If a guy keeps telling me he likes my intelligence...does that mean he doesn't think I am all that pretty?

[Anonymous]

This guy keeps telling me how intelligent he thinks I am and how impressed with that he is. He has told me he thinks I am beautiful once and said that he is very attracted to me also, but mostly he just comments on my intelligence. He has had a lot of girlfriends and so I don't know if he thinks intelligence is just a rare quality or he is just telling me that because he doesn't think I am all that pretty so he doesn't want to say too much in that area? Is it better to comment all the time on someone's looks or their intellectual ability?

[backlash]

It's a compliment, and he obviously enjoys your company, so you have to take that into consideration. For me, looks can start a relationship, but it takes intelligence and maturity to keep the relationship going. Also, some guys feel uncomfortable complimenting others on their beauty (go figure), so that's another possible issue.

There's a good chance that he believes that he's paying you a great compliment; intelligent women are much more fun to spend time with than empty-headed women! But, if it's really getting to you, try confronting him about it. Watch his eyes and facial expressions to tell if he's being sincere or not.

[deadwait]

It generally means exactly what is said. I for one love intelligent girls - I'll take a smart girl with a few minor flaws then an air head with a media defined "super hawt bod" any day of the week. When its all said and done, do you want to talk to a wall or a person that you can expand your ideas with?

However, what do you mean by:

"He has had a lot of girlfriends"

Is he vary "fashionable and flamboyant"? How do you know he's straight?

[Asker]

LOL It is funny you should ask that because he does do a few things that have made me wonder. I do know for a fact that he is attracted to women and I know some people that he has had sex with, but he also does things like he takes longer to get ready than I do, works out with a personal trainer, and plays the piano. Hmmm.

[deadwait]

See, the reason I ask is, if he's had "A Lot" of girlfriends - like a new girl every week or two - he may not really be straight, a couple guys from my pre-21 days that were like that - I've been running into them recently, and they are with their boyfriends - and one of them, I guess you could call him a 300+ female sex partner guy, now only dates chicks with bulges in their skirt - if you catch my drift - however, I do live in San Francisco - so ya know, its different here.

[ALWAYSclassy]

If a guy has dated a lot of girls, then he probably has a lot of options. I don't think a guy like that would date a girl he found unattractive.

Guys respect and are impressed by smart girls. If all he talked about were your looks, that would basically mean that's either all he's focusing on or looks are all you have - so he's really giving you a high compliment. =)

[answerful-aly]

He probably doesn't know what to say your smart but you are pretty but he likes the brains more then the looks which is great. Most girls want a guy like that your lucky soak it up. But if it still bugs you talk to him. He might just say your brains are better than beauty.

[steven4767]

Well I think he is very attracted to you. Sometimes guys don't want to say they like you for your looks because that might come across as shallow. If he compliments you on other traits like personality or intelligence then I think that means that he really wants to get to know you on a more personal level. He is letting you know that he thinks you are pretty but he wants you to know that he sees you as more than just a piece of ace :)