Is it shallow to only want to date good looking people?

Do you think I'm shallow because I won't date someone I don't find physically attractive? I don't think that's shallow, that's normal, right? Everyone wants someone who they're attracted to, don't they? A person that you like for their personality but doesn't turn you on is just a friend, I don't see how you can want to be affectionate and physical with someone you aren't turned on by.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • well there isn't a physical attraction, there most likely won't be an attraction at all. physical attraction is usually the first impression that someone gets from someone else. so if you don't find them attractive, then you are less likely to want to learn more about them and develop a liking for them. so no, you aren't being shallow. if you date someone you aren't attracted to, that would be more like a charity then anything.

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What Guys Said 4

  • In my opinion shallow is when someone already know that the other person is wonderful and friend/date-worthy but get turned off by some superficial aspects of this other person such as outer appearance, social status, wealth, race, disability, education level, etc. Being attracted to people who you think attractive isn't it. Being attracted to men/women in uniform isn't it. Being attracted to doctors because you find men in white coat with stethoscope hanging over their neck is attractive isn't it either (Here is a tricky one because doctors are usually wealthy and some may accuse you for being attracted to the wealth - Now that's shallow). Clear as mud?

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  • I think that's totally normal, why would you want to date someone you weren't attracted to?

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  • Normal.

    I think you can come to love someone you weren't initially physically attracted to after a long enough and close enough friendship, but I'm talking years not the instant hit of the physical.

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  • I know plenty of good looking people who go out with ugly people. If you went out with an ugly person you'd only be taking one off of them off the market that some pretty person would love to go out with. You're actually more of a martyr.

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What Girls Said 2

  • i don't feel this is shallow, it's normal. it may be shallow to only go for the extremely hott type, and ignore every other boy you see. attractiveness is very subjective. I find some guys cute that my friends don't.

    I think everyone deserves a fair chance, and if you aren't attracted to them right away, it may develop as you get to know them.

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  • You have to have a balance of both :)

    Yes, it's normal. We do that because we want to pass our genes and we want our offspring to be beautiful. So, don't worry, you're not shallow. BUT, if you say you "love/like" a person without knowing their personality and only make these assumptions and feelings based just on their looks, then yes, that makes you a wee-bit shallow. Just know that as long as you consider the insides, your thought of the outside won't matter :)

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