How to make my boyfriend feel better?

[ButterflyMusic]

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 2 years and during these two years he's had his share of crushes and whatnot while I never did. Now we've started college and again he got a new cush on one of the girls in his college (we go to different colleges) but then he told me that he got over her and that I'm the one he really wants. Naturally I got upset and things happened. But nevermind that. Just today I realized that now I have a crush on my classmate. We don't really talk at all unless its a question or two about class and I just couldn't help being attracted to him today. But I do NOT want him. I want my boyfriend! I love him to death!

Stupidly I decided to share this with my guy. I didn't mean to hurt him, I just wanted to tell him all of my feelings and I made it very clear that I want him (my bf) and not the other guy, that I love and adore only him.

However he got really upset and I think I broke him internally and I've cried and a whole bunch of things happened right after another on the phone. So now I hurt him real bad and when I said I love you he just said "okay. I can't say it to you right now"

I understand that but that part reall hurt ME. So now I don't know where we stand. I don't know what will happen and am worried as hell.

How can I make him feel better? & how can I strengthen our relationship back to the way it was and even stronger and also make him love me the way he used to?

[e_t16]

well maybe you guys should talk again--

I think it;s okk to look at other guys and say oh he's hot, and we all have to understand a crush is't our fault if you kinda like another person other than who you're seeing.. but the only thing that makes it wrong is if you actually go off and do something with that other person while you're seeing someone else. So sure- say "oh hey, I kinda like him.." but keep that to yourself and don't actually go out and do anything with that other person.

Maybe you can tell your boyfriend how that made you feel when he would say he has these other crushes and now you know how that feels, both of you do. But let him know he really is the only one in your life that you want right now and sure maybe you see someone you might kinda like, but you'd never be able to love them or look at them like you can your boyfriend. Also that you'd never do anything with anyone else other than your boyfriend.

He'd understand that, seeing as that's how he sees it, I'm sure.

Hope I helped, good luck:)

[Ellex89]

Well, there is more problems here besides the fact that you hurt is feelings. I know you have both said that you want only each other, but that fact that you are finding yourself strongly attracted to someone other than your boyfriend is a problem. It's human nature to have feelings for those outside your partner, but it's only by physical attraction and it seems to me that you've both wondered what it would be like to be with them. It is not good for any relationship if both people are wondering what it's like to be with someone else, perhaps you should take a look at your relationship and really think about the person your with, is the person you want to marry? Is this the person you couldn't live without? If the answer is no, there is no need to repair a relationship that will unfortunately end no matter how hard you try.

[ButterflyMusic]

I know that its wrong. I'm not attracted to that guys looks, I know nothing about his personality or skills or anything.

Yes this is the man I want to marry. I honestly need this man to live my life. I can't be without him. I really adore him and would die for him. He frankly is the reason for my existance.

[Ellex89]

That sounds a little out there haha :D but I believe you. Just tell explain to him you want the relationship to be very open and honest, if he would rather not know, expect his wishes.. but he should be relieved to hear that you're being honest with him. Reassure him that he is special, just like he would you, and he'll eventually relax, I know he trusts you.

[ButterflyMusic]

Thank you so much

[Ellex89]

No problem :D I hope everything works out.

[arsenal25]

why do you have to make him feel better? I don't get it. He had a share of his crushes he tells you about them and you get upset yet for the first time you tell him and you are the one crying and making him feel better? I think you are catering to all of his needs, and he needs to get over it and now he knows how it feels when he tells you about his crushes. And I never actually heard a couples discussing their crushes with each other, that is weird. I think it is a sign you two should take a break and enjoy college just give it a try. I mean how do you know that the guy you are attracted to is not a better guy for you, you will never know unless you guys date around or at least be alone for a little. You can't make someone love you and you shouldnt have to do that.