What's your funniest fart story?

That's mine:

I was waiting for the train to come. Then suddenly I had the urge to let go of a really big fart. To be careful, I looked around wheter someone is nearby. So, I looked left and I looked right. OK, no one in near sight. So, I let it go. I reaaalllllllyyyy biigggg and nasty one. This fart was so long, even I wondered when it would stop. But when it stopped I heard a voice say: "Ewww... someone farted here.". I was like "What?!? I just checked and no one is standing next to me?". Then I turned around and looked down. There he was a little kid I hadn't noticed because he was so small. Appearenty I farted right into his face.

But luckily he was just a little kid and no one is believing him. XD

What's your funny fart story?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • lolol lmao I just laughed out loud...

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What Girls Said 8

  • lmao

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  • That it so funny...I can not top that, LOL.

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  • One day when I was 15, I was wearing lowrise jeans and exposing my buttcrack without noticing. I realized that cuz my big brother and his friends said "your buttcrack is showing" and laughed at me. Then I had an idea... I stood up and told them "do you wanna see it more closely?" So I unzipped jeans to expose my whole bare ass and fart just in front of them. Maybe due to the smell of my fart those 3 boys became speechless lol.

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  • i was changing in the closet...till boyfriend walked in and grabbed all the perfumes/colognes. he let out a huge fart and closed the door on me haha

    it smelt like onions! the ones that burn your nose lol

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  • ROFL you made me laughed

    I cannot top yours too sir

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  • I once coughed and farted at the same time while talking to someone, oops lol.

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  • It was on New Years of 2012, I was recording the ball drop and a fart slipped out...

    Go on YouTube and watch : New york city 2012 new year fart LOL

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    • And those are my brothers in the background lol I had the first fart of the new year in my house...

    • New York City 2012 new year fart :P and "first fart of the new year" Hahaha I love this :) Who says girls can't fart? :)

  • In middle school, I was in an absolutely dead silent library with a friend. My friend told me a joke which made me laugh. You know how when you laugh, your farts like..squeeze out? Well...I would hold my gas in during class, so all that built up gas just came out all at once. Then 2 boys walked in and went "WHAT THE HELL?!" which only made me laugh more, thus making me fart more, so it just came out like BOOM BOOMBOOM BOOOOOM BOOOOM. Everyone kept running from me going "EEW", meanwhile I hid behind a bookshelf, because I was absolutely mortified.

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What Guys Said 7

  • I was at the office in a meeting with the president of our company and I meant to cut a very small fart, but before I knew if a torrent of putrid, runny feces burst forth from my bung hole saturating the chair and forming a pudding-like puddle on the floor around me. I of course had to go home and change my suit and also had to walk by everyone in the outer office drenched in my own feces. They were never able to remove the stain from the bosses office.

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  • I know this is an old question but I just had to answer. Anyway my funniest fart story was when I was in the library at university and I was sitting next to this pretty girl. I got gas and had to fart so I lent to one side, lifted a butt check and farted. To add to the whole experience I did a long loud fart right next to her, everyone in that part of the library heard and looked at me. The girl packed her stuff up and left, so my fart scared her away.

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  • Yours cannot be topped. Great story

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  • While studying in an absolutely silent library, this hot girl let one rip -- hard wood chair. It was like BAM! I did not know what to say, so I stayed silent. It was a BIG table, so I was not close enough to smell it. She stayed silent too. After awhile, it was like nothing happened. I don't think she did it on purpose?

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    • Woods crackle you know. Sometimes they do sound like fart. ... or... she knew what you're into and tried to seduce you with that.

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    • Ya I mean -- if you see it written here -- seems odd. But during the height of passion when a girl pushes one out during anal sex? It can be amazing. Always makes me go harder and deeper.

    • True. Sometimes I wish I can inhale the scent of a goddess. Do you sometimes dreaming of eating the sh!t of a hot girl?

  • I was 8 and was a soccer. Anyways, I had an upset stomach before the game but went out and played anyway.

    Partway through the game, I felt the urge to fart. So I started to fart, but realized too late that it was more than that. I ended up soiling my boxer shorts and soccer uniform pretty badly in front of everyone. I was so embarrassed because, of course, everyone saw. I threw my uniform and boxer shorts away and went home commando in my street clothes.

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  • I had to let out a fart. I knew it was a noisy one; sometimes you can just tell. Anyway it was during a written assignment in high school, so the classroom was silent. I decided I could "accidentally" knock a couple books off my desk and time the fart so that the noise would be masked by the books hitting the floor. I started to let it out and then let the books hit. My timing was a bit off...the books hit the floor, the whole class turned to look in my direction. As everyone looked at me, only then did I let out one of those shrieking, leaking, whiny balloon farts. Some laughed, some groaned in disgust. Everyone hated me about 10 seconds later because of the smell. That affected my grade in that particular assignment, and I'm sure I had some collateral damage from distracting my fellow classmates.

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  • Valentines Day. Several years ago. I had taken my girlfriend at the time out to a nice restaurant for dinner. We go back to my place and we start doing it. We're having really good sex. Working through the progressions, changing positions, I'm holding on--all is good. I'm banging her from behind and we're both really getting into it. Then it happens. She absolutely rips one. We're talking SUPER loud. So loud for a second there I'm worried that she may have shit my bed. When it becomes clear she hasn't I'm totally relieved and I start laughing my ass off. Unfortunately she's super embarrassed and it totally takes her out of the sexy mood. But I thought it was so freaking funny I actually didn't mind. I basically had a laugh-gasm!

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