Guys, why do you feel the urge to check out a girl even though she is surrounded by her family?

Yesterday I was grocery shopping with my mum. I was casually dressed wearing my hair up.. Anyway, every time I passed by a guy, He was looking at me right in the eyes.. After a few of them, my mum asked "What's their problem today ? Do they have to look at you this way?"

One day, a random dude told me in the street "Hey you look amazing, you're truly perfect", OK I admit this is nice if there wasn't my grandparents AND my mum in the audience... I felt awkward and embarassed. They must have pictured me with that guy I didn't even know..

I was in England last week and NO ONE was looking at me, It was good having a break !

So guys, can't you just look away when you see a "hot chick" with her family, especially a teen ?

Okai, everyone seems to believe that I'm COMPLAINING about it. Nope, I'm not, I like getting guys attention. I just don't love it when members of my family witness it.

Thanks everyone for your answer! :)


Most Helpful Guy

  • You're gonna have to just deal with it. it's going to keep happening. they have the freedom to look at you just as you have the freedom to walk away.


What Guys Said 24

  • I don't see anything wrong with it.

    Your mother is not complaining because its inappropriate.

    Your mother is complaining because it hurts when men of all ages find your daughter more attractive than you. That's why she's upset.

    • I thought about it too !

    • Seen it happen from both sides.

      It's brutal on the mothers. The daughters are often oblivious. See what's worse is not the young guys who blatantly check you out. It's the guys her age who don't do anything inappropriate, but she can tell they notice you more than her. They pay more attention to you, smile more at you, and she's invisible. They're not doing anything odd or even that they're aware of. But she's more sensitive to it then you. She'd notice it when you wouldn't.

  • that's like asking a banana to stop being fruity, it's not gonna happen. sure, logically we can look away, but we're not gonna consciously stop looking, we're not wired that way. we're gonna look no matter what and girls do the same thing, you guys are just a little more sneaky about it

  • It's a biological instinct for guys. Are we killing you by looking? Are you injured? If you're letting it bother you, you're sweating the littlest things in life. Relax.

    • She may not be injured, but she may feel uncomfortable.

    • I've never seen a guy uncomfortable when a girl is looking at a guy's chest, a** or junk. Man or woman, when an individual looks at a member of the opposite sex (or in some cases, the same sex), it's a complement. Take it as such.

  • Most men have no boundaries, when it comes to staring. It's almost instinctual to look at what we find attractive. I'm not saying it's excusable, I'm just saying it's how most of us are. On the other hand, some of these men might have been legit. And probably were worried they may never see you again. Some were merely taking a chance.

  • "Anyway, every time I passed by a guy, He was looking at me right in the eyes"

    They looked you in the EYES?! Those perverts!

  • Cleavage, yoga pants.. Or they just feel like saying something nice without a girl being offended by some compliments.

  • They're stupid.

  • What's the big deal, some guy notices you in the grocery isle and what? If you don't like being seen, then stay in your house. People can look at whatever they want to, and just because they take notice of you of the spaghetti sauce that you happen to be standing in front of doesn't mean they want anything from you.

    Aside from all that, there's nothing wrong with talking to a girl that is with other people (family included). Talk is just talk. If someone makes an advance on you, you can reject them if you're not feeling it. I don't see what the problem is there... Thinking back I remember flirting with this girl across the dinning room of a sandwich shop years ago. She was out to lunch with her mom and dad. We caught eyes and threw smiles for a good 20 minutes while we were eating, and guess what when she went to leave, she let her parents walk out the door while she hung back and I got a chance to talk to her alone and get her number. Not all girls are paranoid like you.

    • *or

    • Show All
    • aMuse : Sometimes

      Robotic : They smiled to each other and SHE came to him. Parents or not, they didn't care.

    • She didn't come to me, she waited for me to come talk to her. At first when I was checking her out she was cautious about it and unsure, but I'm a playful guy and I guess I won her over. lol =P

  • Well at times we don't know if your family is your family, or someone your walking by, or hanging out with. Plus true beauty can't be helped to look at.

  • You feel embarrassed by them when you get checked out. Your parents embarrass you when it happens, and you're not comfortable with this. It's just part of life. You have to learn to realize that your parents are going to embarrass you the rest of your life. If they didn't, they probably wouldn't love you

  • Wear a mask next time you're out. We'll definitely stop staring, like the chainsaw massacre mask guy.

    • I'll think about it, thanks ;)

    • Lmaooooo you should watch that movie too

  • Hey of course, we're gonna look. I mean come on, what do you think we'll do? look away in fear? of course not!

  • Because we don't care where they are, if they are cute, we will check them out instictively/subconciously, no exceptions.

  • Well either those guys do not know that you are with a family member or they just do not care.

  • lol you're so full of yourself its funny, but yeah like the common consensus said... Idc if she's surrounded by her family/bf if she catches my eye Ill look. I likely won't approach if she's surrounded by people though.

    • haha can you imagine me approaching you while your dad is there? He'd beat the sh*t out of me lmao

  • yeah - why not

  • We can't control it

  • Except for that guy that complimented you, for many of us it's just 2nd nature, we don't even think about it. Why do we feel the urge? cause you're hot.

  • Yup I would check her out even if she's with her family, but if she's with her boyfriend then I'll respect that and I won't look. just chill don't want any problems because some guys are idiots. anyway...and compliments are okay

  • Frankly, we don't care. It might be weird for you, but if the guy is just checking the girl out, he doesn't see a problem at all for him. Kind of shows he has guts too.

  • Simply because...we can. We're not being disrespectful about it. We think you look good, so we want to look again.

    ESPECIALLY since we may never see you ever again in life. Let us enjoy your beauty, dammit! :)

  • I'm 23.

    16 year old girls if they are hot yes I will check them out.

    In church yes I still check girls out.

    So yes it makes no difference if they are with their family or not my eyes will wonder over and undress them.

  • In 20 years, you'll be complaining about the opposite. Stop sweating the small stuff. If a guy checks you out and that offends you...

    If that's the least of your problems, you have an easy life.

    • I'm not offended by the being checked out situation, I just feel like it's not right when my family is around. And I'd hope some of you could understand that.. Apparently not..

What Girls Said 2

  • Seriously, if you weren't getting any attention at all, that's when I'd start to complain. It's really not as huge as a deal to be worried about. The fact that you even notice these guys looking at you tells me that you're too concerned about. If it bothers you so much, don't pay them any mind and go about your day. You're not obligated to say or do anything back

  • Okay, no offense..but stop complaining about this. Maybe you are naturally good looking, or maybe you just wore a crap ton of makeup. but there are much worse problems than this.

    On the other hand... Yes, I know it is embarassing. I have been at resturaunts and the waiter would just stare at me, and it would embarass me in front of my family. same with guys whistling at you when you're with you're mom. its embarassing!

    • I'm not complaining, I'm just wondering where the respect to girls & their family went !

      Like you said, it's embarassing & worrying knowing that there's nothing we can do about it !