If this girl is interested in me, then why does she not seem to make any effort to get to know me?

[Anonymous]

So I asked this girl out who I am interested in, we don't know hardly anything about each other, she enthusiastically says yes, we decided to make it a double date with her friend and a friend I have. So we go out to dinner and then watch a movie together at my house after. She says she enjoyed herself.

OK. Making conversation with this girl was a CHORE, seriously. I really want to get to know her, so naturally I ask her questions. When I would ask a question, she would answer it simply, and that would be all, she wouldn't elaborate at all, or ask me any questions back. Plus I didn't ask to many questions after this because I didn't want her to feel like she was being interrogated or something.

this confuses me because normally If I'm with a girl who is interested in me she will ask me questions to try to get to know me. So is this girl not interested in me?

I have a girl friend that sits next to me in the class I met this girl in and she adamantly INSISTS that this girl likes me, saying she has seen her checking me out many times and looking at me and whispering excitedly to her friend "here he comes" when I walk in, ECT.

She has expressed interest in going out again but how am I going to get to know her if she will hardly talk to me? Is she uncomfortable? What can I do to get her to open up? Was it harder for her to open up because it was a double date and she was with her friend? (although she did impress me by not talking to her friend the whole time and totally ignoring me)

any and all help is much appreciated, thank you very much

first time user here :)

Updates

+1 y

shayshay94 wins! yeah should have spent my money on a different girl that night, she most definitely used me for a free meal or w/e, found out a week later she was interested in some other guy and began ignoring me, her Facebook status changed from

Updates

+1 y

single to in a relationship and then a day later she deleted her status completely w/e that means? w/e, her loss. Thank you shayshay94 for your honest and direct answer, I wish more girls were like you.

[Anonymous]

I did EXACTLY THAT.

With this guy that I was totally in love with still am ^ ^

lol I do not know if this is good or bad, but It tok me about two years to talk to him... It is still difficult I mean I still get nervous - That is partly why I do not push anything - exactly like you are talking that is how he was talking to his friend &me at some point... So I do not want to have to worry about it.

my main pint is that it is ENTIRELY possible that a girl is a bit tongue tied or seemingly aloof or detached & really like you *

Often the fact that they like you, is the REASON that they are silent..

I know if yo are used to something else it is hard to believe but it is true.

I have never been silent with any one - ask my friends lol

I -TALK TALK TALK haha

With the guy, nothing I mean I can count all the convo we have had & recite them & it would not take long & we have been talking for 2 years & he has spent quite a bit of time with me.

:-)

[shayshay94]

from a girls view it either sounds like she in not interested in you when she doesn't ask question backs and also it sounds like she just want's to be friends. Becuase yes she may have had a fun time but I don't think she want's to move on anymore than that. On the other hand her and her friend might be playing a joke on you becuase if she seriously did liked you she would seriously ask you questions back but then at school she would be excited to see it does not match up. If you really want to find out if she likes you is you need to ignore her until she finally asked you if she did something wrong to p*ss you off or something like that and then tell her you like her and want to get to know her and if she says she likes you to then take her out and spoil her but if she says she is not ready or just wants to be friends then it is obvious that she is not interested in you

[Asker]

You win! ;) thank you :) see the update if you want to know what happened lol.

[toulouse]

If she is shy she will not anything about what she did.

Most people do not ask people they do ont now what they did wrong- not everyone feels that self consious.

If you ignore her & she ikes you she won't talk, she will think that you do not like her- if she does she may ignore in return.

people do not always ak questions when they like someine- they often do not.Because they like soeone- same with acting excited-not everyone does that.

But ok ignore her & see what happens, You may lose trust.

[Asker]

I never said I was going to ignore her, I have tried texting her, she no longer replies.

[Elcristoph]

Women who arn't interested don't answer texts... its universal.. a flat mate of mine stopped texting this guy and asked her why she didn't just text him saying she didn't want to see him. (in a repectful way) she said, "becouse I'm alittle creeped out and I'm a coward"... and woman think men are the ones who mess people around.. funny world ain't it :)

[marax013]

if she really likes you then she might have been nervous. some of us girls worry soooo much about what a guy thinks about us, its crazy. but we can't help it.

maybe she just didn't want to sound stupid.

i would ask her out again, not a double date though. make her feel really comfortable and let her know that she can be herself. that will help, trust me!

once she's more relaxed, she'll open up.

good luck!

[Boneless-skeletal]

She is probably shy, and because she likes you that makes her even more shy. This might be a new experience for her, so she does not know how to behave. Don't rush things! Try asking open ended questions (e.g. a question where a yes/no answer is not enough).

Do fun things where conversation is build in, e.g. play putt-putt or go shopping rather than watching a movie where you don't speak, or going out on a dinner where the "pressure" of having to say something might be too big. This would help distract the attention from the shyness and help her to open up.

Hope this helps! Post a reply on what happened.

[Robertinho]

Thats so messed up, I can't believe how some girls hide their true evilness inside, and their beauty in the outside. Reminds me of my situation, girl that I've dated for about a year and 9 months out of nowhere throws me away like a dog, for a new boy toy. All that time spent for nothing...damn what a life. Your better then that man, don't brake yourself, make yorself, you seem like a great guy, good luck there. And remember when it comes to girls, things are not always what the appear to be, be very careful with all of them man.

[Superslimshady1]

It looks like she does like you if she expressed that she wanted to go out again bit I think she didn't as you question because she is shy and it was a double date. Check my question and please awnser thnx

[Akeela]

Some girls are really to shy to go up to a guy and start talking or getting to know them well, I'm like that. I stand safe off in the distance...not a good idea, but some girls do it anywayz.

[fastpitchgrl13]

She's probably extremely nervous around you. And is crazy about you.