We've been dating for a year, still not official, is this right?

[awesome_arlene]

I've been talking to this guy, it will be a year in November 13. Now these are the pros and cons of the relationship.

PROS:

-He lives 2 minutes away from me, so we spend a lot of time together

-My parents love him.

-I can hang out with him with my friends

-I'm the first girl he has been able to bring home to, and even get to know his dad. It's a big deal considering that his dad is in the Navy. And he likes me, so that a plus.

-We literally do everything together, grocery shopping, hair cuts, help each other wash our cars, movie nights at each others' houses, homework (we're in college), we cook for each other, go to the gym together, shop together, you name it. We love each others' company. And we do leave each other alone when we need it.

-He's really nice to me, whenever we have an argument or disagreement, we never cuss. We don't cuss at each other or call each other names whatsoever.

-I can hang out with his sisters, and nephew as he can with my brother and sisters. We are close to each others' family.

CONS:

-We have been off and on because he has been indecisive of whether or not he wants to be with me, because he's leaving for the Navy. I've been knowing this since we started talking, and I told him he was worth it for me to wait.

-He doesn't believe in love. Apparently, his last relationship ruined that for me. I already told him I loved him, even though he doesn't 'believe' in it, but he surely shows it to make up for the three words.

-We're already having sex (8 months into the relationship), but there will be times where he would call me his 'friend' or introduce me as one. It bothers me, A LOT. With the things we do, friends don't do that. And yet, he feels the same way when I'm just joking about us just being friends since we're not official!

-We never show minor PDA. Such as holding hands in public. And my friends ask me about that and think it's weird, but I don't know what to say about that, we just don't although I wouldn't mind it.

-He keeps mentioning about moving East (we live in California), but I don't feel like I'm in the picture.

We have been through a lot together, I love him and can see myself with him. He says he does too but, I'm not even his girlfriend. He's leaving in December for 5 weeks for his training. I'm afraid that he's going to end the relationship again. And maybe that's why he hasn't made it official. I just want opinions on whether this is all just a joke. I'm blinded by this relationship and can't really make an opinion for myself to why I'm not his girlfriend.

Sorry it's so long!

[Cool-Relax]

Excluding sex and you telling him that you love him, what you described could easily be a friendship. He even calls you his friend, and you don't hold hands or anything in public, so it would look like a friendship to people on the outside too. He's also said that he doesn't believe in love, which sounds like a red flag that that kind of relationship probably won't happen.

Honestly, it sounds like a friends with benefits deal to me. I've been seeing a guy for over a year and we're still not official, but we live two hours apart and don't get to see each other much. At the same time though, I don't feel like he doesn't want to be with me. He doesn't treat me like a friend. If we lived closer, we would be together. For you, there's really no excuse. Yes, distance could be a strain on your relationship when he goes into the Navy, but he hasn't been in the navy all this time. For the past year, you two could've been together.

I agree with what Littletad said. You need to ask him where things are going with the two of you. That will either help solidify your relationship, or lead you to make some changes. In the event that he doesn't want something serious, it's better for you to know for sure than to keep trying with someone who doesn't feel the same way you do.

[iAmazing]

If He Cnt Makee Up His Mind , Either Makee Him OR LEavee Him .

No One Deservess To Be Toyed W/ Likee How He's Toying W/ Yu .

[Anonymous]

i think you need to leave him if what you're looking for is a relationship because he doesn't want to give it to you

[Littletad]

While you love him and see a future with him, he's never done or said anything to reciprocate those feelings of yours. To agree that he feels the same way with his future. I'm surprised with so much that you have done together, that you both haven't defined the relationship. Not to mention that you are both already sleeping with one another. Take a stand. Ask him what he thinks of his future with or without you. Define the relationship. He does everything with you, yet he feels because he's going away that it's all a waste? Not so. You deserve answers. So ask him.