I posted a photo of myself and the responses only brought my self esteem down lower. Why did I do this? How to get over it?

I posted a picture of myself on Reddit to get opinions. I figured people would comment on my nose and how big it is but I didn't expect things to get so nasty. I got rated a three, I should get a nose job, I may eventually find someone who will get over my looks if I don't get surgery. I've always had self esteem issues but my confidence has gotten better now that I'm older. I didn't feel so bad about having a bigger nose. Overall it fits my face and I think I'm cute with someone needs body. Since then I haven't felt as confident. The Internet is full of nasty people but I can't help to think as what they said was true. I don't keep men around long and once they do move on its with a woman who looks way better than I ever could. No one asks me out on dates. People I have dated never wanted to be together in public. I got rated the ugliest in my friend group.

I wear flattering clothes, do my makeup and hair and keep my eyebrows and nails done. I don't have money for a nose job. All I can do it work on my confidence but at the end of the day I'm still unhappy with my looks.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Ay girl, don't you even sweat what people over the internet are sayin' about you. Who gives a shit what people think about you. Especially people over the Internet. You probably bein' way too hard on yourself. The only thing that might make you unattractive is if you walk around with that state of mind. The better you feel about yourself, and the more confident you are in how you look, the better it looks to other people too. Walking around knowing you look good.. It changes the way you look, literally. So put on ya finest clothes, doll up that face, and strutt ya stuff. You gon' kill it girl.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Oh hun, it's the internet, those really nasty people may have not thought you were super pretty, but instead of saying "Not my type" they will say the worst just to hurt you.

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What Guys Said 9

  • You have to expect that if you put a photo online you will receive all kinds of opinions, many of which you don't want. However, you also have to be aware that not all opinions will be objective or anything close. There are a whole load of embittered people out there who hide behind internet anonimity to vent their frustrations and inadequacies. They will deliberately say hurtful things just to make their tiny, powerless lives feel more empowered for a few moments. You need to be able to weed out abuse and focus only on constructive feedback and constructive criticism. Abuse is never constructive, therefore it can be entirely disregarded.

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  • Firstly stop asking random people to rate you, yeah sure you can be insecure but you shouldn't leave it up to other people to give you security, it should come from within. Look at yourself in the mirror, adjust your hair, put makeup on whatever you're into and tell yourself you're beautiful and believe it. Who gives a fuck what other people think, half the people on Reddit are just doing it to mess with you.

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  • They were just giving their honest opinion. If you didn't want it you shouldn't have asked for it (why I don't put my pics on the internet, I know I look like shit, don't need anyone else to remind me). I'm ugly as well, my solution is just stay indoors and play The Sims 4 instead of bother with real life. If you are truly hideous (to the point that only a dog would kiss you and only after you rubbed your face with a pork chop) then just avoid public during daylight (I mostly ddo my shopping at 3am, even though I hate cold weather) and get some hobbies besides offline social interaction (online no pic is needed). That's worked for me for the past 30 or so years, confidence/self-esteem is overrated anyway.

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  • If you posted on r/rateme, they seem to be gentle but honest, if you posted on r/roastme of course they are gonna trash talk your nose.

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    • I posted on r/amiugly

    • You should have posted on r/rateme, i feel like posting in r/amiugly predisposes people to think you are ugly regardless if you are not. Try on r/rateme and see the difference yourself.

  • You need to remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I think whenever you try to get too many people to like how you look, your cruising into dangerous waters. I'm a guy and yet I'm very careful who I show my pictures too. Because I know from experience that some people have called me "ugly" and it doesn't feel good when that happens.

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  • seriously? you posted it on reddit. the place notorious for over analysis and confidence crushing comments. the place where every person who posts a pic there gets their ass chewed by hundreds of guys on computers who would just love to break you.

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  • That's probably one of the worst places to ask for opinions. And you should stop caring about what people think

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  • Pics?

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  • You should learn to not give a f**k!

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What Girls Said 1

  • Stop with those rating things. Just don't listen to people on the internet. Not worth it!

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