Why can't skinnier people be self conscious?

Why is it that when someone who isn't that skinny asks if they look okay that its fine, but when someone skinnier asks then they are fishing for compliments? So people who aren't in shape can have self esteem issues or be uncertain with how they look but in shape people can't? What's wrong with getting peoples opinions or getting a little reassurance?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Skinny people with body issues can ask if they look ok, but doing so in the presence of a fatty is somewhat insensitive. It's like the teenage girl freaking out over one pimple, when her friend beside her has massive acne problems all over her body.

    The scenario you are illustrating is one where a person complains about an issue that is of small magnitude, within earshot of someone who is having the same issue, but at a huge magnitude. You are sure to get the scorn of others who are having the same problem, but to a much larger degree than you.

    Today, this scenario goes far beyond "earshot". Bloggers and posters who complain about small problems online, will likely be swarmed with the millions of people who come across the blog who have bigger issues.

    Bottom line is, don't complain online. You won't get any sympathy. Lots of trolls out there, and really, the opinion of faceless anonymous people are irrelevant.

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    • That makes a lot of sense. I believe I have that I have a very fortunate life. I really don't have many problems or hardships, especially compared to many others. It just seems like because others view me as having nothing to complain about then I have to act like nothing bothers me. Act as if I don't get self conscious or doubts.

    • People who get the most respect in this world are the ones who don't complain.

      That does not mean that things don't bother you. It means that you are capable of handling anything life throws at you without creating panic to the people surrounding you.

      Ever have someone at work who complains constantly about work or their life? Or freaks out at the most minor of issues? They are viewed as a loser by their peers.

      In contrast, if you have a boss who is always calm and composed. Who never complains and always leads the charge forward, that type of personality gains respect.

What Guys Said 3

  • because people expect you to already know that you look good, nothing more to it.

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  • Because it almost is always fishing.

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  • It comes down to jealousy. Nothing more, nothing less.

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What Girls Said 7

  • I don't know… there's nothing wrong with it per se… but a lot of the time it seems fake. it really depends on how someone delivers it. like i HATE it when skinny girls r like, "omg I'm so fat haha" …. like what do u want us to do, shower u with reassurance?

    i personally believe that anyone can be insecure about anything, no matter how u look or feel. I'm just explaining it based on certain experiences iv had

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  • Because of the stereotype that skinny people are attractive so whenever someone complain about it, they will be assumed as fishing for a compliment. Though some of these girls really self conscious, people never want to bother sympathize her just because she fit the beauty standard.

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  • well a lot of people assume attractive people know they're attrative. And I know that's not always true, especiallly for younger girl, but when I see some of those questions, the pictures they link to clearly show that they know what they have. Like the girl in your profile picture, she's beautiful and she knows it, otherwise she wouldn't have taken a picture like that.
    And then there are those questions like "I'm 110lbs, have a thin waist, big bum and big boobs, am I still attractive?" I mean really? That one really is just fishing for compliemnts

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    • I am the girl in my profile pic.

    • well ok I didn't want to jump to conclusions, because a lot of people take pictures of strangers. I stand by what I said tho

  • I know how it is. I used to be kinda big and in finally lost it all.. almost too much apparently. But I still feel big.
    And for those who have always been skinny and can't gain weight.. I know them too. It's equally a struggle.

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  • I'm skinny too I guess but I don't know people are like that to me too. Sometimes I feel pressured to go on diets too because all my friends are. They always get mad at me when I say that they are lucky because they're healthy while I'm underweight.

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  • I hate that. I'll ask if I look okay and there's always one girl that has to switch it around on my and accuse me of fishing for compliments. She's usually fat too..

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    • I know generally speaking, when anyone asks for appearance on any aspect of their physical appearance, skinny or not skinny, aren't they ultimate just looking for positive feedback. When someone thinner does it then all it is is a shallow attempt at getting compliments instead of just looking for honest feedback. Its almost a double standard.

    • *asks for opinions

  • I'm with you girl, it's like if other think you're thin.. you better think it too or you're full of sht and asking for compliments... but that's crap bc most girls think they are fat, even if they aren't.

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