Too much of a tomboy, not enough of a girly girl?

I'm a tomboy and love playing (tackle) football (none of that two hand touch crap), hunting, mudding, and just hanging out with the guys. I hate wearing dresses or skirts on a normal basis and refuse to wear make-up but when I clean up I go all out. The thing is I kinda fell for my best friend and I think he's seen me acting like a guy too much and not enough of me acting like a girl. He's seen me in a dress or skirt a total of four times and is always shocked. Is this a problem? What can I do to show him I'm not just one of the guys?

Updates:
I'm not wearing the skirt for him. My mom makes me wear skirts to church and he's only seen me in a dress once for his sister's graduation. I'm not changing who I am for him (or any other guy). I just wanna show him I'm a girl he might wanna date.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • First off what your doing isn't " acting like a guy" it's acting like YOU. Harmful stereotypes of "masculine" and "feminine" are FAKE . What is called masculine and feminine are traits ANYONE could have ANYONE. NEVER EVER EVER fall for that garbage of "women do this and men do that" it' s LIE and had ruined peoples lives for years. If I knew a girl like you that was doing all kind of stuff, being active being using her brain and engaging in all sorts of independent actions I would be proud of her. If I saw her in a dress acting like a girly girl I would be sad and upset at the rape of her personality by a degenerate society. Never give in to those disgusting stereotypes their wrong and they hurt people. Here's a good link www.feministing.com ask the women their what they think, do some reading also, I think you will find it very enlightening.

    Girly girls contribute very little to society they likely cost millions in lost productivity. My sister has had a lot of trouble with them on the job because they refuse to do their work instead seeking out men to do things for them that they are being paid to do themselves. These women harass men who are feminist and none conforming as well and they fight against equality for women. Why would you ever want to act like them?

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What Guys Said 6

  • When you are with a group of people dress up like a tomboy and be yourself and when alone with him dress up in girly fashion and be yourself and he will wonder what it all means. Guys are basic like that and enjoy knowing that when it comes to them you are willing to show a side of you you do not other men ! :)

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  • because he sees you as just one of the guys and then BAM. with the dress all of a sudden you're a girl. so its odd because you have changed your identity on the outside.

    you can't really get around that... put him in a headlock while wearing your dress.

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  • As him him out and then dress all out hot and sexy heels and a tight short little black dress and let your hair down.that will make him trip on his words and just wanna give you his undivided attention.Oh and when the night is over and you wanna give him something to go crazy about when he gets home tell him,Oh just so you know I wasn't wearing any panties.

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  • Wear the tougher clothing you like just tighter. let him see that you don't wear the same underwear as he does to. If a guy knows that you are still girl on the deeper levels that's all that matters. I personally love a girl who likes the fun things in life so long as she is still wearing sexy jeans and reminds me that she is a girl now and then.

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  • well, I wouldn't change any thing I'd ask you out in a split seconed don't change for him. you are beautiful I think.

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  • Well apart from showing him the obvious, he has to see you as a romantic parnter, no use in trying to be something you are not, if you are happy being a tomboy, that is who you are, you can try and let him know how you feel, flirting, teasing, playing games, touch, etc look at how he reacts to you, give him time to think about it, he might come around, If you do become a couple or just hook up, think about what your relationship will be if you break up can you still be friends, or will that make it weird. Telling someone straight out without giving warning can also be a shock, so need to flirt and hint at the possiblity of a relationship create tension. He will either feel the same way or he wont. All you can do is try, if not move on find someone else who would be interested in you. I like the tomboy thing so it can happen.

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What Girls Said 6

  • As a tomboy with a wonderful boyfriend, I have to say your tomboyish nature won't interfere with your ability to find a good man provided you are happy with yourself, something a guy cares far more about than how you dress. That said, make sure to give him opportunities to be there for you. Don't try to take on everything by yourself. If he wants to help you carry something or build something or fix anything, let him. Don't let him feel like he doesn't have a place in your life, obviously any help is appreciated. Let him know when he does things you like that are thoughtful and be supportive and encouraging as you should be with any partner. Don't try to be someone else to win him over or impress him. Be the best version of yourself you can be by being true to yourself and caring about yourself. Guys like girls with positive attitudes and strong self esteems.

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  • just be what you want to be. a true tom boy won't dress in a skirt. there's this girl in my class who wears just pants every class. and her hair is short, and she talks like a guy too so yeah...

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  • i have the same problem because I don't like wearing skirts or dresses (think I don't own does) I even dress like a guy at church, but my guy friend take me like a sis sometimes because we mostly plays rough with me and he thinks it funny when he picture me wearing a dress. But you shold not let that happen to you just be yourself

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  • I'm the same way. A guy should appreciate you for who you are and the way you are. I love my carhartts and chippewa boots, I hate wearing dresses and make up,i love getting dirty and my boyfriend loves me for me. If a guy can't do the same for you, he's a waste of your time (sort of like make up and dresses )! Just talk to him and show him you really care! Cook him his favorite food or do something for him that you know he will love!

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  • talk about a guy you kinda think is cute in front of your friends and him. include girl though. Don't say it to the guys. Have a private conversation with the gals. He will hear and maybe become jealous. Or who knows he might like you the way you are but if you want to change Ur appearance, then change little stuff day by day and see how he reacts. If he makes comments like "oh I liked the way you looked or this is better, then you will know it's a heads up or down.

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  • seems like you aleady made some kind of impact on him

    by wearing the dress.

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    • I didn't wear it for him or anything he just came over as I was getting home from church and hadn't changed yet. He just looked at me like I was crazy or something. When I told him I was going to change, he seemed relieved. Then we played football and everything was normal again. So it's just like he didn't know I owned a dress or something. (Most people don't believe me when I say I own dresses and skirts.)

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