He sends mixed signals - should I give up or tell him how I feel? It's long but with a lot of detail.

In the past few months I've been able to spend a lot of time with this one guy, within these months although I've noticed him before, by being able to spend more time together I've started to like him a lot. So it seems like he's into me, sometimes he'll compliment me or ask to me to work with him on something, just us. Now I've given him compliments before (and he's accepted) and have even asked him to work on something with me which he completely blew me off, he made up some excuse not to and then I guess after making him feel bad about it he agreed. That was very weird to me and I still don't understand that... Lately there's been some group outings some he's not attended and some he has. There was a outing and I asked him if was going and he seem pretty surprised that I was going too and even said to me that he didn't know that 'cool people' were going to be there. A few days before the outing I said that I would see him on that day and he played dumb like he didn't know what... Show More

Most Helpful Guy

  • i have been stuck in something like this for 6 years. except we both said we liked each other. we deal with the same problems and games. and I have been unable to let it go.

    from the sound of your situation it seems that he is shy, he doesn't want to approach you, won't sit closer to you, try getting him one on one, see if he changes at all.

    i know that I am often shy in a group around the girl I like, I will keep my distance from her, but one on one I tend to be a lot closer.

    as far as mixed signals go, yeah you are sending them back even if you don't realize it. by talking to him a lot and hanging out, then dropping it completely and not talking for a while does confuse him, it shows him that your interested sometimes and then out of no where he means nothing to you.

    as far as him blowing you off and playing dumb, I would go ahead and say that may be his way or retaliation to when you stop talking to him for a week.

    it seems like he thinks you will only be interested in him if he makes you chase him.

    if I were you I would sit down and talk to him about it, find out his feelings, it can't hurt, you said yourself you want out, but you do like him. so talk to him about it, it may be the best thing that you do.

    hopefully the guy you are dealing with is tired of the games too, I know I can't stand the games and I keep holding on just so that I can get a chance, because I really like her too.

    • I never really thought that maybe I was sending mixed signals too. I just didn't want to hang all over him because there was a girl that did the same thing to him before and I'm not about to act like that too. Question: Why is ok for him to initiate one on one time but if I do he pushes me away?

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    • I just don't want to be the only to start conversations with him, I would like for him to start one once in a while so that's why I kind of ignore him. As far as initiating things it has nothing to do with going out it's just about like talking one on one. I just don't get it.

    • Yeah I see what you are saying, and unfortunately I don't know why he won't start a conversation with you. Is he really shy? or does he feel uncomfortable around you? those are two possibilities.