My sister won't forgive me. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

I need help on this matter, please.

Last Sunday my older sister went on vacation and had asked me to babysit her dog (A pug) for a week, and it was no problem at all so I said yes. I took good care of her and stuck to the strict diet that my sister had made for the dog and made sure to walk her everyday after work and play with her when I can.

This past Saturday I took my sister's dog out for a walk like I do every morning before work but this time it was different. My sister's dog is very well behaved so like always I walked her without a leash on (My sister walks her like that too) and just let her run off so long as she kept remotely close to me. And, like always as soon as we get to the dog park she would run off and I'd have to eventually chase after her.

This past Saturday though, a much bigger dog (It was a mutt) chased down my sister's dog and started to attack her. I ran towards the fight as soon as I could and physically got in between the two of them. Very soon after the other dog's owner got a good hold of her own dog but my sister's dog was very badly wounded in the fight.

I took my sister's dog to the emergency pet hospital as quickly as I could but she didn't make it.

I've felt like crap and have been seriously depressed about the whole thing ever since. My sister won't talk to me at all; she won't answer her phone, reply to text messages, or even answer the door when I go to her apartment. My mom has been trying to get my sister to talk to me, she even told her how it was breaking her heart that her only daughter was not talking to her only son, and yet, she won't talk to me at all.

What should I do? I feel so terrible about everything and I don't know what to do. Will my own sister go the rest of her life without even talking to me? What would you do? Please help.

[Anonymous]

You did nothing wrong it was an accident first off. She's acting immature and imo your mom needs to stay out of it too. Just everyone back off and give her time to work through her feelings about it without pressure from all ends. Send her a card telling her you are sorry about her losing her pet and that you feel badly about it and did everything you could to save it and that you understand right now that she's grieving and hurt and that when she's ready you guys can talk about it. and then leave her alone about it she obviously isn't wanting to talk about it (she might be also blaming herself even though it's not her fault either "if I would have just told him to always leave her on her leash" ect)

do NOT get her another dog like some others suggested just let her be and she'll come around (unless she's an over the top drama queen who likes to stir up sh*t for attention and then well she might drag it around for alittle while but it's still NOT your fault as you did exactly what she would have been doing in the same situation)

hope everything works out ok

[Asker]

I sure hope so too. Thank you for the advice :)

[HungryDemon]

Tragedy hits without warning. This situation was unexpected; it's not your fault.

People need time to grieve over these types of things, despite an urge or many peoples' advice, DON'T get her a new dog. That's a situation like your dad getting remarried right after your mom dies. (YES they can be similar situations, dogs are not any less important, the feeling sometimes aren't too.) Doesn't feel good, hm? The fear returns, or a different feeling may arise. No two dogs are ever alike, you won't be able to replace her dog with another. Give her some space for now, it's the only thing you can really do. Time heals.

[Asker]

Thank you. This was runner up to best answer :)

[eos05]

Theres nothing you can do. People need time to grieve... need time to process the loss. She'll come to you when she ready.. as sad as it is.. even the loss of a pup is depressing...

the connections your making are just going to push her away, plus we women hold grudges... like crazy so let her cool off and keep your mom as the go between...

i have 6 other sisters making us 7 so I know a think or 2 about space and time..

hope this helped.

Cheers.

M

[Asker]

Thank you! That was very valuable information. I sure hope all she needs is time but, it seems like the best thing to do.

[myspacemybroke]

See that's why I don't deal with other people's living sh*t. Kids, pets, whatever. They try to make you feel obligated to take care of their sh*t, then as soon as something goes south you're just a goddam a**hole.

Your sister has no right to treat you like she is. You were going well out of your way to do her a favour under rather specific parameters that she had set herself, and some stuff went down. She can damn well get over it.

[Aizou]

give her some time to

settle her feelings..

she'll talk when she's

ready, be sure of that.. ^-^

[Nicefuture]

Leave her alone for awhile, She will get over it and forget it then get back to talk to you.

[7gnat]

I am so terribly sorry. She will forgive you but just be patient. My heart goes out to you and your family and especially the poor dog.

[ManaX]

Don't worry give it time, she'll forgive you.

[Asker]

I sure hope so. She's my own sister, I couldn't imagine the rest of my life with her hating me.

[TsubasaCorrupted]

Give her time alone to grieve. What you did was stupid yes, but it wasn't malicious and you even tried to save the poor little girl. She was her baby, give her time to grieve as a mother should.

[sweet_18]

Buy her a new dog already

[jayrex]

This answer.

[Asker]

I can't just do that :(

[sweet_18]

why not

[Asker]

She loved that dog so much; it'll be like trying to replace a child in her eyes.

[Anonymous]

Give her time, get her another dog maybe?