Well it's part of a self confidence thing. Girls are extremely competitive .. with each other. So when you are dating some guy and you are in a relationship with them, the rule is, your mine an no one else can have you and you should only have eyes for me. I know some chicks that turn into little green eyed monsters when it comes to getting into a relationship because all of a sudden they feel like they have ownership over their guy or something.
So when a guy checks out another chick, the girl gets pissed firstly because he should only have eyes for her. And secondly she will get doubly pissed if this girl is better looking that her, cause she is competitive and already made that comparison. And thirdly she might be pissed because she has some rule that if you really liked her or love her or whatever that you should automatically not be attracted to other chicks.
All chicks prob have some level of this, but you will find that the more attractive ones have an even bigger prob with this, because they base a lot of their self worth by comparing to other people.
Hopefully that clarified it for you .. or maybe it made you more confused. Sorry can't help it. I am after all ... a chick =)
Close your eyes. Imagine you are at the mall with your girl and some Brad Pitt looking guy walked in and she was like "Hot damn what a hottie--Oooo I wish you had an ass like that."
How would you feel? Okay--I just answered your question.
Men and women look--my husband and I both look at women and men. I like looking at girls too--they are beautiful--but we do so respectfully. If you are constantly ogling others in a way that seems to say you are still on the hunt for a girl friend--it is highly disrespectful to who you are with. I wouldn't do that to my guy, so he should do the same for me.
Hmmm. me and my man check out women all the time. We rate some too. I know that is rude but. it's all fun.
I admire the beauty of women, so I don't know why a lot of girls get pissed. But based on the answers posted on here so far. It does make a lot of sense. A lot of girls are competitive. And a lot of girls want to think that they are the hottest woman in their man's eyes. But in reality. we all know that isn't true.
Anyways, I know I didn't really answer your question, but I would like to know how guys feel when their girl checks out other guys?
My boyfriend has never admitted it, but I can tell he gets pissed when I talk too long to one of his attractive friends, or when I do double take on other men. I don't do it on purpose. but then, I do it to women too, so I don't get it. But. how do guys feel?
I don't think it's that we get pissed so much as we get upset. It's disrespectful and it hurts. We feel inadequate and it has an impact on our self-esteem. While it's not the guys' problem that we're insecure, if they want a happy relationship, I suggest being respectful and not breaking your neck to check out other girls in front of your girl.
Cause you chose her, and why would you need to check out another girl? Girls are over dramatic. I do say that. But, we also have insecurities. We want to be your favorite, the one you think is the most beautiful and not have you staring at another girl while you're with us. :) It's understandable right? I'm sure you wouldn't want your woman checking out other guys right in front of you.
I believe women feel that if you are checking out another female then you believe she's hotter and then they begin to feel like well if he's looking at another girl who's to say he won't choose another girl. Insecurity is a big factor in many womens genetics. I know so many girls with this problem.
ok so would you be ok if you were with your girlfriend and she was checking out other guys. if ur talking about a friend then she prob likes you but its not her business. if she is ur girlfriend then you really shouldnt do that or just break up tih her and go after that other girl cause in my opinion youd be wasting that poor girls time if ur looking at other girls.
just let her be with some other guy that would appreciate her a little more or at least hav the decency to not check other girls out where she can see.
because to us its like secretly saying we are not as hot as them or not as attractive. If girls checked out other guys while our boyfriends were or were not with us and they saw or found out... it would hurt your pride and you would be pissed. Its the same for us to us its like your saying they're better than you or I wish you looked like that.
SOO many people take such a demeaning standpoint towards women!
The person commenting didn't say the girl was a girlfriend. Everybody keeps assuming this. also, maybe it's NOT a girls self-esteem thing. but just that a guy is preoccupied and has his attention on somebody ELSE irritates her and makes holding a conversation harder when the guy is distracted! both people don't know the girl he is checking out except by looks ALONE, so It's hard to compete with an IMAGE. and that's all it is since both people don't know the person the guy is staring at. a fantasy. Maybe not everybody likes to compete with something they don't know. if this even is a competition. Know your enemy?
Well, you could say jealousy. But on a deeper level, it excludes the girl you are with. If you turned it into a game and said "who do you think is better looking, that girl or that girl?" And did the same with two guys, I think 50% of girls would be game. But when you are checking somebody else out it makes them wonder if that girl is better looking.and I know personally my need for honesty outrates my need for approval. by like one percent. I need 51 percent honesty 49 percept approval. So while I'd be relieved you told me the truth (yeah, she's slightly hotter, for example, if that was the truth in your eyes) I would never forget you said that, and have a hard time forgetting it. A catch 22. If you just joked your way out of the answer, though, that would be good. It also depends how well this "girl" and you know each other. Are you dating? Are you married? Are you just FRIENDS? Are you friends but the girl has a crush on you? ETC. An overly simplistic question.
Your with a girl, yet your there looking at other girls. She'll feel like you don't like her and are only with her till you find someone you like better.
Well, I feel this way with real girls. If my guy tells me he likes so or so celeb wise I don't care, not as if he'd have a chance with her. But when the girl he's talking about is standing a few feet away from me, it's very real, upsetting and if a girls been cheated on in the past you lose her trust as the thought you want to be with them will enter her mind.
Well, if the girls have feelings for you they will be because they think you don't care about them and if you're in a serious relationship with them, it shows that you aren't serious at all with her in the relationship. If it is just telling her that ohhh that girl is pretty, don't you think? She won't get mad. But, if you constantly talking about the girl, obviously they will feel less attractive and think you're a pervert! haha
I just feel really uncomfortable and why does he want to check out another girl when he chose me?!? It kinda a slap in the face makes me wonder about a guy's self control. I just wonder what he's thinking too. I mean I see that fine boy too but my neck is not snapping trying to look at him because I have my baby.
snaiilz said it perfectly. It's genuine female insecurity.and overthinking. We automatically think we're inadequate compared to other girls when you check them out, and get a little upset. It's sort of like a sport between two girls. Whichever one gets the most attention from the guy is the winner (aka the prettiest).
It sounds ridiculous, but that's pretty much it. Just try not to check out other girls when you're out with someone, and if you're caught looking, come up with something like, "I was just thinking how much prettier your hair is than hers." idk.maybe you could come up with something better lol
I am personally not one of those girls because I know guys are attractive and so are girls. It's set in the mind to see that. There is checking out and there is seeing someone is pretty. Checking out is checking out their entire body, like you want it.
If you do that in front of your girl, then it is like you are more interested in her than you are your girlfriend. She finds it offensive not to mention it shatters her confidence.
If your gonna stare at someone like the whole head turning that's very disrespectful you have to see it our way a lot of girls are scared there boyfriend will leave them cause there not skinny enough or pretty enough or any othe insecurity they have and when a guy looks at another girl it makes it 10 times worse.
Because most girls forget that a guy is hardwired that way and think a guy is checking out another girl because she is BETTER than the girl your with. When girls like a guy, no other guy can compare in any way, therefore when they're with said guy they focus their attention on him 100%.
Girls also get mad because guys are so obvious about it, so it triggers feelings of being just "an object" or they see you as being tacky.
If I check out other guys [on my own time] I'm honestly comparing them to my boyfriend, and realized exactly how much better my baby is :] So I'm confident enough to trust that he's doing the same.although sometimes I could read it as he is telling me the have something I don't. Once apon a time they were that girl that you used to check out.and to think you'd do that to another girl.they feel like old news. So my reccomendation.don't chance it if she's gonna get testy.
Well me personally.I get mad cause it hurts me to see him checking another girl out. So the best way for me to express it is to get mad. Plus we only pay attention to our guy so we expect the same respect. If we don't get it it pisses us off cause of how hard we try to respect them and how flippintly they check someone else out.
well firstly guys should only either do it when out with the guys or if with your SO then perhaps a bit of discretion! Put shoe on the other foot, if your girl looks at other blokes when out with you, how does it make you feel? Be honest - unworthy? not as good looking? worried about her straying? - same goes.
long story short.::: basically because if its the guy you like, it makes the girl feel pretty stupid. I feel weird for saying that but its true. Girls compare themselves to the other girl and we get jealous. Then we feel ugly and even more insecure with ourselves and it brings out self-esteem down
when guys check out other girls, we automatically compare ourselves to them. cause in that moment, its like we're competing. its like a, "OMGZ she's prettier than me, wtfomgshit" sort of thing.
haha it sounds really dumb when I type this, but I feel like complete shit when guys I like check out other girls. makes me feel inadequate, ugly even. I know I shouldnt feel bad though, I check people out all the time, we all do. its just something people do, and there's no reason to make assumptions out of it.
pretty much, it sends the wrong message to the girl you're with. try to refrain from staring ast other girls when you're with a sopecific girl. you have plenty of time otherwise to do so. :P
Honestly it really depends on the girl and what your relationship it like... your girl may never look at other guys not because she choses not to look but because she no other guy can grab her attention like you can... then she sees you checking out other girls and wonders why you don't only have eyes for her because her eyes are only for you..
try to be descret about it...
this may sound bad, but it will make your girl feel so much better... if she catches you looking at some, say, "Did you see that nose, it washuge"...ectr... so that she can feel good and that you were not lokking at her like "damn tgat girl is hot"(even if you were)
get it out in the open that you both are still attracted to the oppiste sex(because everyone is, relationship or not) talk about what movie stars you guy find attractive... so that she becomes more comfortable with the idea... then explain to her how you fell about her.. tell her what you think is beautiful about her.ex"you have beautiful eyes and a verry sexy body" this will make her fell that you still have the hots for her... try to give her a complement on how she looks everyday that you see her. make sure that she knows that she could not be replaced by any girl in the world even if it was a supermodle because only she could catch you eye the way the she does... then her getting mad about you checking out other girls will eventually go away..
I reallly hopeo that you try this and that everything works out! <3
Many women are insecure, we compete in a society that is surrounded by beautiful women that don't look like everyday women, we also get cheated on a lot. some women are more jealous (insecure) than others, but its the way it is done that can be completely damaging, lots of guys look at these women like a dog that is panting, yet you guys don't look at your girlfriend that way, something to think about.
Even the most beautiful girls become a little sensitive when a guy they like or are dating gets caught eyeing another girl. Try to keep in mind that while you can't really control looking at a girl, what you do may hurt her feelings. ESPECIALLY if you make a comment at how hot the other girl is (a BIG no no). Briefly look at the girl, but then remember you're in the presence of another wonderful girl.
example: You have a nice truck that you work hard to maintain; now along comes this AMAZING new truck with all the accessories- lift, custom wheels and paint, black-out tint, expensive stereo system, and even some bikes on the back. the girl stops what she's doing with you and stares at this truck until it's out of sight. Then makes a quick comment on how she wishes she knew a guy who had a truck like that.
Generally speaking, it's true. Girls do get pissed when guys *they like* check out other girls. The reason being is because girls want to feel like, I don't know, 'they're the only ones in their man's life and he doesn't need to be looking at other girls'.
A huge part of the reason why girls get so upset is due to jealousy and insecurity; and this results from girls not feeling 100% comfortable with their relationship, or not being able to trust their man 100%, whatever. It's a lack of something.
Personally, I don't see what the commotion is about. Like, sure I don't love hearing my boyfriend say that he thinks some celebrity is hot or whatever, but, like, it's true, I'm not going to lie, and I know he'll just talk about it anyway when I'm not around, and plus, I know he'd choose love over lust. Girls who DON'T UNDERSTAND that need to either a) cut their man some slack, or b) date a guy who isn't a man whore. There aren't really any other options.
Its because it makes the girl feel like they aren't as attractive as the other one in your eyes. It lessens the girls view on herself. I always hated when guys did that around me because it just makes you think "what about me". You know what I mean? Just like if the girl went and checked out another guy when they were with you. I hope I helped.
Its based on a false assumtion. The whole what does she have that I don't mentality. It would be like painting a good painting like the Mona Lisa or something and being p*ssed people also glanced at a picasso while there at the Louvre. You can have the best painting but it doesn't mean its the only one worth looking at. Besides looking is not always sexual ok sometimes it is but sometimes its more like people watching and sometimes a girl just makes you smile. But its not really a threat because that's not a relationship. Most guys aren't gonna drop their prize for an awkward chat with that pretty girl that will lead nowhere. If a guy leaves a girl he's either unhappy or your both unhappy or he has a real character flaw. Its not because he saw a pretty young women out of the corner of his eye at the mall selling perfume and decides to throw it all away. YOu get what I am saying. In all fairness I can get a little uncomfortable about a girlfriend when she seems to be too friendly with a guy or says this and that person is hot almost as teasing testing me. I should get over being uncomfortable. Because ironically the less you fret about it the less its problem. For both men and women being non jealous sends a sub conscious message I am a high value mate and ur lucky lol. But it is human nature to not want to lose what we don't wanna lose so jealousy can be kinda cute sometimes too
Hey we are men we like pretty things, so when a hot little blonde walks in the room come on what do you expect us not to look. See now here's what I don't get ok say we take a peek at a hot girl who walks in the room women get all pissy and mad and blah blah blah.
But when we are sitting down talking to our woman and some dude walks in and what does she say oh man that is guy is hot. Normally the guy will get mad that you said that, but I wouldn't I would look at him and say ummm yeah I guess he's attractive but you know what he's got nothing on me. Us men have to sit through lame ass chick flicks with our gfs drooling over the guy in the movie. How is that right? So if we say something like damn that girl is hot on tv oh man its WWIII but not when you think a guys hot on tv, you get to say that all you want wtf that doesn't make any sense. Yet you get mad when we look at another girl we don't say anything about her we just look at her and you get all kinds of mad what's up with that?
Probably for the same reason I'd be a bit annoyed if a girl I was in a relationship with was constantly checking out other guys...jealousy and a bit of suspicion of cheating. Nothing wrong with checking someone out, but if probably makes them feel that they aren't enough for you and makes them feel inferior.
It makes them feel as if they have dropped a few levels in your eyes. When you are with your woman, you are supposed to be concentrating on her. She wants to feel security in knowing that no other woman can easily grab your attention. This is what my sisters told me. There is even a song by Nicole Wray called "Eyes Better Not Wander" on this subject. She explains exactly how she feels about it.
it's bad because girls think you're sorta "cheating" on them even though you probably or might not be. its natural for guys to look at beautiful or hot girls, but that doesn't mean the girl they are dating isn't good enough.
but even with that said, girls still feel a bit jealous and very insecure.
it's sad how insecure girls are nowadays. It is the same as admiring a piece of art hanging in a museum. It's not like guys look at these girls and contemplate leaving their woman.and don't give me that crap about how women never look at guys. Its a lie. You just think that when your man looks he is planning on cheating. Frankly it doesn't bother me when my girlfriend checks out a guy.because I know that she's just admiring the view but at the end of the day I'm the one she loves.
cuz its makes them think you don't care about them or want something better, its supposted to be about the girl your with. I've been caught before (by my ex) she didn't talk to me about it or anything I used a good playoff answer. we were driving back to her apartment and I saw a cute girl walking and I turned my torso to crack my back and she said how come you looked back @ her and I said I was just cracking my back
they dont, as long as they know for a fact that theyre the most important one in your life. just don't treat any girl better than her and it shouldnt be too much of an issue as long as you're not drooling over every girl you see
Because your behavior is making them feel jealous or insecure about their relationship with you.
O come the heck on, that's about as obvious as a nuclear fireworks show during a "time of peace", to a female that is about as bad as if not as bad as them walking up to and saying, yea you should work out to get rid of your man boobs, tone your stomache so I don't have to look at your disgusting flap anymore, umm take some male enhancment pills because your not big enough down there and ya know what, change your hair color I don't like it anymore. seriously not just females but males too want to feel special and loved and accepted and all of that good stuff, so if/when you're doing something to make them feel like they aren't special but other girls around them are, and doing it right in their face you are insulting and disrespecting them, hope this answers your question. so yea pretty much what all the girls are saying, you wouldn't like her looking for a new boyfriend while she's still with you, would you?
I think that sometimes guys do it purposely to see what kind of reaction they will get out of the girl they are with. Like, they might think that if she gets jealous that it means she's still attracted to him. I try not to play those stupid games, but I have caught myself doing it once in a while in the past in order to find out if my girl is still hot for me. Sounds silly and stupid, but I admit it!
And here we go with another of many double standards.
This is where it helps to have a bisexual girlfriend.
And women can't say they don't check out other guys while with their boyfriends.