Stop playing with your hair so much, the follicles could be flimsy enough as it is. The oils actually strengthen the hair, so if you can stand it, skip a day where you wash your hair and wash/condition it every other day. When you wash, just massage the scalp and don't run through your hair.
So the routine you try is Sunday wash/condition, Tuesday Wash/shampoo/condition, Thursday Wash/condition, etc. See how that works out for you. It shouldn't smell immediately unless you're in an environment that will pick up the scent. Otherwise, you might just be genetically inclined not to have the same lustrous hair your family does. Speak with your hair stylist, they might have products or routines to help.
I believe this can come from stress, are you experiencing a large amount of stress in your life? Also are you eating healthy? Drinking lots of water? I'm not sure, but I know that healthy living can work miracles in strange circumstances.
Its oily because you shouldn't condition with out shampooing. shampoo strips natural oil and conditioner replaces it. Think of shampoo and conditioner as salt and pepper they need to stick together. I'll give you a routine
1. Massage your scalp ( google it for good ways to do it) with shampoo and not the ends
2. condition the ends like your making a pony tail and focus on the ends then run your fingers through your hair once let it sit for a few minutes.
3. next day don't wash your hair with anything put it in a shower cap
4. wash your hair repeat steps above
6. don't wash your hair and keep repeating the dont/do/dont/do wash your hair method. it will take about 2 weeks to fully control how much oil your hair is producing as you have to train it
7. try to do as little to your hair as possible with heat products if you must make sure you use heat protectant
8. when your hair is wet don't brush it it damages it only use a wide toothed comb or wait until it is dry.
9. you will always have split ends unless you get a full hair cut because the break works their way up when the hair follical so just trim your hair often.
10. BE PATIENT it will take awhile to get your hair fuller but you can try pills like Biotin a natural ingredient to help skin and nails I also heard prenatal vitamins work for great hair but you can decide if you want those. Best of luck:)
I'd actually suggest seeing your doctor about it. They might be able to refer you to a specialist, or prescribe you a specific shampoo. Having split ends almost immediately after trimming and having an odor even when washing every-other day may be indicators for something else (I'm no doctor so don't as me what).
In the mean time, make sure to eat healthy, take in plenty of vitamins and maybe even get some supplements. There's all kinds of hairmasks out there that you can buy or make at home involving natural ingredients, but if your roots are oily you'd probably want to keep any moisturizers on the ends only.
I experienced hair loss and researched the best vitamins to combat the problem. Then some one told me that a product named Reloxe included all the safe vitamins etc. that stimulated hair growth. I tried it and they were right! Worked in about 3 months. Reloxe Stopped me from having to buy 10 or more different kinds of vitamins per month. LOL