How come when you ask if you look bad, people say no, but if you ask if you look good, they also say no?

i've seen ton of am I pretty q's on the internet, and no matter how you word it the answer is always no.

if you ask if you're ugly people say no, you're better looking than you think, everyone is beautiful in their own way, and you're fishing for compliments.

if you ask if you're pretty people say no, you're not as good looking as you think you are, you're being egotistical, and you're fishing for compliments.

is there ever any honesty?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • In the first scenario it's assumed the person has a low self-esteem, so people are more sensitive towards that and most of them will try to say fairly nice things. Of course, there will always be people (usually anon), on the harsher side who will resort to insults and honesty that hurts, but they're generally in the minority if the QA's nice enough.

    In the second situation people assume the QA knows he/she's attractive, and is looking to be admired and given compliments. Therefore, they feel the need to bring them down a notch by telling them they're not really that pretty/hot. They'll be like "meh, you're average".

    I notice that a lot of the answers depend on the QA's tone, choice of words, and what kind of pictures the QA took (smiling, making faces, amount of clothing, etc.)

    As you can see, we have a little trouble with objectivity.

    Personally, I cringe at telling someone they're ugly/fat, even over the Internet, so that's not what I'm going to say. I think it's unnecessarily hurtful, and it's probably more helpful to compliment certain aspects of them that are favorable (almost everyone has some), and give suggestions on how they can improve their appearance. I might add something about confidence too. I'm not going to lie to them, but I prefer to use some tact.

    As for the people who are clearly attractive, I'll say "Yeah, don't worry about it, you're pretty", or something to that effect. It might feed their ego, it might not, but either way I don't really care.

    Anyway, many of those kinds of questions I just skip over, because people should really be using the reality check feature.

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    • no one ever answers the reality check tho

    • I see some that do. I mean, it's rare that I go on there, but I do, once in a while. I agree with Eric, this really isn't the place to post questions like that.

What Guys Said 7

  • not usually. people don't want to let there internet friends down by saying the truth, and if you post it anonymously you usually see trolling answers. this is really not the place to post that type of question imo.

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  • People are so tired of this question, we get angry with people who ask!

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  • Because someone asking if they're ugly is sympathetic, they have low self esteem, ect. It makes you feel good to make someone else feel better.

    If they're asking if they're pretty, they're going to get a more honest answer, plus people just don't like when pretty girls ask if they're hot. Most of the time it's just fishing for compliments, which nobody likes.

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  • I agree with Shaun...if we are not your boyfriend and or you do not like us..then why should we feed your ego?

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  • What do we get out of feeding your ego?

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  • I am not going to engage in the fireworks here...lol...as a guy with a fetish or two..I don't like females that say "no"...btw...born and raised in Nevada...lived in Ames 12 years as well...XOXOXOXO

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  • I am an honest guy and I think I know what you are asking. If you want to know whether you are pretty or not then truthfully No. For the life of me I cannot understand how you are an aspiring model. You don't even look average. That last picture on your profile says it all. I'm sorry but your career path doesn't make any kind of sense whatsoever

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    • well unfortunately most guys on this hot think girls who have a pair of t*ts and are not deformed are hot. I mean seriously she can't even compare to any models, do you really want me to provide links?

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    • TO QA--TO PROVE MY POINT: check out comicsans most recent question and look at how he defines "average" . such such low standards

    • I thought the girl he said was average was actually cute.

What Girls Said 4

  • I always answer honestly. I won't hesitate to tell a girl she's gorgeous if she really is. I also won't tell a girl she's gorgeous if I don't think she is. I'm never mean, though.

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  • Being honest some times gets you bombarded with insults from other users and not everyone is in the mood to deal with that. That's why you see a lot of anonymous posts/comments going on around here.

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  • link

    This is a lot like my question, I wondered the same thing but kinda got more to the point.

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  • i think you're average looking. Am being honest.

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    • I am going to assume this anonymous poster is pretty herself and is just comparing herself to another pretty girl (the question asker)...then again..it is wrong to assume...

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