First off I feel like a complete ass posting this question but I need some advice.
The girl I've been dating I really like, she's nice, funny, patient and understanding. The problem is, I'm having trouble deciding if I'm attracted to her physically.
I don't have anything else to blame but my own shallowness but I'm not sure if I find her attractive. She's slightly on the large side, she's not obese but does have a bit of extra baggage, I usually don't mind a little thickness but she's very close to the line between attractive and unattractive, which is why I'm having trouble.
Again, I have nobody to blame but myself but I'm not posting this question to get fired at because of being shallow. I want to make my relationship with her work because I know she likes me back.
She's said that she's not entirely happy with her body but isn't too subconscious about it either and like I said she's not overly heavy. I'm well aware of that unwritten rule about how never to discuss a womans weight, so I ask here, what are some subtle hints I can drop? If anything.
Again, I feel shallower than spit posting this question but I really want to make it work with her and I because I really do like her. Any ideas?
Most Helpful Girl
Are you athletic yourself? If not - there's no need for the pot to call the kettle black...
And if you are, just invite her to do something active. That's what I did with my friend and it helped get her into an active lifestyle without her knowing it. There's a game I play every weekend at this course just outside city limits... it's called disc golf. It's so much fun it hardly qualifies as exercise but it is GREAT exercise. Invite her to do something fun and make it feel like less of a pressure to lose weight and more of an invitation to spend time together.
Is it just her body? Or does she not have a cute face either? And some girls that are "overweight" are more shapely than others so it isn't as bad... I know that when I gain weight it doesn't look too horrible because of my body shape lol. So if she's one of the shapely ones, losing 10 pounds will do wonders for her.
Everyone is shallow in a sense. How long have you been dating her, or how long have you known her? If you've known her awhile and she's always been this way... and you aren't content with how she looks, you should've never dated her or you should have gotten over the fact that she is who she is and she shouldn't have to change for you.
And if you've done anything physical with her (not necessarily sex, but fooling around) maybe you shouldn't have... because that will make her think you're okay with the way she looks when you obviously aren't.1