Is my body size holding me back?

Girls never seem to notice me and I know for fact I have a great looking face. But the problem, as I see it, is that I'm small boned. I am narrow so I look fragile and to be honest most girls are as thick as me if not thicker. If a guy is skinny, as in narrow and small limbs and bones, is that a turnoff? I have gotten comments my entire life about how I need to eat more and blah blah.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Based on what you typed, you are insecure about being skinny. This insecurity lowers your self esteem and prevents you from being confident. There's your answer right there.

    Hardly any girls are going to turn you down just because you are skinny. They will if you are fat, so be glad you are not in that situation. You get overlooked or turned down because you are not comfortable in your own skin, and women can smell that.

    The solution? Take your confidence back and embrace being skinny, or start lifting weights.

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What Girls Said 4

  • It probly is. just find skinny girls. Or ask a girl flat out not to judge you by your 'thickness'. I know plenty of cute guys at my school who it would be kind of intimadating to date them because the girls are suppose to be slimmer or whatever. I would date them it would just take getting used to

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  • it's a turn off for me. I feel like he looks unhealthy or very very young. Like I'm dating a little boy. That might be because I'm not super skinny though. I'm more thin/curvy.

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  • It might turn me off if a guy was really fragile looking.

    I'm small, but I'm strong, and rarely feel the need to check myself.

    If I were dating a really scrawny guy, I'd feel like I'd break him if I wasn't careful.

    Which is ridiculous, of course, but that's the impression I'd get from a teeny person. o.O

    The same way teeny tiny girls scare the crap out of me.

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  • I'm not sure about other girls, but me I'm (unhealthy) obsessed with my weight/body image, so being with a skinny guy would just remind me more of how fat I look/feel.

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What Guys Said 4

  • Women naturally are attracted to something I've created, a term called "tissue value". Women subconsciously are attracted to what a "man" is supposed to look like. A man is large, has thick shoulders, calves, a wide face and big head. I too am none of those things. It's like I stopped maturing at 17. I'm 6'1", 200 lbs and muscular, but the distribution is very thin. It's very hard to gain muscle without fat. I'm a true skinny fat and I hate it more than anything in the world. I have my good days and bad days, aesthetically that is. I used to have no problem meeting women in my 20s but now at 38 and separated for 6 years I can find no one that I wish to date. I will not settle either, that is NOT happiness.

    Confidence does matter, but unless it's painfully obvious you are uncomfortable it is not the reason why you're having trouble as these other posters are throwing in there. You didn't say this and so I'm not sure why they're saying that.

    I've found that the only women who will look at me flirtatiously are 20-14 years old, skinny themselves, or overweight, or their fathers were skinny/thin guys too. Women who are raised around thick, big men, or the women are really athletic and fit will most likely not be attracted to guys like us. That is until we nail down our nutrition and build a nice layer of muscle to thicken and add circumference throughout the skeletal frame. I've been working on it for over 20 years. When I was young it was the steroid era of diet and workout advice that led me no where. Only now with guys like Nate Miyaki and Anthony Mychal have I been able to make better gains. I always thought when I reached 30 I'd look like a man, now I think, when I'm 40. It probably will never happen and I've learned to be ok with it. My hope is that the next 24 yr old I meet will accept me. That is the only age I meet, for 6 years now. Women my age don't take me serious and I hate it. They look so much older, mature compared to me. I'm good-looking, I don't get it.

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    • TYPO!! "I've found that the only women who will look at me flirtatiously are 20-24 years old.."

      That should have been "20-24", not 20-14!

  • if your tall, then don't worry

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  • Well if your tall I don't think its a problem but if your skinny and short you mite hav one but if your really worried bout it you shld just go to the gym

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    • I am short - 5'8 with shoes on.

    • Thats not that short because your still taller than most girls but like jarhead said your insecure bout being skinny so if you strt lifting wiegths you may feel better bout yourself

  • goto the gym. problem solved.

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    • I've been doing that, but I don't gain anything from it. I still look scrawny and fragile...

    • Unless you have some rare genetic problem, 99% of the time people that didn't gain anything didn't EAT ENOUGH. When you are lifting weights, eat more protein rich foods than you have ever eaten before. After that, I guarantee you will gain muscle no matter how fast your metabolism is.

    • I was a beanstalk in high school, never put on weight. Then I started eating everything available. Milk? Gulp down a carton. Bread? Eat a whole one before noon. Cold cuts, like cheese or ham or salmon? Eat a double portion. Yoghurt, skyr, cream, gobble it up. Eat a whole chicken every two days. Force down food until it hurts, for every meal. Eat, eat, eat, eat. Calorie surplus will make you gain, no matter what your metabolism is like, I know from experience.

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