Am I too picky and how can I change?

Does it sound too ridiculous to not go out with someone because you don't like his hair? Is that too picky. I just met this guy yesterday and he's cute and nice but I don't like his hair. It sounds silly as I'm writing it. It's like I have this pattern. If I first met a guy (not if we're friends first) and he's not ideal I pick him apart. If he's gorgeous I get intimidated and think he might not be interested. So how can I change my pattern, and is the hair thing at all justifiable?

I want to thank you guys for the brutal honesty. The truth is I always try to push people away. I don't know why I put up these walls then make excuses- he's too good or not good enough. it has nothing to do with the guys really. It's me. thanks


Most Helpful Guy

  • I have to honestly say sorry but, I find it totally unjustifiable and shallow! Unless the guy has issues with hair cleanliness or grooming or whatnot. A person is more than just a hairstyle or what other parameters you have come up with.

    Unless of course if you are talking about mohawk style or he has shaved half his head while the other half is long, or whatever weirdo/creepy style he has decided is cool.

    Otherwise I believe this line of thought is what keeps you intimidated. You have set these standards with other people for yourself, so now when you meet someone who might be up to your standards, subconsciously you are scared that they are picking you apart too.


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What Guys Said 1

  • speaking as a single guy, if a cute gal was serious about dating me and all that stopped her from going forward was "hair" it can be shaved and cut, if she dumps me, it can grow back.its not like a tattoo!

    hell, it would be fun if a woman did the shaving or cutting if she was into it.


What Girls Said 1

  • Personally it goes beyond the hair. Did you ever see Shallow Hal? The part where his friend picks apart women. It sounds to me as though you are deflecting your self esteem issues. It's normal to get a bit twitterpeated when you first meet a man you like. Hair is not that big of a deal. It's hair. How would you feel if some guy didn't date you because he didn't like your hair? Can I ask you a question? Do you ever date guys that are nice and on book are great but get bored and think, I could do better?