Is it silly to start dating if there's no physical attraction?

Here's the scoop:

A friend of mine is interested in me, and I am interested in him. The only problem is that I have absolutely zero interest in being physical with him. It's strange; I used to find him attractive, but whenever I am around him these days I feel relieved that I never let anything escalate to a physical level. Bad sign, right? Oddly enough, though, I still "like" him. I want to be around him, and like hanging out with him, but feel like making out, etc. would be super awkward and not enjoyable. I don't know what to do. I want to express that his feelings are reciprocated, but then I don't want to insult him by not wanting to do anything with him because of the lack of attraction. Gah! Should I just keep it strictly platonic?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Isn't what you describe -- hanging out but no physical contact -- the definition of a platonic friendship? What do you want to change it? I mean, the "more" you might want would be the physical contact, right?... but you don't want it.

    So if he is interested in you, and wants more, than you have to be honest with him... doing anything otherwise would be leading him on and wouldn't be fair to him at all.

    It may be difficult for him to hear, and you may lose his friendship -- it can be difficult for a guy to be friends with a girl when he is attracted to her.

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What Guys Said 2

  • What exactly about his physical features that make you not physically attracted to him? or is it just summin you can't really explain?

    But I have heard of people who get involved and sumhow gradually become physically attracted to the person.

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  • If your not somewhat attracted to a person physically, then there's little reason to pursue a romantic relationship with that person. It might sound harsh, but it's the truth. If your not attracted, then there's hardly any incentive.

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What Girls Said 4

  • its not silly at all! if I were you, I would try it out too. there's a chance you can GROW to like him, or even better if it DOESNT WORK OUT, you can gain a best friend out of it! A man best friend is great! You get their manly perspectives, and help with other guys. lol its not all about looks. "its what's on the inside that counts"

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  • sounds more like a good buddy

    than a lover...

    if you have to force yourself to be with this person physically [if and when the time comes up]

    then I don't think that's very good on both your ends.

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  • Well yes I think so because there is always 2 parts to a relationship one being the physical one and the other being the emotional part and if you have one and not the other then I think you could have potential problems dating him or her.

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  • Yeh you should, recently I thought this guy was hot but then I got to know him and I stopped thinking he was hot, I still enjoyed being around him and stuff but I just had no feelings for him like that and he wanted something to happen and for me it would have just been weird. I don't see how anyone can date anyone they aren't physically attracted to. It wouldn't work-it means you only like him as a friend.

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