Why are only "conformist" girls considered pretty?

What I mean by "conformist" (I can't find the word I'm trying to say!) is girls who by outer appearance, look similar. For example: a good majority of girls at my school wear like pounds of black makeup, skanky tops, shorts and skirts that barely cover their butts, and are basically orange. Also, a lot of them don't even have nice personalities. Is it only attractive because they are considered easy? I just don't understand why these girls get all the attention, and yet, there are so many naturally pretty girls who get unnoticed. I mean, for me, I am starting to doubt whether I'm attractive at all because I seem to go unnoticed.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Look at it this way :

    Girls you described are what attracts most guys. That's absolutely true.

    Now, if you're not like those girls, you're different. Maybe there are quite a few girls like you around, probably not at your school. Because that's how the majority of people are; "conformists".

    Get rid of the idea that you're unattractive out of your head right now. Yes you're get unnoticed. Why? Because you're surround by attention whores. They purposely wear skanky clothes and so much makeup to get attention.

    And who exactly do you think they get their attention from? Or rather, whose attention are they looking for? Their male equivalents. And you don't want to get those kind of guy's attention.

    You see, you are a rare breed. You live around people who look and dress the same, listen to the same music and only hang out and like each others. You have to look for people like you, who DO have a personality of their own. Those are the kind of guys you want to look for. Problem is, there isn't as many of them. And they don't always seem as attractive.

    Another problem is, those guys might also be attracted to those girls. Because you see, guys are retarded most of the time. "Conformist" girls aren't considered pretty. Or if you put it this way; you'd be pretty too if everyone could see your breasts and your butt... Get it? You could be really unattractive, as long as you show as much of your body as possible, you'll get attention. And that's what those girls are doing. And please don't do that.

    Those girls will get ton of attention, adventurous sex lives and plenty of relationships and experiences. Then when they're past that age, guys will lose interest into them and look for girls like YOU. (Or if they're THAT kind of guy, they'll look for girls that are the same age those girls they lost interest in were a few years ago!)

    The sad part is that if you're looking for a special someone, you'll have to wait. The only thing it means is that you've matured earlier. You can either find a guy that's also mature (hard to find) or simply wait... Because at your age, this is mostly all you'll get.

    But don't, DON'T try to follow the crowd and become like every other girls. You'll get attention but it's not going to be worth it. And the attention you'll get is not the kind of attention you're seeking. Those are couples that don't last. You're never going to get into a serious relationship like this.

    Don't change. Stay the way you are, for those special guys out there who are looking for someone like you. I can guarantee you that there's more guys around you who would dream to be with you than you might think. You probably just aren't looking at the right people.

    Remember, you ARE beautiful and you don't need to change. Just be patient.

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What Guys Said 22

  • First you are very attractive and throughout your lifetime I doubt you will have any problems getting noticed. Yes, boys will give the extra look to the girls with short skirts and extra makeup BUT then we discover personalities are important and suddenly nice girls with nice personalities are the ones that begin to look better to us. As a specie, we are slow to come around at times.

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  • they are only pretty to the conformist guys to be honest. (: And oh by your pic your hella attractive

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  • either you have an inaccurate perception of what is going on around you OR they guys around you are idiots and probably conformists themselves. if they are afraid to be different, dating a girl that is different would make them...different. and that is taboo to droids that have to be followers and can't be leaders. now as far as you starting to doubt whether your attractive or not, let me check your pics (brb)...okay you don't have any, but your profile picture shows your face and it looks mighty damn beautiful to me. so there you go. now go be YOU, because you are the only person on this planet than can do it.

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  • one word: p*rn

    yeah the one thing most girls dislike is actually the thing they most try to emulate because they think its attractive to men. have you ever tried to watch professional p*rn (not amateur, since its for non-actors). they pound on the make up, wear the sluttiest clothes and act seductive BECAUSE its p*rn. girls who dress like that in real life, know that men tend to like that kind of thing so they will try to do the same. its for attention usually as most of the guys who go up to them, they turn down but..its the fact that they think they have to show a ton of skin just to get attention. real girls, like yourself know that its what's on the inside, that matters, the outside is only a bonus and those girls have an insecuirty problem with their personality so they try to hide it by dressing slutty/acting the part

    hopefully this helps, and by the way, even though all you have is a face shot, you are pretty. I can't tell but I think you have green eyes. which are my fav. so thank god you do (if you do?). your skin looks good, at least on your face so that's also a plus, (you don't need makeup, its only if you want to at this point)

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    • True! I never thought of it like that, and thanks! I have blue/green eyes :)

    • too bad I can't see that body pic now, ha!. I can only dream :P

    • HAHAHAHAHA

      I just read the first line there...

      A very realistic way of looking at it. And I concur. x)

  • I understand where you are coming from. You need to remember one thing, by definition of the other girls being the majority and conformist they are essentially one single entity not individuals. By definition this conformist attitude will hit a note with more of the opposite/same sex than those of us who stay true to our own style and priciples. Unfortunately you may have to wait a couple of years for the guys to mature and want something other than an easy lay.

    Having said all that from your profile pic you look pretty to me, stick with it.

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  • You are! Boys will grow into a men and it will be all right. And if you feel unnoticed, I a guy who you never notice yourself. He most probably noticed you. It is strange that it works that way but many times it does.

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  • I think you're much more attractive than the girls you described (assuming that is you in the picture).

    I hate umpa lumpa girls (orange skin, fake tan whatever. Y'know Corin from that BB, Posh Becks that lot). I think it's pathetic and they look awful.

    The girls you're using the word conformist to describe are not really attractive to me. But I'm not much with the conformity at all, I may be somewhat a minority.

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  • They aren't pretty to me. They get more attention because most young guys are usually horny and give the conformist girls more attention. But that doesn't mean that women like you aren't pretty. Guys will want to be with you rather than the conformist girls when they're ready to commit to a relationship.

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  • The "conformist" girls you are talking about are ugly to me. Although I do like the short shorts thing. And yeah I see a lot of girls that do the pounds of makeup thing too. There was one girl who I thought was really really hot, she had an awesome personality, and she was really really smart. Now she's a cake face and she hangs out with all the popular girls. I'm sad because she looked so good when she didn't wear that much makeup. And now that she does she looks fake.

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    • Sorry about the girl, hopefully shell go back to her old look someday! And at least someone thinks it's ugly!

  • They're considered attractive because of their looks. BUT, if they're easy then don't worry about it.

    Their expiration date will come to pass soon. Just wait it out through high school. If you're smart, then definitely go to college. Things will get better then you'll meet better guys than the ones you knew in high school.

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    • PS. Is your profile picture really your picture, because you don't look like you'd have a problem getting guys' attention. Just don't become some dirty "tramp" while in high school - it's really not worth you getting upset over. These girls who get more "attention" really aren't better than you. Trust me.

    • Thank you! And ha ha yeah it's me, and I'm going to college in a few weeks so hopefully things will change!

    • Well, good for you, and good luck!

  • Girls who spend the most time fretting about their looks, or believe oppositely that they are goddesses, tend to be the ones with the most shallow, two-dimensional personalities and tend to conform to societies ideal image to keep that delusion running in their minds.

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  • I think its that guys don't see that you fit there personality, so even if they see you as attractive, why bother if ya'll don't have anything in common. Its scary to be try to talk to someone or do something with them when it seems that ya'll don't have anything in common.

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  • i think you're really pretty actually.

    it was the main reason I read the tittle to your Q.

    those girls are just insecure, they want attention and they're trying to get it from the wrong people cause they're young and immature.

    you seem to be a lot more mature than they are, so for that, I congratulate you.

    just wait till they all grow up and see how they messed up.

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  • its not that theyre considered pretty, theyre considered easy.

    ps. you shouldn't think that - you're gorgeous, if you think guys don't notice you its probably cause they kno you're pretty and not easy, it takes a lot of confidence to approach a girl like that:p

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  • they just know they can f*** them there nothing prettier then a girl that ain't a slut but that's hard to come by these days everybody just wants to f*** each other and move on to the next so if you can break out of that frame of mind your special the people that are diffrent are better if you step out of the flock you will learn how to control them most people are very simple stay you f*** them

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  • I kind of want a girl to not be conformist.

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  • first of all you have to conformist not to conform (in short we are all conformists) and I actually prefer alternative girls normal is boring and therefore unnatractive to me

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  • I've been turned down by every slut, so when I have the $$$ I'm paying.

    I'm aware how loserish that sounds

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  • Dressing in tramp clothes basically auto-labels you as slutty. Guys who are horny (read: most guys, most of the time) will go towards the ones who are more likely to put out.

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  • Judging solely by your profile picture, you are very pretty. In fact, some guys might find you intimidating and/or think you already have a boyfriend because you are so attractive.

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  • Why would you doubt that? Your hot.

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  • Hey, I am deeply offended! j/k not really...a little maybe ;-)

    but really I definitely do not fall for that look. Girls who dress like that lack creativity and personal style. but to be honest they only tend to attract their male counterparts so it's not really an issue for me. You look pretty in your profile picture, definitely get the "I am starting to doubt whether I'm attractive" voice out of your head. maybe you are after the wrong kinda guys? but a lot of guys out there don't fall for that overly "furnished" look. Keep the faith in men...we are not all the same and want to date a p*rnstar wannabee!

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What Girls Said 8

  • Actually, you'd be surprised by guys' opinions. Go up to some guys you know and respect, and ask them their opinions on these so-called pretty girls, and then on the ones you think are pretty.

    I used to think the same as you, but then after talking to some dudes about it, realized that it's all a bit of an illusion! Those other girls get attention, but trust me, it's not good attention.

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  • let me tell you something you are pretty! and girls like that who dress in shirts skirts will get attention BUT the wrong attention..yes they may seem popular now and at the clubs etc but it the nice girls like you that get married and get the right guy eventually

    all you need to do is be funny and fun to be around and get confident..guys love a girl who is confident and likes to have fun !

    don't be wanting to be one of the sheep be the sexy 'new' you and go out get some new clothes ..funk it up to YOUR original style and try to see what happens okay

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  • OMG not the oompa loompa look! Men tell me all the time that they don't like the orange look at all, so don't worry about that.

    Girls that dress skanky are trying to be skanks and boys know that. Also, most of those girls probably have a reputation among the guys already so they guys go to them because they know they are easy. In college, guys go for the easy girls until they are ready to settle down and find a girl that they think is nice. I have come across many guys in college that have come out and said 'I'm tired of skanks, I want a good girl.'

    In reality...it is about waiting for the boys to grow up. Some never do.

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  • I have a lot of guys tell me I'm pretty. I'm a bigger girl too.. But because of what I call the "Barbie doll syndrome" I don't think I am. I don't have a tiny waist.. I don't have the most perfect breasts, or tight hips and a small ass. Although, I think at this point, barbie has been replaces with a creature called snooki.

    I certainly don't' think I'm all that 'pretty' but that's because those 'icons' ruined my self esteem. But the way I see it? I'd rather be me than a barbie. I mean after all.. she's made of plastic, and Ken had a mangina.

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  • Guys are immature and when they grow up they realize that their whores and girls like you are attractive. Don't worry about it! I used to feel the same way.

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  • Haha I hate the whole fake bake look. I never understood why I guy would find orange sexy. Lol(of course not all guys like that look). But, like a guy mentioned, p*rn would probably make it desirable. I like being fair, to be honest. I used to hate not looking super tan in the summer, but whatever I like the way I look. I've learned to be happy and enhance my good features. :)

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  • Wow, swedish girls and american girls are so not alike.. The popular girls you described sounds like kids, or just really trashy girls to me. The popular girls here are the outgoing, funny, pretty and chic girls who knows all about the latestfashion. Of course the less make up and more natural look the better. And the nicer you are, the more friends and bwtter reputation you get and the more popular you'll be.

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  • I think you should stop making exscuses and judging girls you don't know to make yourself feel better about not getting as much male attention.

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