NEED HELP! How do I pick up on guys? The proper way where I don't look desperate.

I'm 21 year old virgin whose decided that she's ready to date :) Some people say that I should go up to a guy and say I think you're cute/hot, but I believe that is just immature & will make me appear "too" available/desperate. I believe guys like a tiny hint of a challenge.

I'd like to know what I should do to let a guy know I'm interested. I don't have issues by the way ha ha I'm beautiful, in great shape, and smart with a sense of humor.

For example, the other day at my part time job, this guy was with his mom, he was about 21/22, and came over for samples...We couldn't stop smiling at each other HE SEEMED so nice and cute, like a happy person (lets just say I was really into him because I can tell by the way he smiled that he laughed & smiled a lot); we kept looking at each other, and later I thought, "what if I just asked him for his number?"

BUT bam! It hit me, I would appear desperate! You know what I mean? Think about it, if a girl just randomly came up to you and said,"you're so hot, can I have your number?" You wouldn't feel challenged whatsoever & wouldn't find her as attractive because she's easy, she's available, you can go out with her any moment with one word.

THANKS Everyone :)

Updates:
I don't think guys who are used to getting attention would find a girl who randomly walks up to them & asks for their number as appealing etc.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Personally, I wouldn't give you my number as I don't know you and for all I know your some crazy stalker lady who'll call me in the middle of the night and do nothing but breathe loudly. Hell, that's probably something I'd say if you would ask me!

    Guys do like a bit of a challenge(it doesn't have to be a lot but there needs to be a little), the guys who'll disagree with me and would give their numbers out are the ones who simply don't get or aren't used to female attention I'm guessing as otherwise they'd realize that if there isn't at least a little bit of cat & mouse, it gets boring really fast as there's no foundation and you don't have a single clue of who she is and what she likes.

    I think the best part about a girl approaching me is what she makes me feel/think, if she'd come up to me with clear intent then I already know I have all the power which is just boring but if she makes me guess as to what she's actually after or WHY she's after it, I'd be a lot more receptive and would have a lot less issues giving out my number if you'll ask for it or I might even ask for yours if I was interested.

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    • I guess it's just best if I be myself? As in, with every person I come across I make smile/laugh; I won't ignore whomever I'm attracted to, but I won't give them more attention than others. I get the challenge part, because I'd expect the same from guys (it's more interesting). I can tell THAT guy liked me (from work) because he couldn't stop smiling at me. What do you suggest I do the next time I see him?

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    • Your welcome, thx for best answer =)

    • Lol your welcome :D

What Guys Said 2

  • That's nonsense. If a girl gave me her phone number, I would be doing a happy dance in my brain. Read the article attracting guys 101.

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    • But what if you're a guy who is used to the attention?? See what I mean?

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    • It sounds reasonable, but just because he doesn't ask you out, it doesn't mean he's not interested. if he doesn't ask you out after that, and you're still interested, you should ask him out. your dad is old-fashioned(meaning sexist) and is straight-up wrong about looking desperate.

    • Ha ha that's why I was sort of skeptical about his advice, and he IS Persian, they're more traditional. But I was really into this guy even though I didn't know him; it was really weird because when I first saw him I didn't pay much attention, but once he came over with his mom and he started smiling (I was joking with them by the way, because I'm that type of person who LOVES being happy & making people laugh). He had this HUGE smile on his face (me too) as if he could't help smiling lol I do that to ppl

  • Ok if you're cute then just be friends with them and drop hints its that eZ if you're ugly idk...

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    • Sucks though because you'd have to work with that person, or see them frequently to be friends.

What Girls Said 1

  • I think what you should've said was "What would you say if a cute girl who looked a lot like me asked for your number right now?" while tilting your head down with a flirty smile. Then after he gives it, lift the piece of paper up to your chin and say "If your lucky, I might just call"

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    • Awwww that's is a really good line! Lol wow, that's good :)

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    • Good to know ha ha

    • Haha you'd be surprised at how well "cocky" works. Makes people think "what does she have to be cocky about, I want to know" pretty much forcing people to think about you =p

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