What do you guys think once a cheater always a cheater?

Or do you think the right woman can change that and any experiences with it?

Updates:
Another question. Do you guys think that this saying is true why or why not and any experiences with it? "always pick the second choice because if the first choice was right there wouldn't be a second choice"

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Most Helpful Guy

  • About your update, it's not true. Nothing in this world is perfect. Regardless of who we end up with, we'd be lying to ourselves if we said someone is perfect. Not just because we all have our own ideal of perfection, but because that ideal is always changing.

    I'll give you simple example - guys who leave the girls they're with, to be with another prettier girl. See here, the girl is only "prettier" in his eyes. And there's a common phenomenon that occurs with guys, that causes them to find people less and less pretty the more time they spend with them. This is called the "grass is always greener on the other side" effect, and it will make guys think other girls are prettier than the one he's with after a while.

    This was just ONE example, and it's only related to looks and the effect it has on guys. However, there are TONS of more examples and situations that would cause a guy to feel like being with another girl. Maybe his girl doesn't do or say things that another girl does. Who knows? Does that mean he should keep on leaving the girl he's with every time he sees someone he could potentially be happy with? No. Or he's going to keep doing that for the rest of his life and never find someone to commit to.

    It's normal to thing about being with other people sometimes. But, as long as you are already happy with the choices you made, it is unwise to pursue those thoughts. At the end of the day, it'll be your actions and decisions that matter. The fact that the decision was brought up in the first place should be irrelevant.

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What Guys Said 8

  • I think people can change. I don't believe once a cheater, always a cheater. I'd be willing to forgive someone for cheating on me under the following circumstances:

    1) It was a one-time thing, and not an affair. It was just something that happened ONCE because she was either drunk, or feeling a certain way (lonely, for example).

    2) She feels sorry about it and acknowledges that she f***ed up bad.

    3) I feel that, even though she cheated on me, she still loves me and wants to be with me.

    Examples:

    1) She developed secret feelings for a random guy, and for multiple weeks she has been meeting with him behind my back and cheating on me. I wouldn't be OK with that.

    2) She doesn't think she did anything wrong, and/or blames it on me. F***her, I'm out.

    3) She doesn't seem interested in me anymore. I'd feel upset and not want to see her again.

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    • I would have a problem with accepting loneliness as an excuse? Girls and guys feel that way all the time, they have to either learn to deal with it, or realize that you aren't the right person for them.

    • I know but sometimes we slip up and make mistakes. If I still thought she cared very much about me, I would be willing to let it go. That's really just me, though. I'd understand if she didn't do the same for me if I were to cheat on her. ;o

  • i have a low opinion of cheaters.

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  • Ok I hate throwing around ridiculous percentages but I would say that 75% of men that cheat will always cheat. But for younger men it is not as bad once they "sew their oats" they may grow out of it as I did. I was not a cheater but I kinda got a round a bit

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  • Nope, always a cheater.

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  • once a cheater always a cheater

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  • People can change.

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  • Once a cheater/traitor, ALWAYS a cheater/traitor.

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  • I think that. Even if they aren't I see them as a pretty low person anyway.

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What Girls Said 7

  • Once a cheater always a cheater. It's like that other saying: a leopard can't change its spots.

    The temptation will always be there even if he does love the woman he's with. I've experienced being cheated on and it's not a nice feeling, especially when you're very loyal and wouldn't dream of cheating on them.

    It's a pretty low thing to do in a relationship in my opinion from either a guy or a girl.

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  • Yup mostly.I didn't say all but I think its about 80% of them.Only few will change but they might change only for a while and return back to their old attitude.Its like a habit for them.

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  • No. People can change. Also a woman can't change a man, he chooses to but I believe she could make him want to.

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    • That requires the intervention of God.

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  • I think that everyone has the ability to change. Doesn't mean that they will but they can.

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  • Some people change some don't. It is that simple.

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  • Because, generally, nobody changes.

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