The Reason Why I'm Not Attractive

[princesskayle]

In my early day's boys were disgusting. They had germs and were gross. Then I started to look at them differently. I started feeling this way that I had never felt before. I was intrigued by them rather than being disgusted. I'm still disgusted but it lessened for the most part. Occasionally especially online that won't be the case and I will be extremely repulsed. However, most guys aren't bad.

However in middle school and now high school I've noticed something. I don't get approached as much as normal girls do. I looked a lot to see if it was my personality, my race, my figure or what exactly it was.

I also talked to some people. Some guys especially that I actually got to talk to. I realize when I do talk to them it doesn't last long. I'm not the most confident in myself. Whether it be appearance, personality, or just my being. I realized that I would talk negatively about myself. I think it drove them to leave. I just don't know how not to. I've never felt that I was ok. Not even beautiful or flawless or anything like that. I've never felt just okay or good.

That's my fault and I know. I have a lot to work on especially in the confidence area but I'm young. I just think that also is the reason why I sometimes search for validation. Sometimes you need a little extra from others to let you know you look good. I know I look good but it hurts inside when another girl just gets told she looks nice and I put in work and it's like nothing.

I know I shouldn't rely on it but it's not for others to notice you trying to look nice. I recently started to do my eyebrows resembling Instagram-like brows. I got a few compliments from girls and that was cool. I really appreciate it. It got me thinking maybe I don't put enough work in by myself for me to be noticed. I end up blending in with every other girl and not being an individual.

There was this one guy who an ex-friend told me like me. I was shocked. Is someone liking me? That would never happen in a billion years. I'm just blah. He hasn't said anything to me. He's cute but I know nothing will ever happen because I doubt he'll approach me and I don't have enough confidence to even talk to him. It's sad and he sits next to me in a class.

I've realized that guys don't approach me because of my insecurities and my race. I'm not looking for validation on that aspect. It is what it is. I thought it wasn't the case but it is. I constantly get told you're cute but I don't date black girls. Or you're cute for a black girl, thinking that is a compliment. It's not for anyone wondering. Nothing wrong with having a 'preference' and I put that in quotes because it's an excuse. A preference is liking something over something else. What is not a preference is saying that I look like ugly and putting me down because you like white girls. If you like them fine just don't put me down is all I ask.

My personality also isn't sweet and submissive. I'm not the nicest all of the time. I'm more of the sarcastic time. I'm very humorous and I'm not the type of person who is usually serious. I'm not the most proper person when I'm not needed to be. I'm not the girliest either. I guess I'm strange.

To wrap this up the reason guys don't approach me is because of my insecurities, my appearance, and my personality. Feel free to give your opinions below as long as they are relative to the post. Thanks for reading ~ Princess Kayle

[juststrollin]

Someone told told me i was beautiful... but dark. online over messaging They might as well just said black. I relate to the feeling I did'nt know I was hot or beautiful until this year too or just how much. I think its a personal thing. These guys are normally weird I think the majority of people just see beauty for what it is and I think this happens to us... a lot.. And you are gorgerous! I think you have the looks of a runway model :3
I got told i was pretty for a black girl when I was 14 on a train from school with my friends in highschool. One of them remebered that and messaged me sorry they didn't speak up but honestly, those kinds of guys are weird. Its like would see a perfect gourmet piece of cake with rasperrys whipped cream and chocolate mousse and say, its... too... dark? its just weird. You look very tall and slender and if you dress it the right way, Im sure you can be seen as an elegant beauty who can put anyone to shame^^. I am petite slightly curvy so so I feel less societally beautiful.

I think its because we let them. And who is this guy to tell you what is beautiful and why do they matter... I am queit too sometimes and I notice that when i got sad and lost confidence, its like guys who prefferref black women, would just start disrespecting me, by grabbing my shoulders, being touchy and following me. It was heartbreaking. I lost weight again and fixed myself and these guys were scared. I told 2 of them to get lost and called one of them out for harassing me. I knew if I was a small white or Asian girl they wouldn't had felt so able to just pick on me and they didn't expect me to call them creeps or tell them to leave me alone. We are too passive and need to be less begging for our beauty to be noticed and declare it. You can do it, and no wait you have to. Or bt told that and if a guy says that again make sure you let him know he doesn't have a chance with you. Laugh at him and say no thanks. Other girls do that too and sometimes guys go after pretty girls with low self esteem (i know in just a year i gained 10 lb and wore really loose clothing and didn't talkt o people) they really seek it out. So yeah we are black and its what makes us beautiful and its the symettry of your face the curve of your nose and lips and if we werent black, we wouldn't look beautiful like we are so just honestly let them know you already know you're beautiful <3
The opinion of those you find admirable inside and out are the only ones that matter ;) <3

[princesskayle]

Thank you for this. That's not me in the photos I was going to but then I was a bit worried and I'm the most confident with strangers. But thank you again for the comment.

[johnmichaei]

Why not real pic

[dwhttydfan10]

Oooh your fifteen so that is in itself a problem. High school is tricky because everyone is discovering new feelings like you said you were in terms of finding boys less disgusting. I myself had a very hard time in high school with girls for some of the same perceived issues you have with boys your age. What are you looking to accomplish with your new found feelings and musings? Male-acknowledgement? or a relationship with one? If it is option 1 then I am sorry but guys, especially your age, don't notice make-up or primping when applied but notice when it is missing thus making any attempts to "spruce-up" your image go unnoticed in most cases. You mentioned you are not one of the usual girls in your school, so you go unnoticed by guys. Don't feel too bad by this as most guys your age will complement a girl to get something, while it does happen, very rarely will you find a compliment just for compliments sake. If option two then take some time to really figure out why you are attracted to the guys you like as it may not be for the reasons you think and you could save yourself a lot of heartache. I am surprised by your level of analysis of your social group and the setting you find yourself in, this is a good skill to have later. Eventually it gets better (not easier) but in won't be through high school in most cases. This next part might seem like I am being selfish and talking about myself but all I can offer you is my personal experience to better help you understand the other gender. I was the typical geek in high school complete with glasses, minus the pocket protector. I came from a broken home (a trend unfortunately on the rise) and know now that I looked to a girlfriend role to fill the void caused by my dad. I am willing to put money on it that a few of the guys around you are going through something similar and they just can't put it in to words, if they didn't have this issue they might be a little more open to stepping outside their comfort zone or "preferred" (I use this very loosely as I can find no better word) types and date/look at you. Attraction is completely subjective and is influenced by many factors for both genders. Even though it offers no useable comfort, I recognize your efforts to try to be noticed by others and want to give you a digital hug ***Hug*** good luck to you :)

[Idonthaveausername]

I love this comment! Everything changes after highschool, and I mean absolutely EVERYTHING. I never had a boyfriend or even a crush in highschool and kids picked on me all the time. I just turned 22 and started dating my first boyfriend, and nothing in my life is anything like it was 4 years ago. I have to agree with this guy that teenagers don't fully​understand their problems in life or why they're attracted to someone, so you shouldn't be worrying yourself with this because it will all change in a couple of years

Your insecurity is the biggest turnoff for guys. Everything else about you is fine and not keeping you from finding a boyfriend. You need to love yourself first if you want someone to be able to love you, so you need to crush those insecurities. Like you said yourself, people think you're cute (for a black girl) but that means you're​ cute and someone who thinks you're cute (not just for a black girl) will come into your life

[hellionthesagereborn]

Race isn't as much of a factor as you might think. My friend was never into black women until he started dating black women. The fact is we associate positive traits of groups with positive experiences. So that's the real issue, black culture tends to show black women as aggressive, confrontational etc. and that's what makes a lot of guys not interested. But that's also something that can be fixed if you so choose. Also the confidence issue is your main issue more then likely as that is a massive turn off. Nothing is more frustrating then trying to talk to some one who is constantly brining you down. I want to be happy not miserable and so I will stay away from people who are perpetually miserable. That guy who likes you, why not approach him? I mean the fact is black women are the least likely group to date outside of their race, you don't hear about black women being interested in white guys either so for all the "racial" issues your having wit this they are experiencing the same. The issue is you don't appreciate yourself which of course how can you ever have a functional relationship under those conditions? I mean your asking for a guy to love you when you don't love you, that sends a message to him that since you know yourself better then he does then their must be something wrong with you if you are so insistent about it so they stay away. Then you will have the issue that if a guy likes you and you don't like yourself you will always doubt him and that will also drive him away. So work on attitude and then consider if culture (because that's the real issue, yes black women have different body types then white but so do Asians and Hispanics and that doesn't seem to be an issue right?) is the issue i. e. are you doing things that are stereotypical black woman things (and I am not saying its all back women, as stated its a culture but I do know that their is a bit of a culture and what is represented is that black women always have an attitude and are always distrusting etc. all of which are very unappealing. That also becomes the archetype of black women for those people with minimal interaction with black women which is also something you will have to break through, to show that is not how you are which in turn will give them more of a reason to see where things may go with you.).

[SmartButBroke]

This is an excuse and the very typical "pass the blame to black women" thing that everyone always does. The simple fact of the matter is it's VERY obvious black women like white men. Any white guy who likes black women, if he goes to an interracial group or site online, he will find himself completely outnumbered by black women and will have his pick. And you'll find more "do white guys like black women" questions online, including on GAG, than "do black girls like white guys" questions. I don't see myTakes from white guys about "black women won't date me," and if a white guy did write one he'd get many responses from black girls saying they like white guys, not from black girls telling them it's their fault or they're "overthinking" or from other races talking about they have it "far worse." No one has commented that they like black girls as I write this.

Race is *totally* a factor for white men, whether a black woman is "aggressive" or otherwise stereotypical, or not.

[SmartButBroke]

Excuse me, one person said they like black women after telling her it's her own fault, lol.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@SmartButBroke No, that's not true at all, what your doing is in fact passing the blame, your saying its all their fault and therefore I don't have to do anything to make my feelings known or to change my approach etc. Hell I have even heard complaints from black guys that black women don't like them, that they only like a very specific type of guy (according to them the women use the term "street" what ever that means), again statistically black women are far less likely to date outside their race then any other group. White men and black men are the most likely to date outside their race. Again this is just an excuse. But you are right it is a factor, for instance you just belittled whites attacked white men and that's something that keeps a lot of white men at bay, the racism the attacks and open hostility as you have shown. No one wants that. As I said its not a huge factor, for some it might be but not in general, statistically speaking, its primarily cultural.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@SmartButBroke Yes its true not many said they like black women, but none of them said they didn't and in fact pointed out that the problem is her fault, that is as she pointed out that it was her insecurities that where the issue so that kind of proves that you are wrong. When a woman acts hostile towards a person they are unattractive, again not unlike what you are doing its an attack and its unattractive and this is how most black women are represented and to be honest more then a few black women represent themselves (as you are doing), that's whats unattractive, the behavior not the being of a different ethnicity (again whites are more likely to date outside of their ethnicity more then any other group and black women are the least likely to date outside of their race so clearly saying its all white mens fault is kind of an absurd notion). Also yes, peoples behavior makes them unattractive, why would you argue otherwise? Do you think existing should be enough?

[princesskayle]

The whole hostile thing is not the problem. Black women could be quiet and if one gets loud or violent everyone gets generalize. I don't act "hood" but I get generalized and people act like I am or I will be because I look like them. THat's not fair. I'm not complaining but rather pointing things out. Race is a huge factor sadly. People won't talk to you because of your skin complexion. People won't date you etc so many people have biases. This was not about race. It was an example and a subreason. It's not the main reason but it does effect things whether you want to believe it or not.

[princesskayle]

It's not black culture. It's just culture, it's American culture. In American media, you tend to see lighter skin girls black girls or mixed girls if they're not white. Whenever a brown skin or dark skin girls are shown most likely it's negative. Whether it's a role, the media, etc. The media puts that out. It's not just blacks that are the problem. Everyone that's not trying to help the problem isn't helping either. White people perpetuate stereotypes as well blacks do it too but race wasn't the whole reason. I don't get why people lack on to what they want rather then the main idea

[hellionthesagereborn]

Never said they don't get generalized (in fact I stated as much). But your not the only one who gets generalized, every one does for one thing or another. Hell you generalized (as well as @SmartButBroke ) white men by stating that they didn't want to date you because of your race. That's a generalization. So how can you do that and then be upset when others do the same thing to you? That's why I said you have to go the extra mile to prove whom you are, that you are not that way etc. Never said it would be easy only that it wasn't the primary factor and in fact is probably the easiest to overcome. As for the negative portrayal of blacks, are you suggesting that their isn't a reason for it? That out of everything that is put out their that their is absolutely no merit to it? That is an absurd notion, it may be a generalization but that doesn't mean its not rooted in truth. Its not every one but its common enough that this is how blacks are perceived.

[hellionthesagereborn]

The fact is your behavior is showing at least some of the reasons why race is probabaly at least some what of an issue, and that is accountability. If you immediately attack white then of course your not going to be seen as attractive by them, if they are the ones being prejudice for having a generalized perception of blacks rather then acknowledging that their is in fact a reason for that perception that tells them that if they date you its just going to be trouble, its going to be you attacking them them trying to watch what they say always worried you will take what they said out of context. That's not attractive to anybody, admit their is some problems within the black community (they are) admit that yes to some degree the stereotypes are true and then you will be much more at peace with the situation. You don't hear white people claim everything said about them is false, why make the claim about blacks? Acknowledge the problem to solve the problem, that is all I am saying.

[hellionthesagereborn]

As for your other comment, I did mention your other issues, in fact I just pointed out that race was not in and of itself the problem, that your confidence was the issue, that it could be that your not sending the right signals, that it could be that they are thinking exactly what you are thinking that you would never date them because of their race, that it could be that their is fear of the stereotype of black women and that it might require that you show that you are not the case, that you could provide a positive experience for them as we tend to associate good things and happiness with the characteristics of those who created those positive feelings. As I said my friend was never interested in black women until he dated one, now with the positive experience he is far more open to dating black women, he finds them attractive etc. I covered all points presented, your the one fixating. Making race an issue is a huge turn off for white guys.

[princesskayle]

No making it a race issue isn't a problem. You can be naive if you want to think the race isn't an issue in America. People will tell you that they don't like you just because you're black. They stereotype you no matter what. It doesn't matter what you look like you can still be loud and ignorant. Sterotyping doesn't help anyone. You're part of the problem for generalizing and then trying to ignore the problem. Please get off of my post because if you don't want to read or don't get the point leave. Race isn't the biggest issue but it is an issue. People say no to you not because of how you act but how you look. I could be the most polite but people will still think I'm "ghetto" because of the way I look. It has nothing to do with anything but that. You can make excuses all you want but you need to face the truth and to stop running from it.

[curlycurvesxx]

I went through the exact same thing as you at one stage.
I hated my big lips, my tanned skin and curly hair because I thought it was the reason why I wasn't being approached by boys.
Now I'm in my 20s and I haven't thought negatively about myself since. When I was 13, I saw the girls with long blonde hair and blue eyes, I envied the white girls in my class.
After I turned 15, I learnt to flaunt what I had - Now I see those very same girls having lip injections and curling their hair every weekday.

The point of what I'm saying is that you shouldn't be against yourself because of boys. From the moment that I started looking in the mirror and saying "I love the shape of your lips, the tone of your skin and the way your eyelashes curl" I started seeing changes in the way others saw me.
I went through a phase of thinking of nothing BUT boys! It drove me crazy because I would always have a crush on a guy who I thought was out of my league. Adults, my mother in particular, would always tell me that I'd find something more important than boys; I just laughed, but it's true now!
At your age there is a race to find a boyfriend, don't compete in that race! Focus on your education, believe me! I spent so many years fixing my hair and makeup instead of staying home and studying - it didn't stop me from succeeding but I wish I'd used my time and energy for school.
I think that EVERY black girl has felt ugly next to a white girl at some point in life. Look at the media now, girls tan their skin and inject shit into their butts to give the shape and features of a black woman. Black women dye their hair blonde and bleach their skin to appear white - no one is ever happy so just be happy in your own body.

Having attention from the boys each and every day will make you blind to the genuine guys - you just need to remember not to take the first offer without knowing if the guy is good or not.
If you're anything like me, being ignored by boys at a young age will make you savage and independent when you're older. Boys will ask you out and most likely be afraid to ask you because you will develop a stern exterior.
All I suggest to you is that you think sensibly, look after yourself and love the way you're made. People who hate themselves are less likely to be loved by others because it shows in the way you walk and talk.

I once wrote the same article as you, I still have mine and I read it back now and then, and smile to myself knowing that things have changed amazingly!

[Schrodingerscat]

This is just sooo... relatable.
I don't get approached as much as other girls either. A big part of it lies in the fact that my social circle is pretty small and I don't use Facebook or Instagram that much. It plays a big role in people approaching you.
Another part being my looks and behavior. I am just average (below average to some even) and tbh I don't put in much efforts in makeup and cosmetics.
I was a tomboy in my teen years and even though I'm more feminine now, I still have that tomboyish streak. Although I think I'm pretty nice and submissive.

So to sum it up, I could relate to it a lot. Good job there 😇. And yes, accept your flaws and try to accentuate your decent qualities. That's what I *try* to do

[princesskayle]

Thank you. I really appreciate this comment. I don't post on social media but I do have it. I also have a small circle so maybe if I branch out I may have different results.

[lovelyhoneybones]

It makes me sad when I hear people say things like "You're pretty for a black girl" or "I don't date black girls". I begin to think we as people have come SO far but then I hear comments like this and I lose hope in humanity. I just have to remind myself that not all people are like this. Unfortunately that's something you're going to have to deal with. Also given that you're 15, so possibly in 9th or 10th grade it's even sadder because these boys are so young. I would say that males that are older are different, but sometimes I'm not too sure anymore.

[princesskayle]

I've never been told those comments by the kids at my school but others but I get what you are saying. It is sad, I just hope one day people won't feel the need to bash others to lift themselves or other people up.

[lovelyhoneybones]

I'm glad you've never personally experienced that then, hopefully you never will. I have faith by the time this next generation grows up, we won't be seeing as much bias and close mindedness when it comes to interracial dating and such.

[princesskayle]

I hope so

[Lovelinefan]

Well, you're aware of the main reason why you're not having the best luck with guys, and that's you're insecurities. So you're on the right track, at least you've identified the problem.
I doubt that race has as much to do with it as you think. It may play a role, but I think if you were more confident, approachable, and guys were attracted to your personality more then your race would be something that could easily be overlooked even if the guy doesn't think he's usually attracted to black girls. I'm a white dude and when I was in school, I don't think I was ever really attracted to black girls (but then again there weren't too many where I grew up). Now that I'm older, I totally find black chicks attractive (Some, not all. But that goes for white girls too)

Work on becoming more confident and comfortable being YOU. And don't mess around with your eyebrows too much, that can turn some guys off. (guys like me, at least)

[princesskayle]

Yeah, I think it's important to find the root of your issues and take responsibility rather than blaming others. I mentioned race it wasn't meant to be the focus of the article. It just played a part in the example because he seemed more confident talking about a liking a girl like him than someone like me. I don't think it the main reason but a sub-reason reason in a certain situation. I think for be it plays a bigger role because in the media and what not it's constantly having you believe that as a black girl you're ounwanted. Other races don't look at you. Black men don't even want you because they'll go places and will leave you like Kanye said. It happens a lot, it's like you're not good enough because you're not light skin or you're not mixed or don't look mixed. Of course, everyone is not going to be attracted to everyone of every race that's a given. I will definitely work on that, it's one of my many goals.

[princesskayle]

As far as my eyebrows I only filled them in and cleaned them up with concealer. Nothing that was permanent other than cleaning up in between nothing you can really see. I still have eyebrows and then look natural.

[RJGraveyTrain]

Honestly I've met few guys who didn't like a girl because she was black, but then again the topic didn't come up. I won't say that it doesn't happen, I'm sure it does, but I have many black (and extremely beautiful) friends who had no issue with men approaching them, so unless they tell you so, don't be quick to assume it's your race. Not for them, but for yourself.

All in all you seem very self aware and smart, and acknowledge that your issue could very well be the lack of self esteem. I can tell you 100% in high school that I was no "it" girl, tons of guys didn't pine after me, it wasn't until I got older, came into my own, worked on myself, etc, that I noticed I got a lot more attention. I think with time lady Kayle you will blossom and feel good about yourself, and for good reason.

[princesskayle]

Thank for this response. I have been told that people would have been interested but when they don't think black girls are attractive. I don't mind. I know everyone won't find everyone attractive but they often use that as an excuse to put you don't which I don't think is fair. Self-esteem is a big issue I face and I know that's something I have to overcome myself and I'm working on it. I surely hope I blossom.

[PurpleTeardrops2]

I understand your feelings completely, we live in a whitewashed society in America, but don't get caught up in the "hype". It's all a farce and not even true, because even white women don't live up to the "standard of beauty", there's a reason why their demographic suffers the most from eating disorders, plastic surgery, etc.
Men, regardless of race, ain't shit. I truly say that without any malice or bitterness. A black fuckboy is no different from a white fuckboy.
Don't let any peon make you feel less than when it comes to your beauty. Your blackness is the original, the OG, the prototype that every other person's features is based on.

The first human to walk on this planet was an African, and she was pitch black, look up the "Eve gene", it explains it perfectly.

You are a black woman, the original IT girl, not these shitty mattel replicas.

[0112358]

I think that inter racial dating... it can be even harder then it normally is to pick up on whether the other person is interested, and a little more intimidating to approach.

So if you're in an environment where you're around a lot of people of a race other than you're own, you'll probably have to be even a little MORE encouraging or taking the lead then most girls your age. Its not because guys don't like you, its because they're even less confident you might like them back.

[princesskayle]

I think it can be harder to normally pick up on people when you're not the same race as them but for me picking up anything is hard. I probably could try to be more encouraging. They might be less confident but they talk to other people so I just feel like it's me and not them.

[0112358]

It's you and them being shy!

I know that doesn't make it easier but hopefully it helps knowing it's not you. Or them. It just takes a little -more- guts.

[princesskayle]

Yeah I get what you're saying thanks

[Indian-African]

I find it funny how you're complaining about people not being attracted to you because of your race. You are lucky that you are black and not Indian or Asian who have it far worse than you.

Would you rather people think you're cool, from" tha hood" (not saying you are from the hood), and athletic or a nerd who eats curry, drives a taxi, and has a funny accent?

[SmartButBroke]

You constantly whine about women not liking you/Indians, but, like most Indians and other Asians, you only mean white women. So, you don't have it worse--you just eliminate all women who are not white, despite the fact that you said in one of your posts that you're open to all women. I saw how you lit into all the white women who responded to you, and I realized at that point that you were and are full of schitt. You can try and pull that schitt with me, and seeing you around here enough I am sure you will... but I don't spend my time on the internet arguing with people, so I'm done with this once I hit "submit."

There are black women who would like you, but you're too busy being angry about how you *think* white women don't like you. I love Indian men, but I suppose that makes no difference to you since I'm not white. Indian/Asian men pay even less attention to black women than white men do, but you all insist you have it "far worse" just because ONE race doesn't like you.

[Indian-African]

@SmartButBroke
Not once did I ever say I only want white women. I mentioned white women because they attack my race and say racist things about my race. I have never seen a black woman say racist things about Indian men.

And of course Im the big bad wolf and you're the "innocent" victim. And as a man I am not allowed to have preferences.

[princesskayle]

Both of those are stereotypes. Every black person isn't from the "hood". Not every Indian is a nerd or drives a taxi. Not every person follows a stereotype. I'm not complaining about anything. The race thing was only a small section most of the article was about my insecurities and lack of confidence. That's not what this about, it's not about race it's about me, I'm more than my race. The only one complaining is you. If you want to complain write your own post because this is not the place.

[princesskayle]

You're allowed to have a preference but don't put down others.

[Indian-African]

Yeah let me do that and then get banned for "attacking" white women.

[Indian-African]

Unlike white women I don't put down anyone.

[princesskayle]

Why are you so mad about white women?

[Indian-African]

Would you like it if your race was constantly laughed at? would you like it if people were constantly bashing your race and saying everyone of your race is ugly? Would you like it if you were constantly judged based on stereotypes and accused of X, Y, and Z because some people who happen to be the same race as you do X, Y and Z? I didn't do anything wrong to them so why do they treat Indians like the way they do? I don't talk about white women saying "hahahaha their tits are small and have a flat ass" like how they say about my race "hahaha their dicks are small and they smell bad".

[princesskayle]

All of that stuff has happen to me and black people alike. Stop acting like you're the only one with struggles and as if you have it worse them others

[Indian-African]

Im not claiming anything. You asked me a question so I answered. But I understand once again I am a bad person and have no right to speak about my problems because it offends you. My bad.

[princesskayle]

You have a right but you're acting like you only deal with things then get mad when others point that out.

[Indian-African]

You're making an unsubstantiated accusation.
Yes black people faced far worse racism in the past but not so much today and just because black people faced such horrific racism a long time ago does not mean others can't face racism.

Black people are well represented on TV and movies, black people are considered attractive, black people are seen as cool, people riot, loot and protest against racism against blacks but I don't see the same for Indians.

Remember back in the day when they made cartoons making fun of black people? Now those cartoons are banned but is there any campaign to ban the cartoon character Apu? Nope.

[princesskayle]

They aren't. Most of the time it's in a negative light. So yeah we may get shown but we're stealing and that's not a good light. People steal from very background we usually get the horrible roles.

[Hemlock]

@SmartButBroke Indians in general are obsessed with white people. Colonization and imperialism sucks.

[Indian-African]

@Hemlock
White people are obsessed with yoga and Indian women.

[Hemlock]

Keep telling yourself that, maybe one day you'll actually believe it.

[Indian-African]

@Hemlock
If my statement is not a fact then neither is yours.

[Hemlock]

Mine is fact though."The Indian fairness cream industry is worth around $450m. Fair & Lovely, marketed by the consumer goods behemoth Hindustan Unilever, has more than a 50 per cent share of the market. The BBC once reported that India, more skin lightening creams are sold than bottles of Coca Cola. GIA market research has predicted that the global skin lightening industry will reach $30bn by 2020."From the fact listed above, one obviously can conclude the majority of Indians/South Asian aren't happy with their skin tone and wish to be whiter, because they find that attractive, why? Taking a look back at India's sad history, one can conclude or add up, due to British colonial days, Indians grew fond of white skin, white skin like their master, since then it's been embedded in their brains. White equals good/beautiful, dark brown/black:Bad/ugly. It's kinda like they're still mentally slaves. To sum it up, the British has a forever major effect on India, both good and bad.

[Indian-African]

@Hemlock
So you met every Indian? It's funny how you generalize an entire race and use an article to try and back your claims.

In America a significant amount of white people do not agree with same sex marriage does that mean all white people are homophobic?

Also in many parts of Africa black people bleach their skin as a matter of fact it is so prevalent that it is considered an epidemic but does that mean all black people bleach their skin?

See how your logic fails.

Im not ashamed of my skin tone nor do I want to be white nor do I know any Indian who wants to look white.

[Indian-African]

“You can look at all those journals and you'll not see one woman of color,” said Raja Michelle, herself a white woman, who founded the studio. “We associate yoga with being skinny, white, and even upper class.”

"The magazine images may seem like stereotypes, but they’re grounded in reality: About one in every 15 Americans practices yoga, according to a 2012 Yoga Journal study, and more than four-fifths of them are white."
www.theatlantic.com/.../

"In the US, for example, the image of yoga is often associated with white, thin, able-bodied, middle class women. If you’re one of these women, yoga is being marketed to you all over the place, and might not have noticed anything wrong with the way it’s being advertised."

everydayfeminism.com/.../

[Hemlock]

I stand corrected. You can generalize an entire race, we do it all the time, just like how you said skin bleaching is so prevalent in Africa it's considered an epidemic...(with no backing) . The article backed my claim 100%. Maybe you're not ashamed of your skin tone, but clearly millions of Indians are. You can look all over the Internet and find thousands of articles with Indians with inferior complex, talking about their skin being too dark, about them being called kala or whatever. I can reference you some if you'd like. An Indian guy even told me he loves my skin color because it's clean, lol. Not all logic applies to everything, not everything is comparable, you should know if you ever took math, HISTORY, physics/chemistry course. Also why is your name"Indian-African"?

[Indian-African]

@Hemlock
I get it you hate Indians and want to paint us as these evil bad people who have bad attitudes and we're all the same all 1.2 Billion of us. And I get the double standard: It's not ok to generalise white people but it is acceptable to generalise Indian people.

You win. All Indian people are bad people and all white people are good and Innocent.

I call myself Indian African because I was born in Africa and my parents are Indian.

[Hemlock]

My boyfriend is Indian, particularly Punjabi 😂😂😂I love the Punjabi culture and their language. I actually want to visit with my boyfriend this summer. Maybe I went a little too overboard with this, I was just trying to help darker people feel better about their complexion. They're good and bad people of every race. I've met horrible white people and very sweet lighthearted Indian boys/girls. You're right it's not okay to generalize, I was just trying to prove a point.

[princesskayle]

I find it funny you call them out for generalizing when you were just doing that.

[TrollG0D]

Unless you're going to be sweet and submissive you won't have much success with the white guys you love so much I can tell you that right now...

Being brash and brazen will only be tolerated by black guys, which you probably avoid like the plague (which is ironic since you are black).

[princesskayle]

I don't know where you got the white thing from. This comment was very ignorant and not needed.

[Asp3n]

Dude I don't know what jean pool you crawled out of, but their are plenty of men that love brash and brazen. Look around you there are all types out hun don't listen to someone so myopic.

[pavlove]

a lot of modern girls aren't sweet nor submissive nor polite/proper and are also oblivious that most guys don't find women funny period and don't want to "go and forth trading playful jokes" and like to push their girl humor on disappointed guys. I would say your insecurities are vastly the biggest reason and everything else is like a raindrop in an ocean of your insecurity

[TheUsername27]

Yes modern girls have become even more cocky each year. I'd put it on feminism for the most part. honestly the generation live in now has the worse possible females around... ones that twerk and post half naked pictures on their snap-chat and insta... very few have self respect (they will just say they are 'insecure' so they go ahead and seek attention online to feed their ego).

[Heera]

@TheUsername27 there are just as many guys half naked as girls. I don't have much respect for all that swag and gym pics either. At the end of the day people taking half naked pics are attention seekers.
Anyways, why not letting people be? Not every girl has to be your type, just like not all the guys have to be my type, but I'm not judging them nor I bitch about them, not to mention I'm not generalizing the whole male population. Let's try to understand each other better instead of complaining about the other gender :)

[pavlove]

@Heera no one is complaining about you. we're just saying that it's not only this girl who's personality isn't sweet. a lot of girls are not sweet as, it seems, yourself. no one is saying we expect you to be our type or be anything other than yourself. just making observations

[Heera]

@pavlove I understand, I'm just trying to point out that most women and men aren't bad but generalizing the whole gender is. As I encounter a lot of bitterness from feminiazis and misogynists alike, I thought people should be reminded this from time to time. My previous comment was meant for @TheUsername27 who linked naked pictures and seeking attention to female gender, even tho this behaviour is common to both genders. But that is most likely just a phase caused rather by social media acceptance seeking than feminism. And every genaration has its flaws, doesn't mean we are the worst. Anyway, thank you for your kind reply!

[princesskayle]

I don't think you have any right to get mad for generalizing when you just generalized most girls. I will admit insecurities are a big problem but there are other variables that will affect solutions. Maybe girls around you aren't but that doesn't mean every girl isn't. I wrote this post not you this is about me not you okay, so that means this is my life, not yours. You may not find women funny but I know I'm funny. It's not being cocky I know how to make people laugh. It happens every day not all of my jokes are amazing but a decent amount is.

[princesskayle]

@TheUsername27 People need to stop blaming feminism. It's a movement, it's not the movement that makes people do things it's the people. I'm so tired of that being an excuse. It's so annoying. Just because you dress half naked and twerk doesn't mean anything other than the fact that you don't wear that much fabric and that they like to twerk. I'm so tired of the generalizations. They can have self-respect. Modesty does not equal self-respect.

[abundantlyrich]

what is this post about? that your doomed forever? I see a lot of people who love to explain why they are so unattractive and yet felt tormented by no guy or girl approaching them. Selling how unattractive you are doesn't attract others.

Do you have any good things about your personality that might appeal to others instead?

[princesskayle]

I do I was just expressing my current feelings at the moment. The post was about what I didn't feel attractive, not necessarily why others didn't think I was. To know that I would have to ask them

[JohnDoe3000]

"My personality also isn't sweet and submissive. I'm not the nicest all of the time. I'm more of the sarcastic time. I'm very humorous and I'm not the type of person who is usually serious. I'm not the most proper person when I'm not needed to be."

Sounds perfect to me. Don't just assume all guys want the same things in a girl. Though yes, you have to work on your insecurities.

[princesskayle]

I just realized I had a typo whoops lol. I am aware I need to work on my insecurities and I am in the progress of doing it. I shouldn't assume but at my school all the girls that seem to be talked to all act the same and dress the same. It's a bit inevitable for me somewhat because when that's all you see you start to believe it.

[Rachel_is_gay]

You don't need to be submissive or be the nicest person ever for them to like you. Just be yourself, act like yourself and just... Just be the person inside of your head lol I used to act so fake and be so insecure, but now I'm being more like myself and more people like me lol

[princesskayle]

I know I don't need it was just something that I was thinking about at the time. I try to be myself but more people won't like me or anyone. People like who they like, most around me are fake and they like being fake. Others like them regardless of everything being staged and not their true selves.

[KnightCross]

you are just overthinking it. be natural. most of people have forgot how to be "natural". you have filled up your head with garbage because of your thoughts. you need to hear yours INSTINCT.

I really need to write something about that in the future for the goodness of the boys and girls of this generation

[princesskayle]

I may be overthinking but I don't really know what else to do.

[KnightCross]

ok... an easy start to u... start praying... evil thoughts will slowly stop popping up in your mind

[princesskayle]

Okay I'll try

[archiz]

it s ok you ll get around.
I was like that when I was in school and then things got better.
what sets you apart is what gives you most value, just work on your confidence and being happy and open and people who like what you offer will get around with you.
like people have different preferences and likes so...

[LolaB28]

I can relate to everything on this take. I get rejected a lot simply because of looks, they just use some bullshit excuse though.

[princesskayle]

Yeah, it's sad. People act like it doesn't happen when it does.

[dogfish]

attractiveness is subjective. maybe you are not attractive to yourself and whole bunch of guys but you maybe attractive to at least one person. i'm sorry that you think that. i dont know you i dont know what you look like but all i can say is sorry that you think that.

[princesskayle]

It definitely is. I know that I don't always think I am but I'm working on being more confident. I may be attractive to someone if not that's okay. I don't need to worry about it I can focus on other things. Not being in a relationship doesn't stop you from doing anything. People may judge but whatever.

[ManaX]

Another insecure black girl on GAG 'sigh'. Please stop. In all my time here there's been too many of you giving 'black women' a bad impression. African American and black British, two completely different groups yet people class us as one ugh. Don't come here expecting people to feel sorry for you, rise above it and get on with your life.

[PurpleTeardrops2]

EXACTLY! These types of questions and the regular "Do white/Hispanic guys like me?" are just annoying and pathetic. I understand that a lot of black women suffer from low self esteem, especially verbal attacks from other black men, but we have to become strong and continue to push through the obstacles.

[xxmamichulaxx]

Finally someone said it !

[princesskayle]

@ManaX I don't expect people to feel sorry. It's so funny when people overlook the main idea. It's not about race which is the problem with sad people like you. Sigh another girl that is too worried about others rather than herself. You need to get on with your life and stop leaving comments that aren't needed. If you don't like the post leave. The only one looking for praise is you and that's really sad.

@PurpleTeardrops2 This wasn't a question. If you want to talk about that go elsewhere. I don't have low self-esteem because of racial issues that stem from other things. Yeah preach but preach elsewhere again this wasn't needed. This wasn't about race that was one paragraph. I love how people latch on to one thing to shove their agenda down your throat.

@xxmamichulaxx and no they didn't if you want to why don't you write your own rather than being a keyboard warrior which goes to all of you. You're the type that ignores the problem and blame others do that somewhere else.

[Kittyxxx]

Sweety you're fine!!! Its completely okay to not love every single part of yourself and high school boys are trash anyway. I'm sure you're gorgeous and beautiful and kind and when the right guy comes he'll see all your beauty