Why do guys ignore girls they like?

Why do guys ignore girls they like?? There’s this guy I’ve known for about five years. We’ve become really good friends and have been flirting a lot back and forth to each other. We email constantly and talk on the phone for at least half an hour every now and then.

The last time we saw each other, around Christmas, we talked for over two hours and once gazed in each other’s eyes for several seconds. That has never happened to me before and it felt great. He finally broke the gaze, looked down, and had an embarrassed-looking smile on his face. Later, when he was taking me home, he was talking about his house and said the next time I’m in town (I live several states away and won’t be home until the summer) we can just meet at his house (which is unusual for him to say as he’s very shy as am I).

But ever since I’ve gone back to my city for work (which was around the first of the new year), I’ve sent him a few emails and have tried to call him a couple times leaving one voice message. You know - just keeping in touch. Absolutely nothing from him - no response from the emails, no returning my calls, nothing. I even sent him a funny email over the weekend and that didn’t even get anything. Usually when I sent a funny email to him he’d respond and pick and tease me.

Here’s my question - he obviously likes me as he’s been flirting with me a lot (or at least that’s what I think). So why is he suddenly ignoring me? What did I do wrong and what can I do to break this out of him since it’s extremely annoying and I’m getting sad and angry at the same time. I’ve tried ignoring him back (the funny email was the first contact I’d made to him in about 10 days so that’s a start), but it’s so hard as I can’t stop thinking about him. It’s almost like he knows I like him, so he flirts just enough for me to go crazy, then he stops. He’s not married and not in a relationship.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Nervosness fear of rejection, self doubt. When a guy who like you suddenly ignores you he is questioning himself not you. Am I over doing it. Does she think I'm annoying. Will she think I'm to clingy or desperate. Trust me I've ignored a lot of girls that I like and every time I do its one reason self doubt. Am I turning her off with my approach. If he thinks he might be annoying you he will try to figure out another route. You may think he is ignoring you but in his mind your all he probobly thinks about and his quest to make you his girl without scaring you aqay in the process

    • Thanks, that makes me feel a little better. Do guys of all age do this ignoring thing or just teens-30s? The guy in question is around 50.

What Guys Said 5

  • It should become less as time goes on. But honestly its omething we never grow out of. The human life span is not long enough for men to mature to the point wear we arnt afraid of scaring a girl away. If we like a girl we don't want to mess up and scare her off. And as long as there is the chance that that could happen or as long as there are some women who get turned off by a wrong word we will feel that way. Of coarse if you let us know that you don't mind that we are flirting that opens us up to flirt more. A lot of it is the uptight women who if a guy smiles the wrong way she gets annoyed. So we are on our toes. But no I don't think we live long enough to outgrow this. Lol we are all boys with girl crushes at heart.

  • This is easy, we do it because we like you and we want you to become closer to us without us putting ourselves out there to get embarrased and hurt. That's what I think. See like you said that you "can't stop thinking about him", girls do that too and I think it's harder for us but when we finally master it we do it too much. People don't wanna fall in love sometimes especially guys, I think people who fear relationships period play games like this so they don't fall for someone and get too involved.

    • But it's like I told blue-kev - I didn't think older men played games like that. He's 59! I've been calling him an immature jerk at the moment, lol.

    • Oh wow, I missed that one

      Yea that makes it a bit harder lol because by then he should have cleaned that habbit up. I'm 20 so I know why guys my age do it. Honestly now that I think about it if he is 59 and single then he is just sticking with old tricks or something so my answer probably still applys. Think about it, people around that age are married, have kids, grand kids even. If he is still playing around you could basically say that he retains our teen and 20's year old mind frame lol

  • I ignore her because I am afraid she will not like me.

  • I tend to do that when I have doubts about a girl, even if a girl is actually interested in me. I could notice a girl and just pretend to not notice her. Girls do that too. They would act all interested in a guy they would like and then just (maybe pretend) ignore them to see if the guy would make the first move or something.

    Just make a move.


What Girls Said 1

  • uhh girl.. maybe she has a girl and he's too afraid to let you know. :/