Why do some men choose to pull the disappearing act?

when they realize they're falling for a woman? why would you leave her feeling confused, abandoned, frustrated...if you do care about her...? I would appreciate an honest answer!


Most Helpful Guy

  • 1) Fear

    - Lots of men fear the point of "making it official" because of several reasons:

    A) She could have ulterior motives, like getting pregnant and then filing child support

    B) She could be an unfit mother, drug user, etc..

    C) The man could get rejected, and if he's liked her for that long.. that hurts

    2) He's genuinely busy and fears that if he makes a move now, he won't be able to later


    3) He recently had massive trauma (family member died, etc) and doesn't feel like talking to anyone. (Men recuperate in their "caves" away from social interaction)

    4) He found someone else that's better. Though I hate adding this to the list, for fear that someone is gonna take it personally, it is true in most occasions.

    5) She doesn't have a lifestyle that he finds attractive (Maybe she works and goes to college, but never goes dancing, and he loves dancing... etc)

    6) She was rude on the last encounter (He opens the door for her, she tells him he's a f***ing p**** and that chivalry is dead.. D: he doesn't call back :D!)

    7) She has poor manors (Talking with her mouth full, Belching horrendously, Farting around friends, etc)

    8) She can only talk about a few subjects rather than many various subjects (Long story but here's the short version: Connection. If I sense someone can only talk about 2 or 3 topics, EVENTUALLY I'll want to talk about something else... you see where this is headed)

    9) 3rd party lies

    - Another I hate to admit, but some friends are highly deceitful

    10) The past

    - If she was a S - L - You - T.. back in highschool.. And we hear about it now.. We grow concerns that she still wants that "fun lifestyle" but is just interested in having a boytoy around as a sugar daddy or as some form of stability.


    This list can go on forever... In truth, he's just not that into you. Shrug your shoulders, count him as a friend if he wants to come back, and keep moving forward in your own life :D

    ~ ArtistBBoy

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      Why don't people just say they are not ready to commit?

      They do not HAVE to do anything they don't want. They must not permit being pushed around.

      Its similar to not wanting to be close , because you don't want sex. You don't HAVE to have sex just because you like someone. You don't HAVE to commit just because you like & get to know each other.

      People are so afraid of other people controlling. it isn't slavery. Stand your ground.

      I don't FEAR as an issue. I think its an excuse to not be CLEAR.