I met a guy in one of my college classes that I was interested in. He’s not the most attractive, but I was intrigued by his sense of humor and confidence/intelligence. He started paying attention to me and sitting next to me occasionally when there was a seat available.
Here’s what I noticed: Joking/teasing (boyish, silly things like writing nonsense on my class notes), Lots of staring (mostly sneaky, looking away quickly, a few times staring straight into my eyes, or even the “deer in headlights” look), “accidentally” brushing his arm against mine and fidgeting
I thought that he was using the teasing as a safe way of interacting with me - so one time after a full class period of him sneaking glances at me I walked up to him, smiled, and introduced myself. He looked absolutely shocked and nervous that I was talking to him and didn’t smile at all. I felt like he was being really gruff and rude. He informed me that he already knew my name because he was very observant (which was my turn to be surprised because I didn’t know anyone in that class and I only mentioned my name once to a girl at the beginning of the semester). After this awkward interaction, he sat next to me every time we had class but seemed way too anxious to talk to me. The most that would really happen at that point is a smile, “hey” or “bye”. I would always greet him back and give a really warm smile. He was putting off such a weird vibe that I actually felt nervous myself. He would often turn towards me like he wanted to say something. Sometimes it would seem like he was even afraid to look at me. Later I asked him why he didn’t want to joke around with me any more and he looked at the floor and mumbled something about joking when he was bored. There really wasn’t a lot of opportunities for talking though because this was an important class. I tried joking and talking a little with him. He seemed really happy when I would do this but it still felt like he was nervous with me.
Other information: After class one time I saw him hug another girl (in an amorous way and I assumed that she was his girlfriend) He was talking with his (male) friend one time right next to me loudly enough like he wanted me to hear the conversation. Basically the friend was telling him to call some girl and he replied with “I can’t trust her anymore and I just don’t care anymore either. She’s in high school anyways and a blond”. It felt like they were making up a story. This same friend would also stare at me occasionally. He would talk completely normally with another girl in our class. I think he wanted to see if I would get jealous because he would quickly turn to look at me when he was talking to her as soon as I got up to leave.
Guys, can you tell me what he is thinking? I would like to ask him directly what was going on between us in a non-threatening way (like an email) but I don’t know how to phrase it without making him feel embarrassed, and he might not feel comfortable telling me the truth
Here’s what I noticed: Joking/teasing (boyish, silly things like writing nonsense on my class notes), Lots of staring (mostly sneaky, looking away quickly, a few times staring straight into my eyes, or even the “deer in headlights” look), “accidentally” brushing his arm against mine and fidgeting
I thought that he was using the teasing as a safe way of interacting with me - so one time after a full class period of him sneaking glances at me I walked up to him, smiled, and introduced myself. He looked absolutely shocked and nervous that I was talking to him and didn’t smile at all. I felt like he was being really gruff and rude. He informed me that he already knew my name because he was very observant (which was my turn to be surprised because I didn’t know anyone in that class and I only mentioned my name once to a girl at the beginning of the semester). After this awkward interaction, he sat next to me every time we had class but seemed way too anxious to talk to me. The most that would really happen at that point is a smile, “hey” or “bye”. I would always greet him back and give a really warm smile. He was putting off such a weird vibe that I actually felt nervous myself. He would often turn towards me like he wanted to say something. Sometimes it would seem like he was even afraid to look at me. Later I asked him why he didn’t want to joke around with me any more and he looked at the floor and mumbled something about joking when he was bored. There really wasn’t a lot of opportunities for talking though because this was an important class. I tried joking and talking a little with him. He seemed really happy when I would do this but it still felt like he was nervous with me.
Other information: After class one time I saw him hug another girl (in an amorous way and I assumed that she was his girlfriend) He was talking with his (male) friend one time right next to me loudly enough like he wanted me to hear the conversation. Basically the friend was telling him to call some girl and he replied with “I can’t trust her anymore and I just don’t care anymore either. She’s in high school anyways and a blond”. It felt like they were making up a story. This same friend would also stare at me occasionally. He would talk completely normally with another girl in our class. I think he wanted to see if I would get jealous because he would quickly turn to look at me when he was talking to her as soon as I got up to leave.
Guys, can you tell me what he is thinking? I would like to ask him directly what was going on between us in a non-threatening way (like an email) but I don’t know how to phrase it without making him feel embarrassed, and he might not feel comfortable telling me the truth
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