Why is he attracted NOW?

Okay I'm just going to spit it out.

My teacher and I share so much in common & click on a personal level, and he used to just want to help boost my confidence, etc. (when I was 14 and awkward), but ever since I turned 16 (I'm 17 now), we've begun flirting. and it's more awkward between us. and the eye contact is intense and obvious (never in class, always alone and/or in the halls). I used to be awkward/shy but now I've become more attractive/feminine (and am kind of, well, intentionally *pushing it* more than I need to).

I had him when I was 14 and he first came to the school. Back then our relationship was clear, but now that I'm going to be a senior (and I have him for TWO CLASSES this September), it's become something VERY different.

My question is, why now? Why is he attracted in *that way* now as opposed to before (and why?)


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, he's watched you grow and mature, and the two of you sound quite close. He's basically grown fond of you.

    But uh, I would avoid any kind of relationship with him that's more than friendly. Both of you could get into trouble, he could even get fired, and I mean, you're still young. It's hard, I've been in a situation very similar to this, but really, it's best to avoid this kind of thing.

    • We've met outside school twice through another close (safe) teacher, a colleague that (it's actually really funny) has been seeing tour relationship slowly develop and sometimes teases me in front of him (as well as one other colleague, they're both artists and non-conservative). We're really good at keeping it outside of the classroom, though -- in fact, I never speak in class and we rarely make eye contact (unless the lights are off and we're watching a movie, we do it discreetly and intense)

    • Show All
    • One last thing: Everyone's been saying "just be careful" but I know I can control myself, I'm a girl. Does that imply that HE won't be able to control himself? Like, outside school?

    • No, they're saying to be careful because almost always, older guys are only interested in a younger woman's body. It's sad, but true. Basically you don't want to get too attached, only to get hurt.

      And don't be so presumptuous. It's easy to think you can control yourself when you're not in a situation that demands your control.

What Guys Said 1

  • Stay away from him, it's not a very good idea to go for a teacher.


What Girls Said 3

  • stay away from him till ur at least 18 I know is probably tempting but its not good!

    • What if I keep it outside the classroom? we're excellent at acting aloof in front of the other students in class. We've met twice outside school already (see my lower response) and I "implied" in his yearbook that I hope he "tags along" more often (because I usually make plans with this other teacher, a safe but artsy liberal teacher, a lot older and again really safe)

    • Well I think that would be ok just as long as you take it slow sexually f you know what I mean please try to

    • Yeah I think we'll both be able to control it. He's shy and sensitive, doesn't easily jump into things. Although he is affectionate, to everyone, so I guess it's no problem to get close if sex doesn't get involved (until graduation, etc). I have the perfect amount of time, anyways, a year is fast & slow enough

  • He is possibly attracted to you now more than before because he has seen you grow up and mature over the years and you said you look different now and more feminine.

    This could have attracted him more now than before. and maybe he doesn't feel as scared to show it to you now because you are older and about to finish high school.

    thats my guess I can't be positively sure. but I hope my thoughts have helped your problem some how. :]

    • YES YES YES this is exactly what I think it is too... I just need one of the boys to confirm it ;)

    • Lol okay. well I hopefully they will answer your question soon :)

  • Keep away from him. He will get in lots of trouble.