Okay here's the deal I just don't get how to be something other than friends with a guy. I want to be, I think I'm attractive enough ( link ), generally I get along with people pretty well and friends say I'm easy to talk to so I really just don't get it. I do have friends that are guys, in fact I live with five of them along with two other girls. Just for the record I'm not talking about dating them that's a recipe for disaster -- if dormcest is bad housecest, if it went wrong, could turn into what WWIII?
Am I sending out some weird friends only signal? I'm around guys a lot, my major is guy heavy, I'm really outdoorsy, and fairly competitive -- but what gives there are girls like that with relationships. I'm not exactly a shrinking violet here either, I mean I've asked guys out for coffee and hung out with them before -- do you really enjoy talking one on one with a girl for 3 hours if you're just testing to see if she'd be a good friend? If we're talking about pretty personal stuff and you usually see me just slumming it in hiking boots, but I've put on a nice top, actual shoes, and asked you out isn't that kind of a hint?I don't get it and I'm kind of frustrated because I usually understand most things, I'm a human development minor for pete sake -- am I really such an epic failure at reading people? Just to clarify this isn't a one off rant either, this has happened at least 5 or 6 times, over a period of time of course I'm not some guy crazy fiend or anything, but I'm 20 and I've been in college for two years now and I just would really enjoy connecting with someone who sees me as a girl and not just a friend. Is it a problem that I'm never going to be the girl who flounces around in dresses and make up, pretends she's dumb or plays games to get attention? Do guys actually like that? I mean I'm all for a challenge, but this is like trying to solving a rubix cube before you figure out the algorithm.
Most Helpful Guy
I think you're gorgeous, with a classic beauty that is much richer than 90% of "pretty" girls. I'm a photographer, and you have a rare beauty that would compel me to approach you in public and ask permission to photograph you. Your looks are definitely not the problem.
And honestly, from your post, I can't guess what the problem might be, other than looking too hard. I know from experience that, even though it's a cliche, it's also true that you're most likely to find the right person when you're not looking for them. I don't suggest giving up, but you might try just no looking for a while and see what/who sneaks up on you and surprises your heart.