Men: If a woman is dressed more dressy than others at a bar, do you automatically assume she's high maintenance?

If a women is dressed up in skirt/dress, heels, hair done, and make-up do you assume she's high maintenance or trying to hard? Do you then not approach her?

I've been told I'm pretty, but men don't approach me that often when I'm out at bars and I feel like I might be giving off a bad vibe by how I dress... I grew up on a farm and was a tomboy growing up, so when I got into college and made friends with girls who act more "girly" I pretty much went dress/heels crazy and now always dress up to go out. That being said I don't dress provacatively, I dress for my body type and cover up, but I wear cute tops, a heels, and curl my hair.

Do I need to try and tone down my outward appearance? Or should I just be who I am and wait for the right guy? I don't want to come off as some gold digger who wants clothes/shoes/etc since I am definitely not like that and don't want to attract that kind of man, but I want to seem more approachable. thoughts? Thanks!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's about how you act, not how you dress. If you are dressed fly but you smile at him, appear to be friendly and welcoming then you won't come off bitchy. But if you look stonefaced and act standoffish then you will be intimidating. Don't change who you are to please guys because every man likes something different. I know guys who like plain janes and I know guys who like the fly chicks. You're approachable when you smile though

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What Guys Said 3

  • I don't. I can't speak for other guys but I agree with what the girls have been saying. My initial impression of a girl's level of maintenance is based more on how she acts than by her outfit. I will say that I tend to avoid girls who wear high heels out to a bar or club but that's more of a personal pet peeve and not something most guys will care about.

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  • I mean all of it sounds good except the doing of the hair. Are we talking just like straightening it or actually going to a salon. If it's the first one then it's okay but if you go to like a salon like you did for prom then it's too much.

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  • The right men just are not approaching you...it has nothing to do with how you dress..it is just non-confident men..that is keeping you from being approached..

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What Girls Said 2

  • High maintenance is more of an attitude than a look. Perhaps you can infer this attitude from a girl who is dressed in very expensive clothing, but I still think a "high maintenance vibe" comes more from how you project yourself and not what you're wearing.

    You sound like a stylish, fashionable girlie girl. When I lived in Del Mar, CA, that described almost every girl I saw. And trust me, guys were flocking to them.

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  • it's not how you dress, it's more of your attitude probably why no guy approaches you. try smiling, don't look cold and aloof

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