Ill admit it right now, I like men and my man has to hot.
If he's not hot then I don't want him and I refuse to date him.
Yes.. I'm shallow.
And yet some people on here say that "oh he has to have ambition otherwise I won't date him."
That to me means if you won't date a man simply because he doesn't posses one attribute... that makes you shallow.
If a man comes on here and says "ill only date women with C cup boobs!" Its my "MINIMUM REQUIREMENT" Than he's no better than a man who only wants women for one thing.. also known as SEX.
Hes no better than a woman who wants a man ONLY for one thing, called MONEY.
(Now this is a disclaimer, not all people are shallow. Not ALL people are shallow... NOT ALL PEOPLE ARE SHALLOW.)
NOT ALL PEOPLE ARE SHALLOW.. NOT ALL NOT ALL.
(its a generalization of course.)
That being said I'm not talking about that. the problem I have is with people that say "ill only date someone if they have "THIS" or "THAT" and if they don't then I won't date them. And then they turn around and say that if they do then they will.
Either you are open minded to having someone with any traits or you are not.
Would you call someone open minded if they said they absolutely would not date a woman unless she had blond hair?
I don't think you would.
I would like to add this is not about preference. Preference suggests more of an open mind. What I'm talking about is "exclusivity". If you exclude every woman that doesn't have blond hair, you are shallow.
We all have a "shallow" and a deeper side to us. The shallow part acts solely on sexual instinct, whereas another part of us wants to be with someone whose personality is compatible to ours.
I think most people have a limit when it comes to their partner's looks. My partner doesn't have to be hot, but I don't see myself dating a fat guy or an ugly guy either. Sex is important to me, and I don't think I could enjoy it with someone I wasn't the least bit attracted to.
The problem with people who date only "hot guys" or girls with a C-cup is, in my opinion, that they let themselves be led too much by their shallow side. For a while it's nice to be with someone who is extremely attractive to you, but once the initial thrill fades, you may start noticing you're really not that compatible as a couple. I think this is one of the reasons why so many celebrity couples split up. You may be lucky and find someone you consider very hot who's also a great match for you, but you may also find that your high requirements in the looks department will cause you to end up alone.
I know someone that won't eat nuts. A friend won't eat potatoes since that's considered a "poor man's food". Or will only have Coach bags, wear only Prada.
Yet, suprisingly, a man (or woman) on the street with nothing will accept almost anything.
I would say someone is shallow primarily on judging someone or something on its "book cover". In a way we all are quick to assumptions.
So if we all are shallow, and therefore flawd creatures, don't we in some way look to better ourselves and redeem ourselves through actions of humility and self sacrafice (donations, etc.)
Because people do like to admit they are doing anything that is wrong.
Being shallow is considered negative. Just like not many people would openly admit "I'm desperate" "I'm mean spirited" "I'm racist" people usually want to justify themselves, it makes them feel better and look better to others.
I don't think there is anything wrong with exclusivity, that doesn't make you shallow. It depends what you're being exclusive about. But even if you were shallow, as long as you're not being rude to someone or leading them on that's your business.
I don't view it as shallow to not want a guy who lacks ambition. If you're trying to be in a possible long term relationship that is something that matters. Is a woman really shallow for not wanting a guy who's going to be lazy and stagnant and doesn't want to aspire to better than what he is right now? You gotta have some standards.
I wouldn't date a guy that's ugly. So by your definitions if a guy had all the other positive attributes except for good looks, I'm shallow because I don't want to date him? Um, I don't consider that shallow but then again shallow isn't really a dirty word so I'll take it I guess lmao. I just can't imagine myself having sex and being intimate with a guy I am not physically turned on by.
Every person has a preference and anyone who says they don't is not being genuine. I wouldn't say it makes a person shallow. We all have our preferences whether it be food, friends or dates.
I would never date someone with too much baggage from a past relationship, kids or mental issues. I would also be far less likely to date people from certain religions I disagree with.
For physical shallowness, blonds have to in general be "better looking" for me to consider them equally attractive to a dark haired girl; and I would probably never date an amputee or someone very physically handicapped.
So wait, you're shallow AND gay ? man what a combo, hahahahahahaha