When in a relationship, is it possible to notice that somebody is good looking, but not be attracted to them?

My partner said to me the other day, about his colleague's daughter, who is in her 20's, he said she is pretty.

I'm fine with that of course, there are other people who are attractive.I asked him if he was attracted to her and he said no.

He said, ''No, I realize that she is pretty, but I'm not attracted or drawn to her in any way, I have you, your the only one I'm attracted to.It's not that I can't see when someone is attractive, it's just they don't appeal to me anymore, because I've got everything I want and more in you.''

My boyfriend knows I am secure in myself and I am not bothered either way, so before you say he's just being nice or something, I don't think that's the case.

I just didn't think it was possible for men to think this way, I thought only women thought in this way.Do you think some men are more monogamous than others maybe?I don't know..


What Guys Said 2

  • we as guys have a natural inclination to notice a girl is attractive. It doesn't mean we want them over our girlfriends, we just do it. The fact that he's capable of telling that to you means he wasn't trying to hide anything, and its great that your accepting of that.

    i hate when people get in relationships and act like them and their partner can't ever find a person to be physically attractive ever again. If he said, "that girl over there is so f***ing hot" and then he went and talked to her the whole night, that's one thing.

    but if a really sexy girl pops up in front of my vision, my girlfriend can't be mad for seeing it.

    • I see what your saying, but I think you misunderstood my question, he said he realizes when women are attractive, but he doesn't feel attracted to them, he just notices when someone is pretty, but he isn't attracted to them.He doesn't think women are sexy or hot, because that would mean he's attracted to them.I don't care either way, but I was asking because I thought only women could feel like this.

    • well that's what I meant. he can see that a girl is attractive. We as guys all acknowledge that. I think that's his way of saying "a girl may be really hot but its not like I wanna go get with them or anything"

      he probably just doesn't see anyone else in a sexual way.

      with that said, any guy, single or in a long term relationship, will see a really hot girl and acknowledge her hotness. It doesn't mean their girlfriend should be threatened or anything like that.

  • I don't know your partner but if he is male, he probably found her physically attractive and nothing more. Big deal. It won't threaten the monogamy of your relationship. Are you two really honest with each other?

    • I said I don't mind about it, of course we are honest with each other.He knows I'm fine with it either way, so he wouldn't lie because he has no reason to.He said he could see she was attractive, but he wasn't drawn to her or actually attracted to her, he could just see the appeal as to why people would pursue her.I think that makes perfect sense because I feel the same, I notice guys who are attractive but I don't think their hot or anything, I just notice that their good looking.

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