I absolutely HATE body modifications such as facial/body piercings, tattoos, and even stuff as small as hair dye jobs or hitting the tanning booth. When girls do these things it just totally turns me off because I think it's ugly, it's trashy, and it's just disgusting. But they're all becoming so common nowadays it seems like it's impossible to find a girl who doesn't do these things. Do I need to adapt my standards and try to force myself to like these things that are major turnoffs to me if I am to find a woman in the modern world?
Ok, so obviously the Anon two comments down took offense to your question. * someone call the waambulance*
I don't think you should lower your standards because you prefer a girl that is hard to come by.
I think you have every right to have standards, from my perspective its more complimenting.
I'm a girl, obviously, and the only make up I wear is mascara, and that's only on a special day.
I agree with you about body tanning, and hair dying and stuff. :) <- never done that stuff in my life..
Chances are there ARE more girls than you think out there that do not do that stuff. You are probably just looking at the wrong kind of girls, i.e your friends are into girls like that, but your not feelin it, yet it may not be so easy NOT to notice them
To the Anon:
Just because a girl does not wear makeup and tan and dye their hair or whatever sh*t that you do that obviously caused you to become offended, it DOES NOT mean their ugly, fat or whatever.
9 times out of 10 those girls are full of confidence, though they may not boast, that or they have better things to concentrate on.
First, I don't think your wrong- but your statement is biased. Most girls do these things because they are influenced by what the media convinces them looks good, or bullying. For example, I dyed my hair because a group of guys told me my natural hair color was gross (dusty brown.).
You shouldn't call a girl trashy because she has a belly button piercing, or a tattoo for example. There is usually a reason why they have this body modification. When my friends father died, she got a tattoo of a quote from him that she held dear to her. Would you call her trashy?
I have to agree with you on the piercings. A lot of people go overboard with them, and it does sometimes look trashy. But I don't think you should be so biased with your opinion. Does that mean you can't find a girl that won't have any of these? No. There are plenty out there who share your views. But be a little more open minded, cause what if someday you fall in love with a girl who then dyes her hair or gets a tattoo? Would you suddenly hate her?
I wonder if your dislike for 'body mods' extend as far as even disliking makeup, plucking eyebrows, shaving legs, etc. All of which are pretty unnatural in my opinion.
Unfortunatly for us women there is a lot of pressure to look good, young, tanned, etc, something which guys really are not expected to do. If you grow a beard it's considered normal, if I let my armpit hair grow wild... it's considered disgusting and mannish.
Of course if people are excessive with their mahogany tan and peroxide hair, then yeah, it is a little trashy.. but in moderation it makes women confident, happy and expressive individuals.
And you probably walk past hundreds of versions of your 'ideal' girl every week, unfortunately she's so boring you probably don't notice.
so many girls do this because so many guys fine it extremely attractive, small thing like colouring hair it can look very nice, and to be honest I'm sure you have found a girl attractive that has dyed her hair or even used a tanning bed, girls can do all these things and not look like it and I think its a bit rough to rule out being with a girl that does any of those things even if they can look natural.
I actually don't like modifications either, I think natural is just beautiful :)
Guys do it too. If you don't like it then fine. NOt a problem
Either adapt or date one of those really conservative Christian/religious girls because most girls do it. You would be hard pressed to find a girl that doesn't dye/highlight/straighten her hair, wear makeup, or tan or do any of those above. Do you also have a problem with them waxing their eyebrows and other body hair? Or grooming? What about body modifications is so disgusting to you? Most women are going to try to do things that make them look better that's just the way it is. Lemme guess you're one of those guys who wants a girl to have naturally perfect flawless skin and beautiful hair without having to use anything to do it, you want her to wake up and be naturally gorgeous? Well lemme tell you that is pretty unrealistic and your chances of finding girls like that to choose from aren't that high. :/
Most girls who don't do any type of body modifications (not talking about piercings, tattoos, ear stretching, that type of stuff) at all, are usually...um...not the most attractive girls. They usually have a boring humdrum look and blend in and don't stand out among the more attractive girls. So if you really hate "body modifications" hopefully you prefer these kind of girls, and you weren't fantasizing about a gorgeous hot girl because most of them do "body modifications" to some degree.
Most people who do dye their hair don't even do it from low self esteem if that's what you're going for. Some people like to try different looks and express themselves through makeup/hair. But if you don't like it that's your opinion but most girls do it in some form. So either get over it or you'll be severely limiting your dating options.
I don't have any tattoos or peircings (not even my ears). Its not that I wouldn't like them, I just don't think they'd suit me, so their are some girls out there who don't do that. hair dye on the other hand I think your gonna have trouble finding a girl who doesn't have some form of dye. Stop being so fussy, fair enough tattoos and peircings you don't like, but hair dye?! You wouldn't even notice tht a chick dyed her hair half the time if she didn't tell you. Your picky to the point where you sound impossible to please, I can't imgine what you'd be like in other aspects of your life.
no way! you may need to move to the mountains but no definitely do not lower your standards to find a girl because if you have to force yourself to like a girl that's pointless because in your heart (bear with me) you won't truly like her you'll just be finding things wrong with her
It's also more common for women to act like sluts (not meaning they're comfortable with their sexuality, but meaning they go to clubs and pick up another guy to f*** every weekend).
I don't blame you for being torn on this, because I hate social constructions so I don't follow trends or fashion or any of the other things people slavishly change about their person to fit in. This leaves me "unattractive" because I'm not the hipster girls our age jump on top of. But honestly, if I had to choose between being who I want to be alone, and being fake to score chicks... I'd rather be alone.
There are chicks out there that have no body modifications, tats, or even tan. My girlfriend doesn't have any of those and she's hot as hell, and in fact I can't recall one chick that I have dated that had any tats, piercings except ears, or tanned. I only date classy women
Well, firstly I am similar to you - I prefer a natural looking woman with no makeup, dye, piercings, fake tan etc. Nothing beats looking into the eyes of a beautiful looking woman who doesn't need any of that to be physically beautiful. Maybe its because they are few and far between nowadays.
Your standards are your standards. You shouldn't 'force' yourself to find them attractive, but rather maybe keep an open mind, get to know some of these women and find out what they are like. Maybe start with women that only have 1 of those 'body modifications'. From there it might not bother you or turn you off as much
I actually agree with you to some extent. Facial piercings are just weird, and most tattoos are dumb, unless they have some sort of deep meaning. The hair dye is what really gets me. The fact that so many women dye their hair makes me wonder if any of them are actually happy with who they really are.
In a lot of ways I feel the same way as you do, I mean its as though id dismiss someone who did have these modifications, its just that id prefer neither of them I like natural women the best :P. I don't really get the attraction that comes from piercings, its likely a form of bling you could probably say haha, but to an extent it seems that the popularity is due to trends. The 1970's, 80's and 90's all had different interpretations of what they considered attractive that they tried to feed women and many of which followed the images being portrayed, its likely similar today in the form of many of the body modifications you listed. I'm sure the amount of women that are interested in many of the changes to their body would change if media impressions begin to change but for the time being I don't see it...
I don't like make up on women so much, neither do I like tattoos or piercings and tanning booths, if they wanted to tan it would be better if they tanned naturally however, all of this despite being a bit of a turn off wouldn't exactly mean id dissmiss someone just because of it. I could look past it if it was the right girl and I think you should to, I think you might need to be a little more leniant though, at least try to accept a few changes because otherwise its going to be pretty hard.
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