How can you be a good flirt if you're ugly?

I'm 16 and I have never had a boyfriend or flirted with a guy:'(. I actually wanna put myself out there but I don't think I can because I do t believe I'm attractive enough. I'm also pretty tall(5'11) and most guys don't go for tall girls my age. I do find guys older than me attractive but I need help. Even if I put makeup on and and a cute outfit I always end feeling like the ugly duckling. I mostly feel this way at school not so much when I'm out at the store or somewhere. How can I put myself out there and flirt without feeling like this person thinks I'm ugly anyway so why try. And please don't say your too young because like almost everyone of my friends have had a boyfriend and a relationship and I haven't even had my first kiss.:'(


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Most Helpful Guy

  • ive never kissed a girl either and I get compliments on my looks all the time. Just because youve never been kissed doesn't make you any less of a person. When you really connect with someone it will feel more natural. On account of your attractiveness, I'm sure your a pretty girl and don't need to worry about so much. Through my experience girls I have known when they were 16 till when they graduated high school were some of the ugliest girls when they were 16 and its amazing how those types of girls transitioned. All the girls who were not as attractive, most were gorgeous and the girls who were already hot didn't necessarily get uglier, people just got used to their looks after all those years and they never really changed. Girls like you are the best at your age because you work so hard on trying to look better while the other good looking girls don't and your work pays off down the road. I know its hard but keep a positive attitude and don't worry about what other girls say now because you will be very pretty if you keep working toward it. Telling yourself your not pretty enough is a good thing because it motivates you to look better and if you keep telling yourself that you will always want more. Work on your personality and learn from older girls and you'll be fine. Its not easy watching everyone else get things while you don't but when the time comes you'll have so many boys you won't know what to do with yourself. I'm sorry to hear about your situation, I remeber feeling so sad when I was young because I thought if I wasn't going to get a girlfriend now I never will. Just hang in there :)

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    • Reading this made me smile and feel a bit better because it's exactly how I feel right now.:)

What Guys Said 5

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  • I know it seems like a big deal to you right now, but when you're older you'll see how all this worry was unnecessary. It's not your looks, it's your insecurity that makes you less attractive. Smile, relax - that will make you approachable. Learn to feel good in your skin - girls who are comfortable in their own bodies are so hot! Your height will be as big of an issue as you make it - you've got a beautiful height of a model, be proud of it! Concentrate on all the things that you like about yourself. Seriously, write down a list of all the things you like about yourself and read it every day. And most importantly - enjoy your life, don't wait for a boyfriend to come into your life to make you feel alive. Girls who look like they're waiting for a guy to fulfill their life ( or even worse to build their self-esteem) seem desperate and unattractive. Those who just live fulfilling lives whether or not they have a guy are so appealing, cause when you live a fun life people naturally want to be be a part of that life, they are attracted to your joy. When you learn to like yourself, people will respond to that, and when you become more at ease with all of this, flirting will come naturally.

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  • Attraction isn't just about appearance, it's about personality. So you can definitely be a good flirt if your personality stands out!

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    • Yea but if a girl you just saw was trying to flirtvwith you but wasn't so attractive or didn't catch your eye be honest would you give her the time of day?:(

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    • I know I shouldn't and I hope you don't think I sound stupid and insecure(well I am insecure but I hope you don't think I'm dumb) for this but I just feel like the odd one out I guess from my friends:( and it does make me feel a little icky inside knowing that I won't be loved like that or experience it. Because I'm not good enough

    • We all grow at different rates. As you mature, you'll see things differently than you do now. It'll get better.

  • its just not time yet. don't be in the rush to do things. So just take your time and it will come when you least expect it. flirting is about playing so have fun when you do it?

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  • Flirting does not mean you have to be very good looking.

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    • But if your attractive it's easier because you have a higher chance of not getting rejected:(

    • true. If I was ugly I think I would still get the ladies though

    • See you have self confidence. I don't:'( and I'm not saying it doesn't apply to guys but I feel like it's harder for girls to overcome being insecure than it is for guys.

What Girls Said 1

  • Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And I'm sure that even thought you might not like the way you look, someone does.

    Believe that you're beautiful, and you will be. Be confident, but not cocky.

    Good luck. :)

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