I was on the internet earlier and came across a post bringing up the fact that looks do matter, at least in a relationship. It got sort of a mix of responses, most people agreeing with it but a few saying otherwise.
Personaly, I think you have to be at least a bit physically attracted to someone to want to go out with them (Unless your pansexual, in which case, looks really don't matter to you). Of course that's not to say you have to look like a Victoria Secret or Calvin Klein model for people to find you attractive. Beauty is subjective, we all have different tastes - Me and my friend used to talk to each other about our crushes and when I saw hers, I only thought them average or unattractive, whereas she found them hot. Then when I said someone was cute, she would say "Yuck!".
Some people are into blondes, with others it's brunettes, redheads or other hair colours. Some like freckles, others don't. Some like glasses, some don't. Some like curly hair, some prefer straight. Some like skinny, some like curvy. Some like blue eyes, others prefer brown, green or grey and so the list goes on.
I'm not saying personality doesn't matter, of course it does - You wouldn't want to be stuck with someone mean or who you don't get on or have any chemistry with. I am just saying that physical attraction does matter, it is usually what draws us to a person at first. You don't look around the room and decide to get to know everyone as a potential love interest, I mean who would you start with? You usually pick one or at least a small number of people you are physically attracted to to get to know as a potential love interest. Then if you don't get on with that person or they are horrible, you move on to someone else. If they are nice but you have no chemistry then you may be friends with that person but probobly not close. If on other hand, that person is nice, you get on with them, you have chemistry and they like you back.. You can get into a relationship (So long as your both single, but then you shouldn't have been looking in the first place if you weren't, naughty naughty!).
And if someone has a nice personality and you get on but don't find them physically attractive, well then you can be friends.
Some people feel guilty about not fancying someone just because they have a nice personality, they feel bad because they think they are being shallow but the thing we need to think of is that we can't control who we like. We can control who we go out with but not who we find attractive.
If I could control who I fancied I would have got my first boyfriend a lot sooner than I did. But I simply can't. I have tried to control it before, when a nice guy who I didn't find physically appealing liked me and I tried so hard but I just couldn't like him back that way. You can't force yourself to fancy someone.
Would you be happy being with someone you didn't find mentally and physically attractive though? Wouldn't it just be gross when they kissed you and uncomfortable being with them? And would you really want to be with someone who didn't find you physically appealing? Wouldn't that just wear down on your self confidence? Knowing that someone else out there would find you mentally and physically attractive? Who would be more than happy to hug and kiss you without squirming?
The point I am trying to make in this take is that we shouldn't feel guilty for who we do and don't find physically attractive as we can't help it and should not feel bad for wanting to be with someone we like the look of. Personality is very important too but I don't think we should lie to ourselves and say looks don't play a part in a relationship too.
Sorry for any grammar mistakes and I hope you enjoyed reading.
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