My boyfriend left me pregnant. will he come back?

My boyfriend of 2 1/2 years left me to go and live in another state to start up his own business. he has been planning this for quite a while. he decided to go even though I fell pregnant. I am very much in love with him and miss him alot. I am feeling daunted about the future, He says he wants to be a part of the babys life but does not see a future for us. He is quite a mixed up guy and comes with a lot of emotional baggage. I know that he loves me but he is scared to commit. Do you think there is any chance of him coming back to me and giving it a go with the three of us?

looking for any advice that can be offered


Most Helpful Girl

  • I know you love him, but at the moment the baby should be the first thing on your mind. Sort that out with him first because I think at the moment he may feel overwelhmed with a child and breaking up and deciding whether to go back or not. Sort that out and from then you two may form a new bond its only natural because your parents now. Maybe from there he could see clearly how he feels about you

    • Yeah I know I need to start focusing on the pregnancy, its just that he only left a few days ago and its still a bit raw and all consuming. I hope with all my heart that he does return so we can give it a shot at being a family I think our baby is worth that, at least to say we did give it a go. Thanks for your advice , it is good to vent

    • Your welcome, it may come natural , because the pair of you will need to have a strong bond and you'll probably be spending a lot more time together. But I do stress the 'may' part for you don't know what is going to happen for certain.

What Guys Said 3

  • Hello? He said he does not see a future for the two of you. How much clearer could he be? Move on. YOu have a kid now, but some guys might still be interested in you.

    • Its not that simple really. he is a commitment phobe the future scares him he is in and out of the relationship one minute saying that he does not see a future and the next saying that he wants it to work out between us. I am going to give him space to work it all out I think that's best

    • Don't make excuses for the dude, I have friends who are single mom's because "Daddy said he was gonna come back". Your boyfriend or whatever isn't RESPONSIBLE enough to HANDLE a baby, why do you think he up and left? That ain't love. He SHOULD'VE DONE THE RIGHT THING. And the RIGHT THING would have been to MARRY YOU. The HONORABLE THING TO DO. Come on girl, f*** that guy. Your a momma now, take care of your baby and don't trip on HIS BS.

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  • It has been said, "If you love something, set it free. If it is truly yours, it will return. If it doesn't return it was never yours."

    A struggle for control between two people is often a struggle to the death. As one struggles to get free, the other struggles more intensely to control that person. The only possible soluation is for the one trying to do the controlling to set that person free, or else the relationship will be totally destroyed. How controlling are you in your relationship?

    Love in not a license to change or to control your partner. God Bless. =)

    • To be honest I have not been controlling in any way, in fact its been the opposite, he has had the power, too much I think. I am really trying not to call him at the moment because I need to maintain my own self respect but its really hard. I have never held him back from what he wants to do, in fact I have only ever encouraged him. He has stayed with me for so long completley of his own free will.

What Girls Said 8

  • It sounds like he was sure about his decision to abandon you and the baby by physically leaving to pursue his dream. He did not extend an invitation for you to join him so it doesn't sound like he's coming back for you. The guy sounds like he doesn't want to commit, not that he's scared to commit. Don't think that because you have the baby that you guys will become a family. If he wanted to be there for you, he would be there from day one. I'm sorry for your situation and I hope you will be able to work things out for the sake of the baby.

  • Your not a man cause you can make as baby, your a man cause you can raise and provide for one.

  • you break the little mofo's neck, that'd be what I'd do, sorry to hear that

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  • The best thing you can do about that girl is to leave him. Seeing his future without you is more than enough reason for you to kick him out of your life. It's so hard to live with someone who has an emotional baggage and so scared to commit. Just think about your future living with such guy. Don't focus on how you feel at this moment. Visualize your life and your baby's life with that guy. Do you think you'll be happy with him? Think about your baby having a dad like him.

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