How to ask a girl out? Help!!!

I wanna make it sound casual and not intimidating at all, this would me my second time asking her so is kinda hard :|, I'm not sure if she likes me, she's very friendly and smiles a lot but considering she's shy.

Updates:
How about:

Me: Hey you free Friday night? :)

She: mm yea why?

Me: I wanna take you out, what do you say? ;)

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Relate to how she's thinking:

    If she's shy - there's GOTTA be a reason why. Maybe because she sees you as a friend and knows you're interested? Maybe she's approached by guys 24/7 who are horny and just want a quick lay.. etc

    If you find that reason or can figure it out somehow, without letting her know, then you have a STRONG edge on the situation! She will see that you are trying your best, even if your intentions come across as dirt, she will see that you really do care.

    A natural approach isn't walking up and saying: "Do you want to date me" because how would you feel if a gay dude came and said that do you? You'd feel creeped out and probably a bit defensive, almost as if you'd kill the guy if he didn't immediately stop what he did.

    Instead, you have to SLOWLY but surely turn up the temperature.. Start by spending time with her and knowing her interests and what makes her really happy versus really angry.. When you have a lot of basic information about her (really simply to gather), you know how to treat her with the utmost respect and now how to make her really happy - just follow the blueprint you've made.

    If I knew a girl was shy and loved humor, but that she was really scared about finding true love because she just got dumped after a 2 year relationship - then I would understand that I'd have to very slowly progress in showing I'm interested.. not instantaneously taking her on dates or asking her out.. but just spending time with her at school, see if she is comfortable going to the park and walking around while talking.. Show her that she doesn't need to feel insecure with you around - but at the same time don't be bashful of embarassing her in a silly way.. Like when you guys are at a dance, grab her belt loops and make her move really weird and then say: "You're so cute" and give her a huge hug.. She'll have no control over it and realize you were just playing (hopefully) but realize that you should VERY rarely use the embarassing thing, if ever. It's a spice to keep you away from the friend zone.

    If I knew all of that, maybe after 2 or 3 weeks I'd start progressing onto movie dates or putting my arm around her.. Maybe holding hands.. It's all in what I felt she wouldn't be "against" but exactly what would be showing interest.. Basically, be respectful yet push her towards a relationship just a little at a time.

    If someone nudges you, you wouldn't notice.. Like a guy walking past you in a crowded public area.. But if someone pushed you hard, like a guy trying to fight you, then you'd instantly get defensive or you'd cowar away.. That's exactly the concept.. You want to nudge, not push.

    ~ ArtistBBoy

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    • Forget what I just said.. this guy knows what he's talking about :P...

What Girls Said 13

  • It seems alright from how you are going about doing this, although I would say "let's have dinner together" in the last sentence to sound less obvious and more casual :)

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  • what happened the first time you asked her out?

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  • i feel like dates where other people are around are best, cause not only will she feel more comfortable. but your friends can tell you what vibe they get from her and if she likes you or not. also a group date could easily turn into a one on one date. maybe have people over to watch a movie and some sort of game night and invite her along.

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  • or

    after a normal conversation, say casually:

    "we should hang out some time(: "

    if she agrees, get a little more specific.

    "why don't we go see a movie friday?"

    be upfront, or itll be easier for her to decline.(:

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  • ask her if she wants to talk a bit with you :) then ask her whyyy she is so shy if she laughs , she likes you :)

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  • that sounds good. or just say would you like to do something together friday? but maybe do it where there aren't many people around so she won't feel pressured, unless you want her to be pressured into going out with you, then ask her out around a lot of people:) because I know for me if a guy asked me out and there were lots of people around I would feel bad saying no in front of other people:) good luck

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  • if she smiles a lot then that's a good sign that she's into you. If I like someone all I do is smile when there around and talking to me. Just make it cute, so try make her laugh before you ask, or ask while she's smiling, it will be hard to say no (although I doubt she would say no anyway), and if you sound a little nervous it will make her think you're really cute, so try not to stress too much about it, and just let it happen :) goodluck

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    • Your awesomee thankss :)

    • That doesn't have to be true you know... I smile a lot even when I'm not into the guy just because I'm happy about something... depends on the way she smiles!

  • movies. always easy, always casual and cheap. can easily be "just friends" or "couple" scenario and can swing from one to the other depending on the mood. if things go well you can follow up with a trip to food court and extend the date.

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  • Hey do you wanna hang out some time?" something casual, and not threatening. Try making it seem like you are going with a friends, or better yet ask her if you could go on a group date with both of your friends.

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  • Say, "Hey, would you like to go out some time?"

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  • I like what you said in the update - good idea. Good luck!

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  • Plzzzzz rate this best question in need 100 XPER points and I already have 81 plzzz rate this best question

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  • what happened the first time?

    say "I really want to go to_______, I'd love it if you would come along"

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What Guys Said 6

  • hey there,

    well my friend, one thing you should understand first is how pressure can kill your chances. What I mean by this, is if you are planning on asking her out, make the first time you guys get together, its something where she feels no obligation or pressure from you to be there. For example, say you and your friends usually go play disc golf every week, invite her along. That way, if she doesn't show, you were already going to go do it anyway. If she shows up, that's a great sign. Depending on if it seemed like she was having a good time during this unobligatory meeting, THEN you ask her on a date, just you and her. And man, if you really wanna stand out among the other guys, don't do the conventional dinner and movie date(that's SO BORING). Think of something fun the two of you could do that is out of the norm. I took my girlfriend to a bowling alley for our first date, which actually was a ton of fun, and something she didn't expect. Women love spontaneous and unpredictable guys, think about it, its much more exciting than someone you easily predict. good luck.

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  • Find something she likes, tell her you've been meaning to try it out, and tell her she should go do it with you. Activity dates are way better than dinner/movie dates, and even if it doesn't work out at least you get to go rock climbing or something.

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  • Before hand, make a lot of small talk, so that she is comfortable with you, and she gets to know you better in terms of a friend first. It will make asking her out easier, her reaction more favorable, and it will make your long term relationship exponentially more stable.

    (I know that this is the right thing to do, because I have already made the mistake of not doing it)

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  • Not the best way to ask because if she's busy you've already got yourself a big fat NO!

    Better off saying "I wanna take you out, is fri or sat night best for you?"

    You're basically then forcing her to choose between the 2 days and will almost guarantee you a yes :)

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  • "Hey, wanna go get a coffee this weekend?"

    Or "Have you heard about that movie blahblahblah? It looks really good. I wanna go see it this weekend, you should come with"

    etc

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    • use these lines. especially the movie one.

    • I really like this one especially the movie... but: a movie on a first date... you can't really talk...

    • that why you have to go to dinner first or after if you're gonna do a movie date :)

  • Just say anything dude, it doesn't really matter, just be yourself. Don't say hey bitch let's go on a date, but other than that really anything works.

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