"Not my type..."

I'm a 21 year old, 6'0", overweight, yet muscular guy. Most think I'm a decent looking , and some think I look like a bigger built Antonio Benderas (sp?). But anyway, I need an honest opinion from the ladies please.

Really, how many girls think like guys when it comes to physical attraction? I mean, from what I used to think is that ONLY men look at the physical attributes of a girl first, and then get to know her character later.

I'm very personable, comfortable to be around with, funny, very intelligent, and down-to-earth. What I keep noticing is that because of me not being under the 'really cute' or 'really hot' category (instead I fall into the "ugh... he's fat" or "definitely [physically] not my type), I don't really have the chance that the other guys do. All because of looks alone!

Is that really true? or do I need to see this in a different light? Please, I need brutal honesty with no sugar coating. So please let me know!

Also, every girl I've had a relationship with (I've had 3 total) have told me that I've been the best boyfriend I've had by far. The reason for the break-ups was because they said that they weren't good enough for me so they end up break up with me...


Most Helpful Girl

  • Yeah there has to be some attraction,eyes,body,face...SOMETHING. The way I see it is "if you can't picture yourself kissing that person,than you can't picture yourself dating that person" .I wouldn't blame someone for not being attracted to me,because we all like certain things some blue eyes some brown,some tall some short...it all goes along with that TASTE.I dated a guy I wasn't at all attacted to ONCE and it blew up in my face,because I broke his heart,i lied to myself thinking the inside was all I needed,but now I relize the truth (at least for me) is that you gotta feel something when you look at them and communicate with them.Shallow or not,its how I feel.You don't seem unnatractive, fat can be lost,ugly cant...so that shouldnt prevent you from finding someone that excepts you for YOU.Goodluck!

    • So if I'm understanding this right, personality/character is secondary to physical attributes? Can it overshadow the latter at times? or is that something that cannot be 'broken through'?

What Girls Said 4

  • Yes, girls look at guys looks. I know that I used to do it... most attractive females don't want to be with an un-attractive male, but there are some that do look at the personality too... they are just harder to find. and usually when someone [[guys included]] say that they aren't good enough for who ever they are with then breaks up with them, isn't usually the real reason why someone is breaking up with you... but I wish you luck on finding a good down to earth girl, there's not many of us out there these days... I probably wouldn't be with my boyfriend if I was just looking at his looks.

  • I would say some girls are very judgmental like that. There are some who aren't as superficial. Its really just dependent on the individual. However, physical attraction usually has a lot to do with whether or not a girl will want to date you. Just keep in mind everyone has a different perception of what's hot and what's not. I personally prefer the larger guys, they don't take you for granted and most often treat a girl better than the "really hot" guys.

  • most girls are just as superficial as guys. sorry :-/

  • well I care about the guys character but physical attraction means something to me too. I try to be as attractive as possible so honestly I don't want to be with a guy who isn't on my level. one thing I have noticed is that the more attractive a girl is, the more options in guys she has and the more we expect you to be attractive to. now the less attractive girls are going to be less picky. if you are into really hot category girls then it would help that you would be really hot as well. if you look like a bigger antonio banderas then I can say you would probably be an Adonis once you get down to a good weight.


What Guys Said 0

No guys shared opinions.