OK ladies, put yourself in her shoes. Lets say you once had a huge crush on me, but I turn you down. After getting a boyfriend later that year, you start to contact me again, and reveal how incredibly hurt you were by me, but after some miscommunication, you angrily tell me how you would never go out with me, even if I came back begging. Years pass during which you've had a steady boyfriend for a while, though going through ups and downs. You decide to see how my life was going and contact me again. We meet and hang out together a few times, like the friends we once were. We are very comfortable with each other and able to make each other laugh and smile, with absolutely nothing sexual of nature implied. Lets say, after a long relationship, you finally break up with your boyfriend. Where do I stand? No chance? Short-leash? A pillar you can fall back on? Rip me apart if you wish, I just want to hear what you think.
I would keep it as a friendship to tell you the truth.. I been in this situation and the tables always turn the guys later want to talk to me. But I let them know they had their chance back then and the feeling I once had for them just stoped. In your situation I don't know how you feel about her but don't rush into anything or you'll be the rebound keep it simple for now.
I've been in something sort of similar. I think you still have a chance but you're kinda the guy that got away, that in my -her- head you've been built into a whole 'if we had been together it would have been perfect' and because of that it's fun to have you around and pretend that that relationship is always an option, but probably never actually date you for fear of ruining that perfect dream relationship.
if I was her I wouldn't take a risk of breaking my heart AGAIN... but u're a lucky guy! she still contacts you and talks to you which might mean something... you can try though and ask her out... it wouldn't hurt..or maybe talk to her starting with "i have a friend who..." and tell her your story and then ask her what your friend (a.k.a you) should do... she'd probably guess it's you, if she's not a complete dumbass... but still, girls always fall for that one!