Depressed that I am not good enough for my crush.

Anonymous
I feel that I am not good enough for this guy I have a crush on. He is probably one of the strongest crushes I have ever had. Although, my self-esteem took a drop & I have been getting in a depressed mood, because I don't think he'll ever like me. We are total opposites and hang out with different people. He does look at me sometimes, but I don't think it means anything. I would assume that since he is athletic & hangs out with the popular athletes of our grade, he would want a girl with an athletic type (into sports, fit body) but I am not. I don't know crap about sports and I am sort of big (although I carry it well). I am trying to get skinny, not skinny like we see in the media nowadays but fit. Yes I am trying to lose weight in every means possible so I don't need input on that subject. I am certainly NOT what you would consider hot, or exceptionally pretty even, although I have always felt this way. Recently I began cutting myself on my arm and hips to help let out some of the pain. I don't think it's a problem. He claims that he thinks personality is more important that looks, but with teenage boys it is more likely that they would take a hot girl than an average one. I guess I am quick to judge but we know how that goes. Don't say "he's a jerk if all he wants is looks", be that as it may it's still hard not too like him. He is cute and I just love the way he acts (sort of obnoxious but I am guilty for liking those kind of guys) I don't feel worth anything anymore, I don't know if my crush was the trigger to that or if it was just a spontaneous revelation. It would seem he would be degrading himself if he got with me. I want to get over him considering I don't have a chance with him! It sickens me! He hangs out with girls but they're only his friends (not dates) but it just drives me insane! And I admit jealousy I have. They are so pretty! But so fake in the way they act! I just want to get over all of this! This whole question might sound stupid but it's sincerely how I am feeling/acting!
Updates
+1 y
sorry it's not much of a question, I just need insight on how to over him.
Depressed that I am not good enough for my crush.
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