Nothing pisses me off more than when someone tells me to, "let him go to you, don't do anything... if he likes you, he'll go to you." For me it's like saying, "guys like girls who put ZERO effort in talking to them, it's attractive." I can't tell how many times people have told me that texting/talking to him first is WRONG. Why? Why is that wrong? Why is me wanting to talk to someone wrong and shunned upon? Texting is like talking in person, except, you're using a gadget to communicate rather than hearing their voice and seeing their face. I understand if you're the only one putting in a LARGE majority of the effort in and he isn't, yeah, don't do anything. Wait for him. If he's not returning the favor, don't bother with him anymore. It should be an equal balance between the guy and lady, 50/50.
I get that a lot of us girls don’t want to come off needy or desperate, but I don’t see what’s so desperate about talking to a guy you like. Are you sending him a million back-to-back text messages everyday? No. Are you asking him to marry you? No. So what’s the big deal then? If she’s not sending a million text messages a day, and she’s just being friendly, what’s so bad about that? That not only puts a lot of unnecessary stress on guys who are "supposed" to talk to us first, but to the ladies who don't want to get nailed and get called, "needy or desperate" for talking to him first.
I just don't understand why it ALWAYS has to be the guy who does everything. Ask her out, call her, text her, take her out, the damn shebang! Why is all of that responsibility and pressure always put on him? Gentlemen, doesn’t the idea of you having to be the one to initiate everything bother you? I mean, I can only imagine how it must make you guys feel. It must be really hard, am I right? It has to be just as hard for you as it is for ladies who REALLY want to talk to you. NOT every guy is bold like that, a lot of guys are shy and sometimes, the girl has to be the one to talk to him or nothing else will happen for either party. And don't tell me that, "if he really liked you, shy or not, he'll make an effort." Ummm.. Not really. Just because a guy doesn't go to you first or make the first move, doesn't mean he doesn't like you or doesn't want to try, he's probably as nervous as she is. Remember, guys are people with feelings too.
The guy I like in my class right now, yeah, he didn’t even notice me the beginning of the term. Never noticed me, didn’t know I even existed. He's the type of person who speaks when spoken to, and seems to be the type of person who you have to talk to first before they feel comfortable and eventually talk to you first. Guess what I did? I changed that right away. You know what I did? I went up to him and made him aware of my presence. Guess what happened next? Now, we goof around in class and bullshit like nerds, and we’re homies. We talk normally now but he still doesn't text me first yet, which may happen soon. My point is, if I hadn’t approached him, he would have ZERO idea that I even existed.
I’m not going to be a hypocrite and say that I don’t feel nervous trying to text or talk to the guy I like. I do feel nervous, I am afraid of messing up, but does that stop me from talking to him in person or in text? No. Cause if he liked me back, he’s probably just as scared as me. If he doesn’t, well shit. Can’t please everybody.
Any thoughts on this? I wrote this merely from my experiences and views AND opinions on this issue.
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