This may seem like an odd question. I get how we all want to be accepted and appreciated.
I've been reading lots of discussions here and many of them are from girls who want to know whether a guy likes her or thinks she is hot. I feel for them. I know how it is to be really dependent on what others think of me. I remember being bullied as a kid and thinking "why do they hate me?" and internalizing it as "there must be something wrong with me". And then I woke up to the fact that "OH, maybe there's something wrong with THEM!" And since then, I haven't given much of a sh*t about what asshole guys think of me. I seek the respect of people who show me respect, not from people who show me disrespect.
It breaks my heart to see so many girls adjusting their appearance, their ways of being, their sexual behavior, based on what sexist dudes want from them. And, I know plenty of women who don't. So I'm not meaning to imply, in any way, that this is something "all" girls or even "most" girls do. I'm wanting to learn from you on this.
Any insights into this? Do you feel like you need to modify yourself in any way for guys who don't respect women? To what extent is your self-esteem bound to what guys think of you, if at all? Do you feel you have a healthy respect for yourself? And if a sexist guy wants you to change who you are, what do you tell him, or what do you do?
- I don't care what guys think of me. I determine my own self-worth.Vote A
- I care far too much about what guys think of me. And I'm too willing to change me to suit them.Vote B
Most Helpful Girl
I voted "A" and my reasoning behind it is pretty simple to me. I think that most of us have experienced the feeling of not looking as good as another, dressing as nice, having as much money, being in the popular crowd, etc. But as I grew, I have realized that "I love me". There is only one of me and with every nice body, beautiful face and wealth that is here on earth is the same amount of pain distributed.
I have two daughters (14 & 18) and one of the best qualities that they would say I have is the ability to "Be Me". I cherish the fact that I have been able to secure that trait in both of them. We are all unique in our own way and a lot of times, the very thing that we don't like about ourselves is the very thing that our boy/girl friends likes the most.
By loving who I am and being myself regardless of what people think has cleared open roads for me that I would've never been able to stroll without having the complete confidence of self. It allows you to manage your life better, filter out the weeds of those who pretend to be your friend, find true love, stay stress free, smile everyday, stay positive, make wiser decisions, feel confident about your surroundings...ect.
Caring and trusting yourself enough to know that "you"are the only "you"out there. The most beautiful understanding of self worth there is. And when you have that inside, you attract it causing a universal effect amongst those whom are inside your inner circle, effectively hindering most negative transactions. By accepting yourself as a whole is the start of more than just thinking...Wow, I look good. It actually goes to the core of your existence. Loving and accepting yourself is a very positive source which leads deep into your soul. So, do I give a sh*t about what any man think of how I look...Hell 2 da Naw!2