Any insight on why I get more male attention when I am wearing flats & am not dressed up?

I'm pretty short, 5'4" and am self-conscious about my height so have been wearing 3-4" heels every day since I was a teenager. I also usually dress up for work...wear heels and tights with dresses (mid-thigh length). I get some looks from men...not much though (especially not white men..and I'm white)...

But the past couple of days...I've been wearing flat sandals...and look what I consider bummish...but feel like I've been getting more looks from men...and have been getting more greetings...even though I look not so good...but again...the attention is mostly from black men...

Which...I don't mind that the attention is from black men, but I'm sort of wondering why this is...are white men just not interested in me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Maybe you look more approachable when you aren't dressed up. Black guys generally like white girls, so they'll try their hand at it. Also, if they are players, they'll go after the bummish type of girl because she is an easier mark than a girl that is put together.

    Do you not live in an area that has plenty of white guys in it? Do you hang around a lot of black people or black men in particular?

    It could depend on your answers or how you look and your vibe could make it seem like you prefer black men anyway. In which case, white men usually steer clear. That's just a shot in the dark though.

    • Oh I see...thanks for your answer your questions...

      I work and go to college in Detroit...and am there most of the I am around more black men than white.

      No, I don't hang around black men...but do have a couple of black friends that are friends are from all different races and ethnic backgrounds, including white.

      I don't prefer black men in terms of looking for a mate...I am open...but have always seen myself marrying a white man.


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What Guys Said 2

  • When a girl is dressed up to look professional she may look high maintenance and guys like to be taller than their girlfriends so the heels may be one reason. Do you smile at these men when they look at you? a smile can be very disarming and engaging. A lot of black guys just make more attempts in approaching women than white men.

  • I personally love short girls in flats, mainly ballerina flats they just drive me crazy, but I think flats in general make woman look more natural bring more focus to their natural beauty. Dressing up is find for special occasion but I think men love girls more when they look more natural and not overly dressed up or make up.

    • I guess that's just something I can't understand... I feel so ugly and dumpy when I wear ballerina flats... because I'm only 5'4" I feel like a midget compared to everyone else.

    • Show All
    • Thanks for your response... that makes sense.

    • You're more than welcome.

What Girls Said 2

  • I think it made you look more approachable and easy going so they felt more at ease to let their attraction be known.

  • maybe it made you look totally different or the guys you get attention from like your new "style" better.