[ambermarie]

i have a lot of friends that are more like.. I wouldn't fully trust them and out of all the thousands of people iv ever met in my life there's only 3 that I would actually trust and they are just really great people.. and NONE of them live near me :( I miss those bitches

[brunettebelle]

Right now no because college can make you lose all of your real friends. All of my friends wanted to get far from CA as possible. The others that are here are enjoying their lives.

[ihatework]

i know what you mean, I don't think too much about it tho. I guess I'm just more of a loner.

[Guslee]

i know what you mean, I have a lot of friends, but I don't have any best friends :(

[Anonymous]

I feel the same way.

I'm starting to believe that real friends don't even exist.

:(