Why does everybody call me a shallow bitch when I'm being honest?

There's this guy who has wanted me to be my boyfriend since June. He's taken me out to dinner at least 10 times, he bought me three birthday presents and he's very sweet and respectful. However, I have given him a chance and no matter how many dates we go on, or what kinda gift he gives me; I don't like him.

Everybody is like, he treats you like a princess, he's a fantastic guy, he does so much for you! But, the reality of it is no matter how many dates we go on, or what kinda gifts he gives me, I can't get past how he dresses and his of physical fitness. This is the part where everybody calls me a shallow bitch. Really? To me I don't think I'm a shallow bitch, it's called preference! I'm going to college to study fitness and personal training. I want a man who takes care of his body. Besides that he dresses like a gangster, Big baggy pants, long shirts, thug like style. I hate the way he dresses! When I'm with a guy I wunna get that natural high feeling when he approaches me! When you see the person you like and you get all excited seeing them? I feel turned off when I see him. We should not go out! He deserves someone who is going to accept him for who he is and won't want to change him (that's not me)! He's not my type and I'm really honest about it to my friends and they call me a shallow bitch!

Some people like to go out with blonde haired girls, is that shallow because someone prefers something physical over another? I'm on the verge of telling him I'm bi curious and I wunna start talking to girls. But, that's practically the truth, except I'm leaving out the part where I'm not attracted to him.

What should I do?

Updates:
I wish I could show you guys the photo of us together. I'm wearing a belly shirt and my toned stomach is showing while his belly fat is folded into his shirt to prevent it from spilling out. Like, I'm sorry if I'm a shallow bitch but, if he wants to go out with me he needs to lose weight. Because I don't want to be with someone who is heavy set. I'm going to school to be a personal trainer! I can't help him lose weight or try to make him ( now THAT would be a bitch move ). He's gotta do.
People! I didn't MAKE him do ANYTHING! He did everything on his own and I was passive about my feelings.
I came here looking for help, I came here looking for answers. I want to do the right thing but most of the answers I got people are disrespecting me and calling me mean names. Like wtf? I didn't come here to get cursed at and disrespected. I want to do the wrong thing. Thank you for pointing out my error but can you people actually HELP?


I posted this question explaining how everybody calls me a bitch and what kind answers do I get? that I'm a bitch? WTF!

0|0
5|6

Most Helpful Girl

  • It was very rude of you to accept 10 dinners and the gifts when you know you don't like him. You knew after one date, don't lie. You're not a very nice person and you should be ashamed for having taken advantage of someone who is clearly fond of you and putting forth a lot of effort to gain your affection. Quit being a user.

    0|2
    0|0
    • It's so funny you should say that I'm not a very nice person. That's the opposite of what everybody in my life thinks of me. The one time I'm honest I'm this horrible person. Maybe I should keep my feelings to myself. People seem to like it better when I don't speak my mind.

    • Show All
    • Just tell him you really liked getting to know him but that you want to date other people. That simple

    • Good answer,almost the same as mine!

What Guys Said 6

  • You shuldn't have accepted the gifts and all the dinners. that is called 'eading himon.' Now it's going to be hard to tell him you don't even like him; it will come as a shock, if not a slap in the face.

    It's shallow to lead a guy on like that, imao.

    The soone ryou break it off the bettter, but I almost think you're right to make up something like being bi curious. Thatwouldn't hurt his feelings so much.



    But, aside from that part, you do have a perfect right to have your preferences, no matter how well he treats you.

    It's just that you should have made your preferences clear in the beginning!

    0|0
    0|0
    • Im not making it up lol I actually want to start talking to women.

  • I'd just go after whoever I want to go after, you don't want to date someone because other people think it's a good idea. Plus they're taking your relationship at face value, they only see that side of things... they obviously don't know how you feel. Everyone is shallow, nobody dates someone they're not attracted to (for any length of time anyway), just because someone likes a chubbier person, or a less educated person doesn't make them less shallow, they're still dating people they're attracted to, I mean I've dated beautiful girls and people never get over how they physically look, and I'm thinking, yes they're very attractive but they're not just that one thing, they're also very smart and very funny... Just because someone can look closer to the media definition of attractive doesn't mean they can't be nice people or have good personalities.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It seems that people on this site are giving you mixed emotions I guess you really shouldn't have taken that far If you're not planning on a serious relationship

    0|0
    0|0
  • I think you're correct in your assessment of the situation. You shouldn't go out and he doesn't mesh with you. No one is wrong, or a bitch, or an idiot here; sometimes that's just how human pairings work.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Passive action is action. Never forget this; you can be judged for doing nothing.

  • I don't know but where I come from when people use people, they're shallow. Don't know about the bitch part because I don't know you but from what your friends say, I guess they know you best.

    0|0
    0|0
  • When you're making that judgement based on superficial things (which he could change), then that is practically the definition of being shallow.

    Look, he could change his dress style. He could get fit. Those things are easily fixable. But you won't even tell him he should do that. You just judge and dismiss.

    If I was to say I didn't like you because you were black, I'd be a racist. It's by definition.

    If I was to say I didn't like you because you were too thin, I'd be superficial.

    Again, it's practically in the definition.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 4

  • You should've told him the truth from the beginning. That you're one of those girls that can't get over how someone looks. It sounds like you are using him because he did all those nice things for you hoping that he'd be your boyfriend when you knew all along that it would never happen. Telling him that you're bi curious is taking the easy way out. That guy deserves to know the truth.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I know everybody thinks I'm a total bitch but, I actually care about his feelings. We were friends long before he told me he liked me. I don't want to hurt his feelings.

  • Here's what you do, fuck all of those bitches! If you don't want to be with him then that's your choice. if they love all the stuff he does and the way he looks then they can go date him themselves!

    0|0
    0|0
  • wow 10 dinners? Poor guy

    0|1
    0|0
  • I think it's wrong to accept gifts and lead him on if you know it's not gonna work out.

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...