If a girl says no to a date?

If a girl says no at one point, should you never ask her out again? Should a man leave her alone forever and never ask again. Or if still interested, after a period of time, should one ask again?


Most Helpful Guy

  • It depends really. But if a girl says no then you have done somethign wrong with your game.

    It could be a shit test. She wants to know if you are really interested in her. In which case, you have to have the eye to know it.

    I've posted a similar answer before because it is something that has worked for me and have been confirmed to work many times.

    Do not ask a girl out until you've had some really good indicator of interest from her.

    In your particular situation, she has said no, she knows you are interested in her already so it puts you at a disadvantage.

    Don't ask her out again soon, let some time pass. During that time you have to show her a demonstration of higher value from a longer time perspective. This basically means you let her see you flirt with other girls, let her see that even without her you are fine.

    When an opportunity crops up that you can chat her up again, don't just blurt it out, entertain her, prepare some material that she might be interested in, like movies or whatever she likes to talk about, prepare some games like "The Cube Test" google it. The Cube test is a personality test to get to know someone in a unique manner. Girls like guys who can entertain them.

    Then after that make a few moves that stablishes if she is confident with you and you can touch her, play a palm reading game and arouse her touch senses, play with her hair by putting your arms around her, she'll get confused if you are really just wanting to touch her hair or you are going to pull her close and kiss her. I think you get the drift.

    Then you can ask her out when you know for sure she will say yes anyways.

    • Well said and remember not to ask girls out, just flirt, seduce her and make her want to tell you she wants to start a relationship. Yo job is not to talk talk talk, yo job is to seduce her and letting her do the confessions of her love for yah. It works, just ggogle how to tell if a girl likes you and learn to read the signs. Then when you know she's yours 4 the takin, then go 4 the kiss and if she responds ask her out after her showing interest and not before

What Girls Said 5

  • I would agree that you should ask again if you feel up for it. Realizing that it's entirely possible, maybe even probable, that she will say no yet again. If she asks you not to ask her again or otherwise makes it very clear that she's NEVER going to change her mind, then I would say that's when you should for sure back off.

    How she's going to take it is anybody's guess. I have had guys who never relented asking me out. One guy in particular asked me out pretty much daily for 4-5 months. I never changed my mind and after awhile it got annoying and a little weird. Especially since I did tell him that I was NEVER going to change my mind. And I never did.

    There was another guy though that used to ask me out on a very regular basis and I ended up liking him a LOT. I just never really took him seriously. So eventually I did say yes. After that there was a lot of drama that led to an inherent inability for us to work out so we ended up just becoming best friends. But I NEVER got tired of him asking me, lol.

    I think tazzy has the best advice so far. Feel it out. Look for some sort of signs that she may have changed her mind. And be ready for the chance that she hasn't.

  • The only time you should is if she had a boyfriend at the time she turned you down.

  • Ask again unless when she turned you down she was extremely adamant. Some times it is not the right time or situation for a relationship.

  • if the girl doesn't like you and she's made it clear I suggest moving on because your just going to get hurt.

    • The problem is what if she does like him in a way? I've had girls tell me no and apparently were just unsure. If he plays it right, he doesn't have to get hurt. A guy can get hurt only if he lets himself fall heads over heels for 1 girl before they are in a relationship.

  • Wait for awhile then try again


What Guys Said 8

  • If YOU'RE interested then make sure to ask her again! I don't know what you asked her to do -go together, go to a movie or what? Maybe wait a week and then ask her to do something different. It's ok to keep asking as long as you don't get a definite rebuke or a nasty NO or she tells you to pleas don't ask her anymore! Then you have to take it that she has no interest in your, but remember other girls might so don't let that be a big put down as if no girls will ever wanna go with you. It could have been poor timing on your part, or maybe she'll have second thoughts someday and give you a chance but you won't know unless you ask her. Too many guys don't get the girls they really like because they're afraid to ask, or they're afraid to ask more than once, or they don't think they have a chance.

  • It depends on her response.

    - If she says ''No'', then forget about her.

    - If she says ''I can't, I already have plans'', then hint at another time to see if she is interested. She says ''I can't this Friday'' then you say ''No problem, we'll make another plan soon''. See how she responds to this. If she says something like ''Sure, no problem'' or ''Definitely, let me know when'' then you know you can ask again.

    - If she says ''I can't, I already have plans'' and follows it up with ''But I really would like to go for coffee, maybe another time?'' then definitely ask again.

    Don't ask again too soon though. If you ask her out for coffee this Saturday and she says she can't make it but hints at being up for it again another time, do not harass her on Saturday or Sunday asking again. Leave it for a few days. Maybe ask again the following Tuesday or Wednesday. Not too late in the week as friends usually start making plans by the Thursday/Friday for the weekend and as the new guy you will always lose out to friends, so Tuesday/Wednesday is the perfect time to arrange for a coffee date for the coming weekend.

    If she rejects you again, no matter how valid the reason may be, do not ask again. Don't be funny though if she turns you down a second time. If she says she can't make a second date just say ''Haha, you are a very busy girl. Well, let me know when you'd like to meet up''. Ball is now in her court. Do not contact her again. She knows you are interested in seeing her again - you've tried twice - and she also has your number and an open offer (you told her to let you know when she is free), she can now contact you. If you don't hear from her, move on.

  • I think it depends on how she said no. If she says "I would love to but I already have plans" or "Maybe some other time" then you should definitely ask her again because you probably just caught her at a bad time. Now if she just says no and doesn't give a reason then I would assume she's not interested unless she makes it obvious that she is. Basically if she has already said no to you then you shouldn't ask again unless you are sure that she is interested. Doing so will just annoy her if she isn't interested and could even be considered harassment, which could mean dealing with litigation and even jail time if she decides to press charges (although unlikely asking a second time). You can still talk to her and see if she gives off signs that she would be interested in going out, but unless she does I would move on and not ask her out again.

  • I guess it depends on why she said no, and how she said no. If you want to ask her out again, then you should. I've asked a girl out several times and she has only said yes three times, but in my case its kinda hard to have a relationship because we're both so busy. Maybe the girl you like is comparable to my situation. If you asked her out and she said heck no, don't bother asking her again. If she said no and gave a reason, she might just be really busy, so you should get to know her a little and ask her again later. If you asked her out by texting her, you should have expected a no from her. If you asked her and she said no, but suggested maybe you two could go out or hang out later, then she wants to go out, just not right now.That means she's busy, but she does want to spend time with you. I'm assuming she didn't say yes or heck yes, like what I've got a couple times, but don't sweat it.

  • ask her out for a catch up date

    you gain both ways:

    if yes - you go on date (pretend as friend though you want more - be aware play cool and ask politely for a follow on date at end, always be couteous/polite - be the gentleman

    if she says no - you rock for asking her out - but you have to put it away then and move on

    once I asked a girl out I really liked, as usual response NO!

    9 months later she wanted desperately to go out with me. I was not interested.

    that's life.

    women are strange creatures ;-) we hope!

  • i'm in a situation where I met a girl she was constantly sitting behind me afew rows and in the end I introduced myself to her. she was friendly and gave me her name and told me what she did etc. two weeks later I asked her out for a coffee as she was still sitting behind me. she said no as she was going away for a week. I said well maybe when you come back then. she smiled but did not say anything. I sort of felt she was not interested. when she came back she sat well away from me infont. twice I've seen her look at me and then turn her head suddenly. I don't know if I should ask her out again. please someone give me some advice...

  • Well, I invited a girl to have some lunch, and she turned down the offer. I did sound nervous, even though 1) she did show some signs of interest, 2) she did invite me to some kind of dinner with some mutual friends. But is it possible to ask her again? Or I just blew it and don't even think of asking her again (unless she shows another sign of interest)