This is kind of long, but I promise, very interesting and fun.
- Yoga instructor
- Guy in my yoga class
The way the school works is that customers can register for classes on their own schedule. He showed up during my weekly beginner's class.
- He showed up to my weekday class
- I asked everyone to share their names
- I made up an excuse to ask him what he did
- While teaching class, I was constantly looking at him and gazing into his eyes for like 3-5 seconds each time and smiling
- He was smiling back, but not in a shy way
- He's confident, but not arrogant or cocky, just easy-going and secure
- He's obviously really cute
- I kept finding excuses to touch him during class and help him adjust his posture or stand on top of him and use my hips to adjust his hips instead of just telling him what to do like I do to everyone else.
- I did some snooping
- Turns out he's been to more classes than just my class
- He's been to other female instructors more than once
- He's registered for 3 more upcoming classes with the same female instructor; even though she's older, married and with children and says so on her profile on the website
- He's bought his own yoga mat, towels and blocks in our store, and considering his history of classes and how serious he was in class, I know he's not just one of those guys who takes a yoga class or two looking to meet cute girls.
- I don't know how old he is. He's probably in his mid-20's. But he seems very focused, mature and professional. How realistic is it of me to expect a guy with manners to make a move on me as his instructor?
- I don't even know if he has a girlfriend, is married, or w/e. I also don't want to make a fool of myself in my own class.
What do you think I should do?
- Wait for him to make the move and ask you out.Vote A
- Wait for him to give you some signs that he's interested.Vote B
- Give him some more signs that you're interested.Vote C
- Ask him out after his next class is over.Vote D
- Don't do anything, the universe will magically take care of it.Vote E
Most Helpful Guy
First of all,
I take yoga, and I'm not gay.
Second of all,
I'm not any good at it yet, but I'm making an honest effort.
Joining yoga to meet girls? Seriously now? If the guy was ugly, I could understand being iffy on his motives for being there. But if he's not only "not ugly", but "cute" or "hot", I think you can safely rule that one out. As a guy, I know people who go to yoga go there to relax, stay fit, and get in touch with their spiritual self. The last thing anyone wants is some creepy guy ruining that experience by coming up to you and hitting on you. And as a guy, believe me, it would take some greater cosmic power to get me to ruin the good energy in that environment.
My longest relationship was with an Indian girl, and I've practiced (and continue to practice) martial arts. So I actually have to suck it up and fight the "he must be gay because he goes to yoga" stereotype that affects me as a man; just so I can show up to yoga. Believe me, I wouldn't do that unless I could care less what people think and more about getting in touch with my spiritual self and reaching a state of perfect awareness & balance between my body and mind.
Now to the crux;
Guys like this don't respond to you as a woman, the way you are probably used to other men responding to you.
It's called the Adonis complex, a form of narcissistic personality disorder (or "type-A" personality). Men who constantly push themselves higher, in education, in their career, in learning, in understanding, with their bodies, with everything. The thing that holds the least weight in their life is sex and women. No. They're not homosexual or asexual. These are heterosexual men; like Adonis. They simply see sex and women as a distraction and waste of time that would take away from achieving MORE in this lifetime.
Guys like this are perfectly aware of your interest in them. He probably caught on, and politely but subtly communicated to you through his gaze/eyes/look that he also likes you (otherwise, he would blatantly ignore you or not be as receptive or friendly) but that he just wants to focus on yoga.
If you want to give it a try, then approach him outside the class-room. You don't have to ask him out. All you have to do is establish contact outside the class. That communicates to him that you want to take your interaction with him outside the class-room! If he also wants the same, he'll have no problem asking you to join him for a drink or lunch. If he doesn't want the same, he'll just talk to you and keep it friendly.
Don't beat a dead horse!
"Type-A's" are very sharp. He doesn't need reassurance, he doesn't need MORE signs or hints from you. The gesture of you voluntarily creating an interaction b/w you and him OUTSIDE the classroom speaks volumes to these guys. If you've done your fair share and part in this and he's not putting out; then just let it go. Don't take it personally, because maybe he's not interested in ANYONE right now!0
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